Mass Effect: To my heart's content
by Porygonman
Summary: ME1 novelization, plan on going canon and full paragon. First series ever posted, hope you enjoy. Also, even though the commander will be in love with someone, no actual romance will happen in this series, even though the crewmember in question and the commander have a thing for eachother.
1. Beginnings

"You think he's ready?"

"Yes. Udina and I rarely see eye to eye, but he could be the game changer we've been looking for."

"For once, we agree Anderson. This man is our best bet for this mission. He's our soldier."

"That's not what I asked, gentlemen. Captain Anderson, _is he ready?"_

"No offense, Admiral Hackett, sir, but I can personally vouch for him. He's the best soldier I've ever seen. Spacer kid, raised in the heart of the military. Best recruit I've ever had the privilege of laying my eyes on. Trained him myself for a while. I watched him grow from the smallest tech expert on his mother's ship, the USS Orizaba, into the man that saved Elysium."

"Anderson, quit your babbling and tell the man what he wants to hear. He's ready, sir."

"Udina, I want every detail I can get on the Commander, and if Anderson needs to babble so I can hear it, then so be it. So quit interrupting."

"Yes sir… of course. Didn't mean to offend…"

"As I was saying, Admiral, he's the best of the best. N7 at the age of 22. Highest rank possible. One of the most talented biotics I've seen. Tech expert. Knows his way around everything, ranging from guns, diplomacy, ships… Awarded the Star of Terra after the Skylian Blitz. He's young, but he has that fire in him. He'll see the mission through."

"Good. That's what I wanted to hear. Let's just hope you're right Anderson. For our sakes and that of humanity's."

"And deities help us all if he fails."

…

 _3 days later_

"Commander!"

Commander John Shepard awoke with a voice calling him through the ships loudspeakers. He'd been sleeping for a couple of hours now, taking in every moment of silence he could get in the crew quarters, which really isn't saying much. " _Still, the ship itself is quieter than any other ship I've served on before. Wonder if it bothers anyone else?"_ he thought to himself. Recollecting his thoughts, he turned his attention towards the speakers and activated his communicator.

"I read you Joker. What's up?"

"Besides from you now? Anderson wants to see you in the bridge. Also, Nyhlus wanted to speak to you later in the comm room."

"Alright, then, here we go. Thanks for the info. And Joker?"

"What?"

"That joke was terrible, even by _your_ very low standards."

He heard a loud sigh through the speakers and smiled. Leaving the crew quarters and heading for the upper deck, Shepard remembered he'd have to go see Dr. Chakwas about his sleep. He'd usually have no trouble sleeping, seeing as he'd never slept much after the Blitz, but still, the Normandy was far too quiet for his liking. He'd gotten used to some noise, any noise really, that normal engines would do, but the SR1 was just so quiet not even the engines made noise. And that made Shepard very uncomfortable.

"Well, could be worst. At least some of the crew snores. Never thought I'd be thankful for _that_ though. And let's not forget about the loudest, meanest mother out there…" He was suddenly interrupted by a voice he'd become very acquainted with. The Canadian accent wasn't too great, but it was still there and he would have noticed it from a mile away.

"Shepard!"- Staff lieutenant Kaiden Alenko shouted has he went down the stairs.

"Kaidan, how are you doing? Still have that headache?-Shepard smiled at one of his only friends, a man he'd come to trust with his life. Alenko had been there since Shepard was in recruit, and they'd been brothers in arms shortly after. No matter how tough Alenko was to get along, Shepard thought of Kaiden as his brother. Plus, the two of them put together could harness so much biotic energy it would make an asari cringe in frustration.

"Yeah, yeah Shepard. This is the part where you boast about your L3's isn't it?"

"What can I say Alenko? Only the best of the best for our proudest N7 commander, and that means no more L2's. Wouldn't want me to be running around getting shot at with those old things, now would you?"

"With all do respect Commander, shut it. You know damn well those prototypes might fail you when you need them the most, that's why they're _prototypes._ My L2's are as reliable as they come nowadays."

"Sure they are, Alenko, that's why you get a headache every time you use them" Shepard had a big smile plastered across his face. He had used the L2 implants many times before, and even though he never experienced the horrible headaches and muscle pain as is friend did, he remembered feeling very unpleasant after strenuous use of his biotics.

"No offense, sir, but I repeat my former statement. Shut it."

"You know, I could technically court martial your ass for disrespecting a superior" Shepard was joking, of course, but he still kept a straight face. But, alas, he broke down and started laughing when he saw Kaiden suddenly start fidgeting and saying he was sorry.

"Just messing with you Alenko! Right now, I don't think I could ask for a better friend! Just keep getting my ass out of the fire and you can tell me to shut it… most of the time, at least."

Kaiden's uneasy smile came through, and he quickly replied:

"Shepard, if we're being honest here, I've got to put this out there, I am not gonna haul your ass out of fire anymore than you've already hauled mine. We're a team."

"Well, gotta keep going. Anderson and Nyhlus want to talk with me."

"Great talk, Commander. See ya later then"

As Kaiden stepped away, Shepard remembered a bet he'd made with him a while back. So he turned around and screamed from the bottom of his lungs:

"HEY LIEUTENANT!"

"What?"

"I SHOULD GO."

Both men laughed for a while before going back to their own business.


	2. A what now?

…

 _Normandy comm. room, ten minutes later_

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you correctly. You're telling me you want me to become a _what_?" Shepard's disbelief at Nyhlus' and Anderson's request grew the more he thought about it.

"You heard him right, Shepard. We want you to be the first human Spectre." Anderson proclaimed, with his loud, straight forward voice booming through the room, making the moment even more .

"Yes, commander, your skills would greatly aid the Council and the Spectres. If what they say about your part in the Skylian Blitz is true, you're one of the best human soldiers out there, if not the best."-Nyhlus added, his turian expression impossible to read. His voice was like steel, strong and convincing, like a General's speech to his men before a great battle.

Shepard had always wondered if all turians had this discipline. He'd fought with them a couple of times, on Alliance Special Ops, but never had he talked to one on shore leave, or in an informal tone for that matter, something he fully regretted. Shepard found alien species fascinatingly compelling, and strived to learn more about them whenever he could. He'd read up on most Council space sentient races, and on the batarians and geth during training as a Sentinel, but he knew the extranet couldn't be trusted on what most species do on their free times, or else the asari would all be dancers, turians would all be at boot camp and salarians would all be wimps in lab coats.

One time even, after the events of the Skylian Blitz, a hanar tried to hit on him. A _hanar._ Shepard was as far from racist as he could be but he did not want to go out with a very polite floating jellyfish. Worst, Alenko and Anderson had used that story against him more times than he could count.

Shepard mentally chuckled at the memory and decided to proceed with his conversation with the Spectre and the Captain.

"Captain, I'm not sure what to say. Why me? You have the most impressive service record in the Alliance _and_ a commendation from Admiral Hackett himself. Why me and not you?"

"Shepard, I've seen you grow from a little pest in the Orizaba into the soldier you are today. I was asked to provide background to the Council on your Spectre application. Nyhlus here knows all about you, except for personal details and in combat mentality."

"You haven't really answered my question, sir."-Shepard said, trying desperately not to sound offensive while still keeping his posture and getting an answer. He got more than he bargained for when Anderson started to move towards him while passionately saying:

"You wanna know why, Shepard? Because you're not just another well trained grunt. You're not just another soldier in the front lines doing his best for the Alliance. You're a symbol. A hero. You're one of the youngest N7 members to have graduated to Commander. You're the best goddamn Sentinel I've laid my eyes on, and I'll remind you Alenko is on this ship. And what do you do with all the pride, all the respect that comes with it? You disregard it and stay yourself. You've managed to somehow not take advantage of your status a single time during your career. You've seen more combat than most post First Contact War veterans out there and you still think you're just another soldier! Hell, Shepard, the only reason the people of Elysium don't have a statue in your honor is because you asked them not to build it and use that money to help out with other refugees! Everyone on the Skylian Verge knows you by name!"-Anderson became more and more vocal on the way he felt about the Commander the closer he got to him, and by the time he was finished, he was standing two feet away from the Commander and the emotion in his voice was nearly palpable.

He'd been Shepard's first training instructor, back in the day when the kid was still only twelve and Anderson had to take a trip aboard the Orizaba on an Alliance raid on batarian slavers. He had found Shepard while inspecting the ships engines, helping out an engineer with a few FBA couplings. The child had noticed him and approached him slowly, saluting and congratulating Anderson as his hero. He'd said he wanted to be N7 just like Anderson one day.

"Sure has hell wasn't lying"- Anderson thought at the memory. Until he actually had to leave the Orizaba, Anderson had become friends with the young Shepard, and took some of his own personal time into teaching him all he needed to know about hand to hand combat, sharpshooting and sharing his own eccentric war time stories from the First Contact War.- "And now that kid is humanity's finest. Maybe it was worth putting up with is requests for "only one more story". God knows I'm not falling for that one again."

He stared at Shepard again, seeing his… embarrassment? No, it wasn't that, Shepard knew well he had done good, he just didn't think he had done anything out of the ordinary, so it wasn't embarrassment. Denial? No, Shepard wouldn't be that dense. A mix of both, it seemed. He was… constrained. Now Anderson was sure. The Commander knew deep down that what Anderson was saying was true, but he was just too modest to accept it.

"I lost good people that day Anderson. I couldn't save them. Those deaths are on me."-Shepard added grimly, and to Anderson's dismay, with genuine guilt.

"And you saved ten times more! You single handedly took out over a thousand batarians over the course of the battle, and you're telling me you didn't do enough? If civilians died that day, Shepard, it was on the batarians, not you. And half of your squad made it out because you stood there and took enemy fire for them. They see you as a legend, Shepard."

"Anyone could have done what I did. Any Alliance soldier who's true to his or hers line of duty would have done the same."-Shepard said solemnly, laying all his hopes on this one, final argument.

"You're right Shepard. Any other person could have fought to save Elysium from disaster."-Anderson he continued-"But you know something Shepard? They didn't have to. Because you were there to save them. All of them. And no one else could have done a better job."

Shepard just stood there in awe. He looked at Nyhlus, who had been hearing their whole conversation, and he realized, Captain Anderson… was right. He was a symbol, a hero. Not because of his actions, but because of his willingness to act. And if that's how the galaxy wanted to look at him, he wouldn't stop them. But he sure as hell wasn't going to change who he was or what he stood for.

"If that's what you want to call me, fine. I'll be humanity's hero, Captain. I'll become a Spectre. But I sure as hell don't like being thought highly of."

"Good to know you saw reason son. Now let's get you ready. You're gonna show Nyhlus and the whole galaxy just why we want you to become humanity's first Spectre. And that begins with our destination."-Anderson spoke in a more tender voice, not patronizing, but as cheerful as he could be after decades in the military.

"Eden Prime…"


	3. Eden Prime

…

 _Twelve hundred hours, Eden Prime_

Nihlus felt sick watching the desecrated bodies of husks that had used to be human children. He had seen a lot of war and death in his time as a Spectre, but the horrors the geth had made out of the harmless human colonists repulsed him.

"How did this all happen?"-Nihlus thought to himself-"Spirits, this was supposed to be a normal shakedown run. I was expecting pirates, or slavers, but _geth_? The Council is just going to love hearing about this…"

He heard a noise coming from behind him and turned to find two get drones hovering above him. He quickly dashed to safety, grabbing cover behind an unusual rock formation. As he hid, he noticed he was on top of something soft. Looking down on what he was crouching on, he felt an urge to puke. He laid atop a dead couple, clearly ripped apart by husks, guts spilling out of their bodies. He couldn't say if it was made better or worse by the fact that, even though they had been brutally murdered, the couple had died in each other's embrace, dying with their loved one in their arms as their insides were clawed out.

A group of three geth troopers appeared behind some buildings, joining the drones in their attempt to kill the Spectre. Nihlus then felt an enormous rage overcome him, a powerful hatred for those machines, the precise, synthetic butchers that had taken all those people's lives. Despite all his training, all his combat, only one thought ran through his mind: revenge.

He got up and sprayed a burst of shots from his rifle into the drones, taking them out instantaneously. His incendiary rounds, added to the drones own propensity to explode after being taken out, as to not be captured by the enemy, made for an excellent distraction. While the geth's sensors were still picking up on all this new data, the turian had already run half the distance that separated the opposing parties. With three swift, perfectly coordinated movements, Nihlus retracted his rifle, put it on his back, and wiped out his shotgun. Gaining momentum with each step, he took a shot at the trooper closest to him, instantly taking the geth out. At the same time, he used his omni-tool to sabotage another geth, making him fumble around and eventually explode. However, the other remaining unit was a shock trooper, and used a "Carnage" like technique to try and take out Nihlus. But the famed Spectre had taken an entire platoon by himself, and he wasn't about to get killed by some random geth on a human colony. He kept moving, and at the last possible second, ran a program through his omni-tool to mess with the projectile's tracking capabilities. He then jumped over the projectile, gaining even more momentum before smashing into his synthetic foe, putting all his weight and armor into one, powerful charge. A krogan couldn't have done it better, and the shock trooper was instantly incapacitated.

But not deactivated. No, Nihlus had been careful enough not to completely destroy the geth. He would need it's information core intact to find out what had happened to the colony. "Besides"-Nihlus said to himself, a dark grin growing across his turian face- "it's about damn time we find out if these feel pain."-he said, right before reaching for his knife and ripping the geth's main light off. To his satisfaction, the horrible screeching noise the geth made afterwards was delightfully similar to a scream. Just like the screams off the children that now laid dead on the once beautiful colony that was Eden Prime.

…

"JENKINS!"-Shepard shouted, his tone filled with grief and worry as the corporal was showered with bullets, instantly penetrating his shields and armor, splashing crimson red blood all over the grass.

The Commander acted immediately, in a mix of instinct, cunning and muscle memory from the days he'd spent training with the crew. He quickly ordered Alenko to use his Sabotage on one of the drones. While Kaidan overloaded the core of one of the drones, Shepard used his biotics to throw it's soon to explode corpse at the other drone, effectively taking them both out with one move of his hand. He then ran to Jenkins side as the young soldier choked on his own blood, desperately gasping for air.

"Com-mand-der…"-the young soldier managed to blurt out in between spasms and grimly faint breaths.

"Don't talk now Jenkins, I'm applying medi-gel. I'm getting you out of here, soldier. Just don't die on me, you hear? Don't die!"-the Commander Knew it was bad. The bullets had gone straight through his lungs and shrapnel was stuck in his flesh. Chances were at least one bullet had made it to the heart… and no amount of medi-gel could heal that.

"Tha-ank you s-si-sir. Ma-made th-them proud."

Jenkins head fell to the side, his consciousness rapidly fading away. The Commander grabbed it and stared into his eyes.

"Jenkins, look at me! LOOK AT ME! You're too young to die of now son! You have your whole life ahead of you. Don't give up now, you can MAKE it!"- Shepard felt terrible that not even he believed his own words. He knew he was seeing the man in front of him die, and it disgusted him that there was nothing he could do about it. "Just like the Blitz,"-Shepard thought-"I wasn't good enough. And now people die because of me."

"Comma-ander?"-Jenkins managed to blurt out, sending another pool of blood,dripping from his mouth and into the floor. He knew he was going to die. He wasn't that concerned. All he wanted now was the pain to end. But he knew he couldn't go just yet.

"Yes Jenkins… I'm right here son. Right next to you. You made us proud. I'm sorry."-Shepard was tearing up inside, but he knew he couldn't show it. Instead, he kept his posture, showing only a hardened soldier trying to make the last moments of his fellow comrade somewhat more bearable. But Alenko had served with and under Shepard for many years. He knew that the Commander was taking this hard. How could he not? A kid was dying before them, and knowing Shepard, he probably blamed himself. But then Jenkins spoke.

"Not… your… fault…"-Jenkins said, exhaling for the last time in his life.

…

Nihlus had kept moving on ahead of Shepard. Has he reached a digsite, he noticed that the geth had already arrived. Then he heard gunfire. Thinking his position was compromised, he hit the ground and reached for his rifle to assess the situation. To his surprise, however, he found a large group of about ten geth were shooting not at him, but at two Alliance soldiers. "Survivors?" Nihlus though, a million questions running through his brain. One of the soldiers was male, and wasn't wearing armor, but he carried bruises and handled his M6-Avenger quite well, suggesting he had seen combat before. He was limping, blood coming out of a wound on his right thigh as he struggled forward. The other soldier, a female, in full white and pink body armor, carried him in her arms as fast as she could, holding him close with one hand and using the other to shoot at the geth with her Predator.

Nihlus knew they'd never make it, so he took out his sniper rifle and started giving them covering fire. He took out a couple of troopers before they noticed him, sending half of their remaining forces after him, while the other half focused on the Alliance survivors. Nihlus switched to his pistol and activated his marksman app with his omni-tool. He took four shots at the geth, taking three of them down with headshots at a distance and missing the fourth one by an inch.

By then, the geth had put down his shield, which prevented Nihlus from not only taking down this trooper, but also from supplying covering fire to the humans. So Nihlus acted fast, switched to his sniper rifle and ran straight at the shield. He wiped out a knife, an old turian dagger, a relic that he had carried with him since recruit. It was as sharp as the day it had been carved, and it had saved Nihlus life many times. He reached the geth shield, overloaded it with a touch to his omni-tool, and took a stab at the geth. The dagger swiftly carved into the synthetic alloy, cutting off vital systems and destroying the geth's ability to respond. He then used his sniper rifle to take two shots, ending the life, if it could even be called so, of two geth troopers that were firing at the humans.

As he prepared to take down the two last machines, someone else shot at him, making his shields flutter. He turned back to see twenty geth, moving towards some sort of space port. It wasn't the large number of enemies that worried him though, but the large explosives they were carrying.

"They plan on taking out the colony!"- Nihlus knew he didn't have time to save the humans and stop the geth. "Besides, if they detonate those things, we're all dead anyway."

With resignation, he saw that the human male was captured by the geth troopers, while the female was given chase by two geth drones that had appeared meanwhile. "I'm sorry."-he said to himself. He left the humans to their own as he proceeded towards the space port, shooting at the geth. It was going to be a long day.

…

"Commander, look!"-Alenko shouted, pointing at the commotion in front of them. A woman, the same one Shepard had seen in the transmission of what was happening on Eden Prime back on the Normandy, was now running for her life, being shot by two geth drones. Turning around and shooting them while running, she managed to take one of them out with a few shots before hiding behind a rock to take cover. Poking her head out, she saw two geth troopers holding her comrade near a small structure. She could have never predicted what happened next: a pole came from the structure, impaling the soldier while he screamed in agony, his chest being burst open to reveal the spiky tip of the structure that had just killed him.

Shepard didn't waste time. He knew the woman was in danger, and he wasn't about to lose anyone else on this mission. It was time for revenge.

And those machine were going to pay dearly.


	4. Turian Spectres

…

 _Thirteen hundred hours,Eden Prime_

"Saren? What are you doing here?"-Nihlus asked worriedly. He'd just taken out most of the geth in the area, but the ones carrying explosives were still at large. They'd taken the tram to the other station, and Nihlus had only stopped giving chase when he saw the other turian standing there.

"Ah, Nihlus."-Saren said, a somewhat sarcastic and severe tone in his voice.-"The Council thought you could use some help on this one."

"And so they sent the best Spectre in the galaxy has backup? I didn't know they cared!"-Nihlus said, adding a joking tone to his voice. He was relieved to have found a friend, a brother in arms during that mayhem. It had been far too long since he and Saren had worked together, back in the day they were just rookies trying to make a name for themselves in a harsh, unforgiving galaxy.

"Oh, they don't Nihlus. Not for a second they don't. The Council. Ha! A bunch of cowards, liars and hypocrites! The galaxy would be better off without their rule on everything."-Saren's words were filled with rage, pure anger palpable in his rant.

"Take it easy there Saren. Don't get too worked up, or you'll end up getting your Spectre status revoked, and neither of us wants that, now do we? You're the best one out there, and a role model to every turian out there!"

"Thank you Nihlus. But I fear the galaxy will not look at me that way soon, even if I strive to do that which his correct."-Saren now sounded a little more like a normal person. Nihlus wondered what he meant, and what was running through his mind, but paid no attention to it when he remembered one of his earliest finds.

"That reminds me, look what I've got here."-Nihlus threw an hard drive at Saren, who easily snatched it from the middle of the air.-"Ripped it out from one of the geth. If we can crack it the decryption, we might find out just why these geth… and whatever _that is…_ "-Nihlus was pointing at the giant, red ship behind the building.-"are doing here."

"I see. And you are sure this information his fullproof?"

"Definitely. I took special care in to making sure that it wasn't damaged. Synthetic bastard never had a chance."-Nihlus said, feeling somewhat proud and happy with himself for having been the one to get the evidence they would need to expose the ones behind the attack, and get revenge against them for butchering all those innocents.

Suddenly, a small group of geth approached the space port. Nihlus took out his sniper rifle and trained his scope on the leader of the group.

"Gonna be one hell of a fight with you here. Think we can handle this?"

He heard Saren get his pistol ready and imagined he would soon see geth falling to his shots.

"No… but _I_ can."-the last thing Nihlus heard was a loud bang before his head exploded with pain for a split second. Then, only silence remained as he bled out on the floor. His last thoughts were: " _Why?"_

…

Shepard was infuriated. He thought he'd had the worst of it when Jenkins had died, knowing beforehand that he would force himself, in a mix of kindness, empathy and grief, to inform the soldiers parents of what had happened. "If they're even still alive after this attack, that is."-he thought to himself. He was disgusted at what the geth had done to the soldier that was with Corporal Williams, his newest companion. But even that paled in comparison to the horrible repercussions of the image in front of him. The words "political shitstorm" crossed his mind.

Nihlus was dead. Shot a single time, back of the head. A pool of blood dripped still from his head.

"Damnit."-Shepard blurted out involuntarily, the words slipping from the edge of his tongue.

"What's a _turian_ doing here?"-Ashley Williams asked. Something about the way she said "turian" unsettled him, but he had no time to delve into it.

"He's… he _was_ a Spectre. He was the one that told us to rendezvous here through the comms. Nihlus was his name. They say he took out an entire enemy platoon all by himself. For him to die like this… is just disrespectful."

"What do you mean? He got shot, just like everyone else on this damn colony!"-Ashley said, confused at the Commander's words and fearful that Shepard was one of those "idiotic alien lover wimps", who in her mind had replaced humanity's interests for mistrusted love and acceptance of aliens. She'd never liked aliens on account of her grandfather's legacy, and turians in general repulsed her. Seeing the Commander this shaken up about Nihlus being dead and hearing his words of apparent sorrow made her question his integrity and commitment to mankind for the first time. And certainly not the last.-"Was he your friend or something? Were you and the _turian_ close?"

There it was again. The way she said turian deeply unsettled and disturbed Shepard. It felt like an insult, like being a turian was something terrible, something wrong, something to be ashamed of. He would definitely have to speak with her about her attitude towards aliens later. But right now, he had a few questions to answer.

"No. We weren't. This was our first mission together. It was supposed to be the first of many, but clearly that idea has been thrown out the window and into the shitter. You see, this man did something for humanity that we should all be grateful for. He recommended a _human_ as a Spectre." Shepard said, sarcastically emphasizing the word "human" just like Williams had emphasized "turian" a few seconds earlier.-" That human was me. I was the candidate that this _turian_ chose to be the newest Spectre, and the first ever human one. It was our one chance to get some sort of quick power and influence in a galaxy that fears us just as much as we fear them. And now all the political power the Alliance could have gained, along with any of the chances a human had at becoming a Spectre and my candidature, have been set back years."

Shepard neared the dead turian, and with as much military honor and gratefulness he could, he laid on one knee next to the corpse and respectfully closed his comrade's eyes. After a moment of silence, he turned to Williams, his knee still glued to the ground, his gaze the only thing that turned towards her.

"I did some research on him. Great soldier. Saved a lot of lives. You wanted to know why I don't think he should have died like this? Take a look at the back of his head then. A single bullet hole."- Shepard said, the anger in his voice becoming more apparent, even if he did a great job at concealing it's full extent.-"This wasn't the geth's doing. They'd never sneak close enough to get a shot through his shields without being detected, and they would've shot more than once. No, Nihlus was shot at point blank range. With a pistol too probably, from the diameter and shape of the wound. So it was either an assassin or someone close to him. I don't know which would be worst. And that's why I'm sorry that I didn't get here sooner, and pissed that this soldier, this brother in arms died like this. No man with his service record deserves to die assassinated by a bullet he never even knew was coming for him."-with this, Shepard got up and headed towards a pile of boxes to look for supplies. After all, they'd need all the help they could get if there was something out there dangerous, or desperate enough, to kill a Spectre.

"Time to go find that beacon."


	5. The beacon

_Hey everyone! Sorry about the delay on this one, I promise I'll have more out tomorrow, but I have a test coming up next week and I just did one yesterday and got the results on two others… An A is always nice, but I need to work on my B… anyway, hope you enjoy, and Happy N7 day! MEA HYPPPPEEE!_

…

"Shepard! No!"-Ashley Williams screamed.

"So this is how it ends, huh? Taken out by a beacon."-Shepard thought, realizing the full extent of his predicament. He and his group had just reached the prothean beacon, after an intense fight with geth troopers, probably the last remaining ones in the entire colony. As they went to secure it, Corporal Williams wandered too close to the mysterious artifact, beginning a chain of events that even now, has he floated in mid air, desperately struggling to free himself from the invisible tugs that wrapped and constrained him, only a few seconds after Williams had unwittingly triggered a failsafe on the beacon, he had a hard time remembering.

As Ash stepped towards the beacon, she felt a sudden pull and, before she could get away or call for help, a million fingers were digging into her mind, stopping her from being able to form any rational thought. Luckily for her, Shepard saw this happen and made a mad dash towards her. He had acted more out of instinct than out of thought, closing the distance between them in a second before selflessly pushing Williams out of the beacon's influence, taking her place instead. The beacon rapidly exerted its influence on Shepard, trapping him in the same mental cage as Ashley, not being able to consciously move his limbs, jerking his body in all possible directions, his mind burning with a million images, flowing like a river of memory through his brain. He saw death, pain and destruction, machines slaughtering, butchering people, flesh being ripped apart, blood dripping, synthetic materials. Synthetics. _Synthetics… a merge of flesh and bone…_

Somehow, among this turmoil, Shepard had heard a loud cry behind him, a shout of desperate anguish belonging to Ashley Williams. In his spasms, he caught a brief glimpse of his two companions, Alenko bravely taking the right course of action and stopping Ashley from interfering with the beacon and the Commander before any other side effects could take place. Looking at his teammate's faces, their expressions, their _emotions_ , Shepard took a stand.

He would not allow his body to die here and now. He would not stop now, not with a crazed killer on the loose, responsible for the death of thousands. He would not impose the burden of guilt and responsibility for Eden Prime on his fellow soldiers. He would fight with all he had until he either succeeded or died. And he wasn't going to die.

Feeling himself slip away into the pain and sheer influence of the beacon, Shepard focused all of his efforts into one final attempt at breaking free. He remembered those who meant the most to him. His mother, a respectful Captain and a caring parent. Anderson, his commanding officer, mentor and lifelong fatherly figure. Kaiden, his best friend through training and now proud Staff-Lieutenant. And his father, the man whose sacrifice had made him vow to join the Alliance as a child…

Shepard relieved all his strongest emotions, all his deepest and most important memories, in a strenuous, yet determined way. The day his father died. The day he graduated from recruit. The day he had loved for his first time. How he had lost this love in Elysium. The Blitz itself. All of this, and much more coursed through Shepard's brain, igniting something primal inside of him, something fierce and violent. He felt anger, love, tenderness compassion, hatred, all at the same time.

He had carved his way into his psyche and was now recovering all off it in one single moment. This alone would have killed most of the people in the galaxy. But Shepard remained determined, and with one final act of defiance before becoming unconscious, he managed to break free from the beacon's grasp for only one second to grab his sidearm.

What he wasn't expecting, however, was that the fifty thousand year old beacon would just burst into flames and implode violently, sending Shep's body flying through the air and into Alenko and Williams. During his struggle with the machine, he had brought it under strain, and the ancient machine was just not in any condition to fight such willpower as Shepard's. With a final, victorious grin on his face, Shepard slipped into unconsciousness on top of his two, very agitated, confused and concerned friends.

…

He woke up in a small room which he did not immediately recognize. He laid in a stone tablet of some sort, in a room filled with little lights, the cold stone that touched his naked back sending shivers down his spine. He wasn't sure where he was, but it had an aura of familiarity to him. All he did know, was that he didn't have his shirt. Which meant he didn't have his armor on, which according to his last memory, that of him in a devastated colony, was bad. He tried getting up to assess his surroundings, but to no avail. It seemed as if his muscles didn't want to respond to his commands.

"Shepard? Are you all right?"- suddenly, a voice called next to him. It was Dr. Karin Chakwas, the Normandy's resident medic. With this knowledge, Shepard quickly understood that he was in the ship's med bay. With a sense of relief making its way to his brain, Shepard quickly whipped out his trademark joking personality to try and make everything seem good.

"Thought I'd be asking you that question doc…"-Shepard said, a small smile forming on the edge of his lips.

"Don't sass me, Commander. A few more moments under that beacon's influence and you wouldn't be asking me anything. EVER."- she added the last word with a mix of anger and worry. Even though she didn't show it very often to other people for whatever reason, Shepard knew Chakwas was an empathic, concerned doctor. She would sometimes blurt these small things, such as "Glad you're still with us" or "Don't go putting yourselves in danger, I'm the one that has to patch you up!",which most people would just assume to come with her rank as a medic. But Karin Chakwas really felt as if the crew of the SSV Normandy was her family, and Shepard knew this. It was one of the reasons that, despite the diference between their ages, they had been able to become friends.

"Alright, alright, bad joke. So tell me doc, how bad is it?"

"You're asking about the colony and the geth, aren't you?"-she let out with a sigh. Many a times had she, and everyone else that knew Shepard, tried to get him to think about himself, but to no avail. The man just seamlessly ignored his own condition, while attending to that of those around him.

With a sudden flash of light and the sound of a door opening, Anderson stepped into the room with haste. He looked Shepard straight in the eye and answered his question.

"You have no idea, Shepard. _This mission just got a lot more complicated."_


	6. A quarian in distress

…

"So, how did the meeting with the Council go?"-Joker asked Captain Anderson, as the old officer made his way back to the SSV Normandy.

"Not good. The Councilors will refuse to believe that their top operative went rogue for as long as we don't present hard evidence. We're on our own for now."-he said gravely.

"Gee, leave it to the Council to let us hanging when we need them. I bet Shepard didn't take it too well."

"He remained composed during the trial but yes… he was visibly shaken. He even stood up to the Councilors when they tried to undermine my credibility as an officer because of an incident regarding Saren a few years back."

"Wait, you'd met Saren before sir? So that "I know Saren, he'll kill us all" thing wasn't just an act to get us motivated? 'Cus it sure as hell worked on the rookies."- Joker blatantly stated, trying to lighten up the mood.

"Joker, quit the chatter. Your jokes get worst by the second, and they weren't any good to begin with."-Anderson was clearly not in the mood for Joker's idea of comedy. To be fair, he dealt with Joker every day, and his jokes were getting pretty bad. But the Captain managed to hear a small murmur from the pilot seat which made him re-evaluate his mental comment about Joker's skills as a comedian.

"Yeah, yeah… and you marine types have a sense of humor so low it puts krogan fertility rates to shame…"-Anderson couldn't contain a small giggle, and was glad no one had heard it. Deciding he had given Joker enough negative feedback, he took it upon himself to warn the pilot about Shepard's recent acquaintances.

"You know Joker, you should probably avoid making racial comments from now on. The Commander stayed behind to find evidence against Saren, and he just so happens to have met a few people that may not be too prone to your… idea of alien comedy."-Anderson added mysteriously.

"What, is he bringing a krogan aboard the ship?"

"Yeah, I believe his name is Wrex. And also a turian. For now, at least. He's about to raid Chora's Den from what I've picked up from his intercom."

"Wait, are you serious?!"-Joker asked, a worried look spreading across his face.-" A _krogan…_ AND a _turian?_ How did he manage that?!"

"Apparently, they have a common target. They're looking for a guy named Fist. He's supposed to have information about a quarian who has proof of Saren's involvement with the geth."

"Never a dull moment with you guys, is there?"-Joker said sarcastically, while mentally planning how in the hell to stop a krogan and a turian _hardasses_ from damaging his ship.

…

"Quick, it's the alleyway just ahead!"-Shepard said in between heavy panting. Even after all his workouts, Shepard found it hard to run with all of his armor's weight on top of him. 'It feels like I'm carrying a brick wall on my shoulders', he thought.

Garrus Vakarian and Urdnot Wrex ran alongside the Commander. He had met them only a while back, but was glad he had taken them with him for the assault on Chora's Den. Garrus' marksmanship with a sniper rifle and versatility with an assault rifle and a pistol had come in handy when they had taken the fight to the club bouncers, and Wrex's sheer brutality and biotics, coupled with his blood rage and shotgun wielding prowess, had made all the thugs in the club turn into mush in under three minutes.

He only regretted taking Wrex on the account of him having killed Fisk, an action that, even though Shepard had agreed with on one hand, since Fisk was a horrible criminal and all around asshole, he could not abide for on the other. The idea killing unharmed prisoners in cold blood simply disgusted him. But he would have to worry about it some other time, as right now, their priority was to save the quarian female that not only had proof against Saren, but was risking her own life on that very moment just by trying to share it with someone she had falsely thought trustworthy.

"On it Shepard, want me to take point?"-Garrus asked, griping his assault rifle mid sprint. Although Shepard liked his style of shooting first and asking questions later, he still didn't have enough experience with this new team to make that call. Instead, he decided to go with subtlety and caution.

"No, Vakarian, I'll do that!" Wrex shouted, his powerfull krogan voice filled with contempt over having to work with a _turian._

"Both of you, quit it! Wrex, I want you with me at all times! Garrus, you stay back and give us covering fire with your sniper rifle. I give you the signal, you start taking them out, ok?"

"Hmpf. You got lucky this time, _turian._ Wouldn't want you to get hurt now, would we?"- Wrex blurted out. He didn't hate the turians, but he certainly disliked them, and Garrus' former C-sec affiliation aggravated Wrex. 'Damned turians, always thinking they're superior to us. They think themselves better than everyone else! At least this one knows how to shoot a gun, the gutsy pyjak.'

"Wrex, shut up. If you can't put that crap behind you while on mission, stand down now and go away."-Shepard seriously couldn't take anymore racial bullshit at this point, not after hearing Ashley _repeatedly_ mention she 'couldn't tell the aliens from the animals.'

"Come on Shepard, I was just messing around. No harm intended!"-Wrex had a sly smile on his face as he spoke, looking directly at Garrus.

"Yeah, yeah krogan. Just don't count on me to give you backup if one of those thugs gets too close."

"Is that a threat or a promise, you little pyjak?"-Wrex said, amused at the turians weak response.

"You know what I find funny Wrex? There are over ten quintillion particles in the universe that we can observe."

"Yeah, so what's your point, turian? Is the size of the number supposed to intimidate me?"

"Oh no, not at all. In fact, I don't think any amount of culture, which you clearly lack, could intimidate you. I just find it to be amazing how your mother managed to put all of the ugly ones into one dumb rhino, but sure as my name being Garrus, you're here to prove it."-the smug look the turian had on his face assured Shepard that Garrus would suffer a horrible death by shotgun disembowelment. But just as the situation was seemingly going to escalate, Wrex did something Shepard wouldn't have guessed in a million years. The krogan _laughed._

"HAHAHA! You're all right, turian! If anyone else had said that to my face, I'd have killed them on the spot. But to hear a lousy turian saying it, worse, a stupid C-sec agent, I've finally realized you've got either a big pair of reproductive glands, or a death wish. If it's the first, I'm glad I can fight with you on my side for now! If it's the second one, well, find some other idiot to do the job or do it yourself!"

With renewed relief, Shepard opened a door and stepped into the alley Fist had mentioned.

"You two ladies done yet? I see the quarian and the assassins further down the hallway. Wrex, with me. Garrus, bunker down and lay down covering fire on my go."-Shepard was ready for action. He wouldn't let a civilian die over evidence against Saren, specially someone who could at any point destroyed it. The fact that the quarian had held onto the evidence long after she had been shot by Saren's assassins meant she was determined to do the right thing, one way or the other. Shepard wouldn't let someone like that just die in a ditch to a few assassins.

He readied his shotgun, and aimed it at the turian in front of the quarian.

…

"Did you bring it?"-the turian in front of her said, his voice filled with greed. She knew she couldn't show just how uneasy she was about the deal, and tried keeping herself cool as she inspected the room. Something was off.

"Where's the Shadow Broker? Where's Fist?"-she said, becoming more and more restless as she saw the two salarians in the room quietly stepping away from her field of vision.

"They'll be here. Where's the evidence?"-the turian spoke gently again, but something about his voice just triggered a primal instinct of survival in her. Was it the lust in his voice?

She felt his arm reach out and touch the side of her head. Disgusted, she quickly pushed his hand away from her and started preparing to escape.

"No way. The deal's off."-it was clear from the turian's expression that he wasn't going to let her go easily. 'So be it, she thought.'

As she looked back to see the two salarians behind her, she managed to catch a brief glimpse of a gun pointing towards her. With no time to waste, she threw a homemade IED at them, stunning them and sending them back as she brushed past the turian and headed into cover. She turned back right as she was reaching cover to see the turian pointing a gun to her head at point blank range.

And then a bullet went through his head, scattering brains all over the floor. She didn't know what was happening, but suddenly two other salarians had joined the conflict. Raising her shotgun, she shot one of the four down. She thought it was all over when the other three reached for their weapons, but out of nowhere, a _krogan_ , of all things, appears out of nowhere and just rams the one in the front. Even weirder, a human was right behind him, and masterfully sabotaged their weapons, a technique she had used herself many times, before using a mass effect field to trap the remaining two salarians before taking them down with his shotgun.

She wasn't quite sure what she had just seen, but she didn't have much time to think as the human approached her. Scrambling to find something to say, she could only sound aggravated as she yelled:

"Fist set me up! I knew I couldn't trust him!"

The human had a worried look on his face as he approached her. She expected him to interrogate her about the evidence, but the young male in front of her did something very few people had done to her. He was _polite._

"Are you alright miss? Are you injured?"

Taken back from his concern, she tried to find an answer to give him and an explanation for his concern over her. 'He must think I hid the data before coming her', she thought.

"I know how to look after myself. But thanks for the help. Who are you anyway?"

He gave her a faint, reassuring smile as he answered:

"I'm a friend. Commander John Shepard, glad to meet you. I'm with the Alliance. To put it bluntly, we were looking for information against Saren when we heard you might need a friendly hand with a few assassins. Seems like we made it just in time too."

"I appreciate the help. Not many people would fight assassins over a quarian. And now, I have a chance to repay you for saving my life. Here's the evidence you were looking for."-she said, feeling as if she could trust the human. 'Shepard, huh? Seems like a nice person.'. She then played the recording she had obtained from a geth unit. Saren's voice boomed thorugh the room:

"Eden Prime was a major victory! The beacon has brought us one step closer to finding the Conduit."

Then, a turian walked from behind the human and talked to him:

"We should take her to the embassy. Your ambassador will want to hear this."

"Is this alright with you, miss…?"-Shepard said, an inquisitive look on his face as he searched for her name. She quickly realized that though he had been kind enough to introduce himself, she had not.

"Oh, right, sorry. My name is Tali. Tali'Zorah nar Rayya."-she said, a little embarrassed at her lack of etiquette and his curiosity towards her. Few people had treated her like this on her travels, but most of them had already had contact with her or other quarians. It seemed as if this human was seeing a quarian for the first time, and still he was being nice to her. Then, he spoke:

"Pleased to meet you Tali'Zorah. Sorry it was under these circumstances. So, what do you say?"-he asked, genuine curiosity and eagerness in his voice. He offered her his hand, which she took for a human custom she was unaware of.

She thought about it for a few seconds, not still truly grasping the concept of his offer. He was willing to take a _quarian_ into the Presidium and in front of an ambassador?! He certainly was different than most people. She finally made up her mind, and gave him a smile through her mask, which even though he couldn't see, was pretty obvious from the tone of her voice.

"I'm in."-she said, taking his hand and shaking it in approval.


	7. New faces, old memories

Authors note: hey everyone, sorry for the lack of content yesteday, I was really busy babysiting my nephew. But now I'm totally avaiable and I've got an extra big chapter for you guys! I might not write any other chapters tomorrow, but I promise I'll at least try. Well, see you guys, hope you ejoy and keep the support coming!

Ps: if any of you would like to give a review, I'd apreciate the constructive citicism. Thank you!

…

"Commander Shepard of the Alliance, we hereby declare you to officially belong to the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Citadel. Congratulations. Now, this meeting of the Council is adjourned!"-the asari councilor Tevos said as she backed away with the other two councilors into their private chambers.

Shepard was extremely uplifted. He had not only just become the first human Spectre, but he had been assigned to take down a threat to the galaxy in under a day. 'Time for some payback, Saren you ass.'- he thought, grinning inwards at the chance he'd been given to get justice for all of the innocents back on Eden Prime.

He turned back to see Kaidan and Tali standing there, like he knew they would be. Kaidan had a bit of lawyering expertise, from his early years before the Alliance. Shortly after the incident at Jump Zero, he'd spent some time exploring different career paths before the Alliance recruited him into service in a special biotic and special forces training facility in Rio. Ironically, that's where he'd met Shepard, and he had later found out that Corporal Williams, now promoted to Gunnery Chief aboard the Normandy, had also been stationed there during training. The Commander felt that having someone even a bit versed in the world of interstellar law would come in handy in this situation.

As for Tali, Shepard had felt it to be appropriate that she was there. After all, he owed her the evidence that had gotten him the biggest promotion in his life and a chance to stop a galactic scaled threat. Besides, after his talk with her on the way to the embassy and, posteriorly, to the Citadel tower, he had found it rather ironical that a quarian, a species banned from the Citadel's rule, was the one that had found the evidence that would save it. Chuckling at the thought, and noticing the young woman's enthusiasm in being a part of his mission and crew, he decided that bringing her along was probably for the best. Besides, maybe the Council would better trust someone whose altruism is evident, as is with a quarian on her Pilgrimage.

"Yup,"-Shepard thought, smiling at both of his companions as he headed towards, and then past them-"you don't get much more altruistic than that. I wonder how it even works? There's so much about my new crew I don't know. Maybe I can talk to them later?"

As he got near Anderson, he interrupted his line of thought to address the veteran. This certainly was a proud day for humanity.

"Good job Shepard. What you've just accomplished here is something humanity has been struggling with for decades. I just wanted you to know that you have the Alliance's, and all of mankind's support behind you."-Anderson said, staring meaningfully at Shepard as he remembered his own attempt at becoming a Spectre many years in the past. Deciding the Commander deserved to be told about exactly what had happened, as well as being properly informed about Saren's methods and, he then added-"I need to speak with you later, in private. Away from the curious eyes and hears around this damn tower. Too many politicians and con-men. Meet me outside, by the Normandy's docking bay. I'll be waiting."

"Thank you sir."- the Commander said. No longer being able to maintain his military cool, he flashed Anderson a contented smile as he saluted.-"But I want you to know sir, it's been an honor working with you."

Anderson smiled back at the closest thing he had to a son, and replied:

"You too, Shepard. Now go out there and give them hell. You were born to do this."

…

Garrus Vakarian was having a hard time adapting to the Normandy. As soon as Shepard had reached the human embassy, he had told Garrus where to find the ship and how to get there. He had also told the turian to pick up anything he might find necessary quicly, has they would probably be making an hasty departure as soon as Shepard's meeting with the Council was over.

It had been a constant shitstorm since then. First, the Normandy's crew refused to let him in, stating they didn't trust any turian aboard their ship. However, before Garrus had the time to point out there had already _been_ a turian on their ship, and that the only reason the Normandy existed was because of an allegiance between humans and turians, Captain Anderson had radioed some human named Pressley and, after a series of confirmations and suspicious looks, he had been let inside the ship.

"Geez, if they get this worked up about a turian, I can only imagine what will happen when they see Wrex. Well, if things do turn out for the worst, at least he has blood rage to regenerate."-he thought, his wise cracking attitude already bringing forth an image of the bulky krogan getting shot at, only pissing him off even further while he went berserk. He didn't like Wrex, but he recognized that if there was some alien he wanted to be with in a fight, the krogan sure as hell would come first on the list. Well, apart from Shepard, at least.

By the time he had gotten to the Normandy's cafeteria, he had found that there was no dextro food. Pparently, since Nihlus had died, everyone had just conveniently gotten rid of all dextro supplies on the ship.

"Oh, the quarian is going to _looove_ this"-he thought, thinking of his new squadmate and of her ridiculous needs. He still hadn't wraped his head around why the Commander had recruited her. She had no combat experience, they had no idea if she was as skilled against the geth has he claimed, and she was a _quarian._ She could die of virtually anything outside of her suit! She would be needy, always complaining about special items and requisites she'd need to survive, when if her species hadn't even invented the geth, they wouldn't be in this mess in the first place!

Still, he was ready to keep an open mind about the individual. Maybe her thieving skills would come in handy. Everyone at C-sec was told they were pretty good thieves, so maybe she was as technically skilled as she claimed to be. And she didn't seem to be too much of a bad person from what he'd seen, but he still feared she might betray them. Maybe it was all a part of a scheme to steal the Normandy's plans for her Pilmgrimage!

He sighed, and then thought to himself: 'Well, at least the krogan is too dumb to just outright play us. I'll have to keep an eye on my dextro counterpart though."

Moving along, he had hurried to his apartment and, after gathering enough supplies and packing a few weapons mods, he ran back to his old C-sec boss' office. When he arrived, he burst through the front door, threw him his badge, ID card and gun and loudly proclaimed something he meant to do for a very, very long time:

"I quit this shitty job!"

…

Wrex was not happy. He had gotten a long boring speech about 'integrity' and 'dignity' by Shepard after killing Fist, and he'd been dispensed from duty as soon as the group neared the Citadel tower. 'A krogan shouldn't be in the Council chambers' Udina had said, 'he might try to harm the Councilors!'. At that point, the only thing that had kept Wrex from lashing out had been Shepard's firm, unflinching stare.

After that, Wrex decided to spend some time cutting off loose ends. A few mercs he'd threatened, a few debts to pay, and of course, for a new, big mission, a newer, even _bigger_ shotgun. He'd swipe the smug look of that turian with a single flash of this bad boy. Or so he thought. He knew the quarian they'd rescued a while back had something that packed quite a punch. Maybe he could find a way to coherse her into letting him in on her mods. Or he could just take them, as long as she didn't tell and Shepard didn't know. But even though he was krogan, and valued strength and courage, he failed to see where the courage and strength would be in taking a shotgun from a quarian who hadn't even done true battle before, so he quickly gave up on the idea.

Instead, he went out looking for Garrus. If the turian was going to come along with them for the next few weeks, or maybe even months of mission, then he might as well teach him a few things about shooting. Seven hundred years had given Wrex plenty of time to learn how to shoot pretty much anything, except for those small, horrible sniper rifles. Still, he'd mop the floor with Vakarian's lower rear plates any day.

"Hehehe, this is gonna be fun…"

…

Tali was amazed at what she saw. The Normandy's design was like nothing she'd ever seen in her whole life. It was just so… _different_ from everything in the flotilla! The sleek design, the quadruple tail wings, the powerful engines… being a tech expert, this was as good as it could get.

"Admiring the ship, hey?"

She turned back to watch Shepard arriving with a hard, metal case in his hands. She was looking for a response when he handed her the case.

"Here, I got this for you."-he said with a polite smile. She took the case and opened it. She looked in awe as she found a stock of plutonium rounds for her shotgun and a new pistol. She quickly turned to him and asked:

"Why did you do this?"-he looked at her, giving her a confused look. She noticed how, even though she never saw anyone's face in the flotilla nowadays, she could still recognize his expression from all the times she had seen it from her mother. She desperately missed those days.

"Well, I thought you'd like it. You know, I need my crew to be as well equipped as they can be, and you only had a standard model…Is that an offense to quarians? I'm sorry if it is, you're the first one I've ever talked to… Well, actually, you're the first quarian I've ever even _seen_."

"No, not that, you haven't offended me at all. And thank you for the worrying and all. But why? Why are you being nice to me? Aren't you afraid I'll just steal your things, or angry that we created the geth?"-she was having a hard time understanding this human. What was he up to? She felt a strange feeling in her gut as he spoke once again:

"Ah. That's what this is about."-he added, before staring at her blankly in silence for a few seconds. He then continued.-"You know what? I'll tell you a little story. I grew up in the midst of the Alliance. Both my parents were military. I'll spare you the details, but I'll tell you this: they fought batarians. A lot of batarians in fact. Whenever my parents went into battle, I was left behind. My only family, the only people that cared for me, were out there risking their lives against this unknown monster that I couldn't do anything to stop.

When I was too young, I didn't know a lot about what was really happening, so I just thought of mom and dad as heroes. But when my parents started to return with gunshot wounds I started to realize what was going on. I noticed that every time their squad went out, someone didn't come back. And I was scared. It didn't help when they showed me an image of an actual batarian, which I saw as a four eyed beast trying to kill everyone." –he paused a little bit afterwards, turned his back to her and stared blankly into the beautiful firmament beyond the reach of the Citadel arms. He then continued his story:

"For a long time after that, I hated the batarians. A lot of things happened… Some of them I'm not yet comfortable talking about. But one day, after I'd joined the Alliance, I was on shore leave with a few very close friends, on a human colony called Elysium. That was the day of the Skillyan Blitz. The biggest batarian raider armada ever seen. The slavers butchered everyone they came across. I lost many good friends that day."-he said in a sad tone. Tali could feel the emotion on his voice, and knew he wasn't faking it. She didn't know how she knew, she just did. Suddenly, a feeling of enormous empathy overflowed her, and she thought it right to say something.

"I'm so sorry, Shepard. It must have been hard."-she felt stupid has soon as she had said it. How was this supposed to make him feel better? But surprisingly, he turned back to her, not with anger, or depression, but with a simple, sad smile on his face.

"Don't be. You weren't there. Besides, I get the feeling your life is harder than mine, if what I read about your flotilla is true. I've actually been curious to talk with you about that, but we'll leave that for later.

So where was I? Elisyum, right? Well, believe it or not, I'm one of the few survivors of my squad. Guess it's a family curse…"-she noticed his words were not intentional, so she didn't inquire about what he meant. Still, he noticed her slight unease in her body language and quicly added-"Sorry, I didn't mean to circumspect. Anyway, remember me saying they were butchering everyone? Well, I meant it. After the initial assault, the raiders filled the streets, killing every civilian they could find. I lost a third of my squad to a couple of airships that were on the original attack, but the rest of us managed to get away and hide in a house on the outskirts of the colony.

You can imagine our surprise when, as we searched the house, we were attacked by a batarian. He came at me with a knife, but before he could get me, a member of my squad… jumped in front of the blade. She saved my life right then and there. She'd live the injury, but I was just so… pissed. So I lunged at him. But before I could kill the batarian, a large group of kids came into the room. Asari, human, turian, batarian, even a vorcha, they all come into the room and start screaming at us, telling us not to hurt him.

Turns out, we had stepped into an orphanage. The batarian was a teacher there. He'd thought we were human pillagers and attacked us while the children ran away. One of the kids had gone back, and the others followed him. I had been _this_ close…-he said, doing a pinching movement with his fingers-… to killing an innocent man. But I still couldn't trust a batarian. Not after my previous experiences with them. I just couldn't be there, with him, with that monster. And people were still dying outside, so I took action. I took a large part of my squad, and left the rest guarding the kids and my injured squad mate."

"I'm glad to hear it all went alright. It wasn't your fault your friend got hurt. And everything turned out for the best, right?"-Tali said as she gave him a hopeful smile. She knew deep down he wouldn't be telling her this story if there wasn't more to it.

"For a while, yes. It took us a while to get to our destination, a nearby police station. There was a weapon cache in the cellar, ripe for picking. We figured that if the guns were still there, the batarians hadn't gotten to the neighborhood yet, so we grabbed a bunch of assault rifles and took up vantage points. Sure enough, a large group of them, with a bunch of chained humans and the occasional asari, came through about an hour later. We killed the slavers in a surprise attack. Didn't lose a single civilian."

"What about your squad?"-Tali asked, a sense of dread filling her, as she already knew the answer.

"I lost two men. Corporal Kyle, and my best friend, Ramirez. Ha, that Ramirez sure was a pain sometimes, but you could count on him to do anything. Took half of the batarians by himself while the rest of us secured the civilians. And then he got hit with a stray bullet, straight through his throat. Drowned in his own blood in a minute."-Shepard's face had turned in to a grim, depressed version of his usual, cheerful look. She couldn't even imagine what it was like to lose someone under your command, especially a friend.

"Shepard… I don't know what to say…"

"It's ok. We all knew what we had signed up for when we joined the military. He died a hero. And after we'd secured the civilians, we carried his body back to the orphanage to get him a proper burial. As we approached the building, something felt wrong. No one had come out to greet us. I then heard a single shot, and ran into the complex. But it was too late.

They'd killed everyone. Every kid, all the marines, everyone. There were so many batarian corpses… for every marine dead, they must have killed five or six slavers. But even that wasn't enough. Some kids were hugging, even in death. They'd been executed while comforting each others. They didn't care what species they were, they cared that they were children. My injured friend's corpse, still holding on to a locket I'd given her. Then I found the teachers corpse. He had three bullets on his back, and was facing a door. There were a few more corpses up ahead. He'd tried to shield the kids and the marines from the bullets with his own body while they ran! AND I THOUGHT HE WAS A MONSTER! THEY WERE ALL DEAD BECAUSE OF ME!"-Shepard screamed, tears now running down his face, remembering every detail, every child's face, every marine's dogtag. He didn't want her to see him like that, but she was comprehensive. She came near him, and to his surprise, hugged him.

"It's okay. You're going to be okay. It wasn't your fault… you couldn't have stopped them Shepard…"

He was just stunned there for what felt like hours. Then, he raised his arms and hugged her back. After a while, they finally let go and he continued to talk:

"Thank you. I'm sorry you had to see me like that. That day… that day will haunt me to the day I die. But it was also the day I changed. I've never judged anyone for their species ever since. Not after seeing what those kids had done. Not after I saw what had happened to that batarian teacher. And it taught me about the horrors of war.

Right then and there, I felt an urge to kill every slaver I could find. I'd lost everyone I cared about except my mother to those slavers. It was time they paid. Only half of my squad was left, and there was no way they could survive a full on assault on the batarian forces. So I told them to take the civilians, go back to the police station, and hide. Then I ran into the middle of town.

I don't remember much of what happened next. Most of it is blurry. I remember the smell of death and blood everywhere I went. But not my blood. Never my blood. I shot more bullets that day than in all of my career. When my rifle jammed, I pistol wiped them. Until eventually reinforcements arrived and took back the colony. Apparently, my killing spree had stopped the batarians from reaching a radio tower, and some of my teammates had managed to get to it and send a distress call.

They say I killed more than two thousand batarians that day. They called me a hero. I say I killed more than two thousand monsters that day. But they were also people. They had wives, kids. I had to stop them, stop the bloodshed, but I still remember how I felt when I lost people that were dear to me. I'm no hero, Tali. I'm just a murderer for the right reasons."

Tali looked at him as he just stood there. She had no idea what to say. She just looked at him until he turned his eyes directly onto hers. Then he spoke again:

"I'm being nice to you because I learned that even batarians can be nice. That's why I'm usually a friendly guy to all species. Not one of us, not a single _one_ , is better than the others. I learned that the hard way. So I couldn't give less of a crap about your people's reputation. I judge you for your character. And if I can grow to like and respect a batarian, I can certainly grow to like and respect you. And up until now, I have only respect for your actions."

After that, he just turned away from her and went into the ships docking tube. She knew, right then and there, she would always respect the man that she had just talked to. He wasn't playing her, or trying to get an angle. He just was that way, and Tali felt an admiration and empathy towards him that she hadn't felt ever before. She liked the _human_ … No, she liked _Shepard_ already.

But he wasn't quite done yet. Before reaching the airlock, he still turned back and said:

"You're one of the few people I've ever told this story. Thank you for listening. If you need something, or have a problem with the ship, just let me know. And if you want to lighten up after this story, ask for engineer Adams in the lower deck. He'll fill you in on the Tantalus core that keeps this baby running. He's almost as good a tech freak has me."-he said with a smile before entering the ship's airlock.

'Wait, he's a tech expert?!', Tali thought to herself, barely holding her emotions together after his story and knowledge of his trust on her.

'I like him already.'


	8. One last day

Authors Note: Hey people, how's it going? It's me, the author, here to say hello again! I wanted to apologize not getting two chapters out last weekend, but I was just really, really busy with my nephew's birthday. So instead, I gave you guys an extra big chapter! Hurray!

But there's something that's sort of been bothering me for quite awhile actually… I have no idea if the people that are reading this actually like it. I mean, seriously, I have no idea if I'm writing a good story here, if you'd like a bit more action, maybe some romance, drama, if the characters are relatable… I dunno.

So next time you click on my story, why not leave a small review? It doesn't have to be big, or anything, I'd just like to know what you guys think of the story, because seriously, the lack of feedback IS KILLING ME.

So, thank you all again for reading this, and I hope you enjoy, or keep enjoying, my little pet project, Mass Effect: To My Heart's Content.

…

"So, oh great Commander Shepard, first human Spectre, what's your plan to catch this bastard?"-Kaiden Alenko was grinning at Shepard while he talked. They'd just celebrated his promotion in his quarters with a couple of beers, the 'drink of my people', as the staff lieutenant called it. After reminiscing about the good old times when they were still rookies, the now Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams walked in on their fun little reunion to thank Shepard again for giving her a chance on the Normandy. After that, she'd found out the three of them had all attended the same training facility, back in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. They had all laughed at their own early day stories, from Ashley's friend Donkey hitting on her, to the time Shepard had accidentally shot a live round into the sky during a combat drill and it ended up falling on a tripmine in the enemy team's ammo cache. Now however, it seemed like it was time to get back to the mission details.

"Hell, Kaiden, I have no clue whatsoever. The bastard could be on the other end of the Terminus Systems for all I know. But Anderson gave me a few leads before we took off, and I reckon if we can take down Saren's operations, he'll eventually have to show up."- it still hurt Shepard to know that his Commanding Officer, and most of all, his friend, had been forced to resign so that he could get a chance to go after the turian Spectre, but Shepard had managed to turn that anger and indignation into determination towards their ultimate goal: stopping Saren and the Reapers.

"Well Skipper, any ideas where to start? We can't just run head first into a small lead and waste time while Saren gathers his strength. Preferably a place full of geth, I've been lingering to shoot something since Eden Prime."-Ashley Williams had just been probed, examined and attended by about every damn psychiatrist in the Citadel, and she was itching for a chance to stop feeling useless and getting back to saving the galaxy.

Shepard shook his head in her direction in feigned disapproval, and then proceeded:

"You know, I've shot more things here on the Citadel than I would care to even think about. Why on Earth there were so many thugs, crooks and mercenaries around the Wards, and why suddenly they all picked me to mess with, I may never guess. Would it really be that bad to get assigned to a sunny beach on an uncharted planet one of these days?"

Alenko and Williams stared deeply into his eyes as he spoke, and there was an awkward moment of silence after he'd finished. But after that, all three of them erupted into laughter, tears of utter joy running through their eyes and onto their cheeks.

"Yo-you… resting on a sunny beach? HAHAhaha…"-Alenko was now completely bent over his own belly, clutching his stomach as he laughed his guts out.

"What's… so… funny?"-Shepard managed to ask between laughter, the irony that overflowed from his words almost palpable.

"Are you kidding me? Nothing to explode, hack, shoot, fight or shout at? You'd be bored in minutes!"-Ashley hadn't known the Commander for very long, but she had read his dossier and it was clear he wasn't the kind of man who would just sit down while there was unfinished business. Especially if it was the 'galactic threat' kind of business.

"Well then, the next time they give us shore leave, I'll happily tell Alliance Command that we don't want it!"

"No offense, sir, but bite me. No one is keeping me away from some quality time with my family after this is done."

Kaiden took the opportunity the other two had created while they chatted to get up, still giggling at the thought of a middle aged Shepard just lying on a beach, holding a beer in one hand and an assault rifle in the other. He reached for the fridge and pulled out three more drinks, and turned to Williams as he put them down on the table:

"Well then, guess we just have to save everyone alive so we can all enjoy some down time. Suggestions?"

"Actually, I've already chosen where we're headed. Anderson told me he had news about a colony that was being attacked by geth, so I told Joker to set a course as fast as he could. Guess it's back to saving helpless colonists for us, heh?"

"God forbid, I'm having the biggest déjà vu ever. So, what's the name of this colony?"-Ashley felt a shiver down her spine as she thought about having to relive the events of Eden Prime again. Finally, after taking a large gulp from his can of beer, he turned to her and dramatically answered her question:

"Zhu's Hope."

…

Garrus was checking out the Normandy's systems when they jumped into FTL towards the relay. After the initial burst of speed, he had expected to be slightly shaken as the ships gravity systems kicked in. But nothing happened. Curious, he checked the nearest console to see what had just happened. Apparently, the Normandy had been retrofitted with special magnetic devices that not only made the hull sturdier and sleek, in combination with the alloy the ship's innermost sections were made, would make the floor bend slightly whenever there was a dramatic change in speed, as to reduce the crew's discomfort to a bare minimum when the ship accelerated or decelerated.

He took this in proudly when he found out that the idea had been proposed by the turian Hierarchy, as to make long term journeys more pleasant towards other species. For turians like him, however, these small details weighed a lot: what other species took for comfort, turians in general disapproved. It was thought among the military that if you were comfortable, you wouldn't be on edge if an attack occurred and so turian ships were usually adapted and built not to make living on them easier, but for maximum space and assets efficiency aboard the vessel.

The fact that the Hierarchy had thought outside the box for this ship meant that they were finally ready to make concessions and work with other species on a more mundane basis. This, in turn, reminded Garrus of his father's ideals, that all species should work together and do things right for everyone, or not to do them at all. While he agreed with his parent about the first part of his mantra, he felt as if the old C-Sec agent was being deliberately dull on the "doing things right" part. What did that mean? Why should it matter how he did things, as long as he got the job done? They'd fought about it many times before, and it was one of the reasons Garrus and his father didn't get along, and rarely talked anymore.

"But enough thinking of dad."-Garrus whispered to himself.-"I'm travelling with the first human Spectre on a mission to save the galaxy and clean the name of turians everywhere from Saren's dirty work. No rules, no red tape, just me, my squad, and a lot of dead geth ahead of us."-he chuckled at the thought of fighting the machines that had for so long haunted whatever it was that was beyond the Perseus Veil. A worthy enemy, no doubt.

"What are you doing here, _turian?_ "- someone grunted behind him, interrupting Garrus' thoughts, his words blatantly exposing his dislike for the turian race. He turned around, expecting to see Wrex's ugly mug behind him, but all he found was a human in an officer uniform looking at him distrustfully.

"Checking the Normandy's systems out. And might you be?"- Garrus expected this to be some kind of practical human joke on the new alien in the crew, but the man in front of him gave him a look that conveyed the pure repulsion he felt for him.

"I told the Commander not to trust you aliens. My name is Pressley, but you can call me Navigator Pressley, and I'm Shepard's second in command. I'll be keeping a close eye on you from now on. So tell me, who were you relaying the information to? What secrets did you find out, _turian?_ "

Garrus' sighed as he realized it was going to be one of _those_ humans. So he decided to get it over with quickly and turned over to the officer.

"Look, Pressley, let's get this straight. I've handled your type more things than I can count back on C-Sec, so there's no point in trying to intimidate me. Why don't you just run along and mind your own business, which I have no interest in whatsoever, and let me handle mine?"

Pressley's stare could have melted **two** icebergs.

"Really? You've seen Alliance Officers running around the Citadel lately? Maybe it was because there's a rogue turian trying to kill everyone in the Citadel and the humans are the only ones willing to act upon it! You aliens just want to stand back and watch and then collect all the credit!"

Garrus inhaled deeply, disgusted by the fact that Pressley was willing to judge the entire turian race for what Saren had done.

"Listen, xenophobic punk, I know all about you. Let me guess, daddy or grandpa participated in the First Contact War? You left a family behind and are now hoping to make everyone proud? Mistrust us because we're different? I said it once, and I'll say it again: I DON'T CARE. This mission is far too important for me to get into trouble over you, so just get back to your job and leave me alone. Heck, if it makes you more comfortable, I'll even set up shop in the cargo hold. Now, if you'll excuse me…"

He then left the CIC, nodding at the Alliance Officer that took his station and leaving an angry, speechless Pressley behind. He headed to the lower deck, to check his locker and prep for the next mission. As the elevator reached its destination, Garrus tried to take his mind off things and couldn't help but see a giant tank standing right there in the room. He studied it closely, moving around it and checking out its systems. Kinetic barriers, armored plating, double padded wheels… and then his eyes rested on _it._

"Holy…"-he let out in a small whisper as he observed the giant gun on top of the Mako. That thing looked like it could shoot pellets the size of his hand. He climbed on top of the tank to check it out, and after making sure no one was around, he stepped inside for a quick look. He was careful not to turn the engine on, and quickly got the guns online just to check the systems. But has he did, something caught his eye. The giant gun, it was… tilting. Yes, now he was sure, the giant gun tilted a bit to the left, just a small, imperceptible bit, but Garrus had somehow still noticed it. And that made him uncomfortable. The gun wasn't at 100% capability.

Suddenly, he was overtaken by a huge wave of resolve, of impulse. He felt like it was his job to get that gun to its peak. He had to! And so, he let go of any other thoughts, and focused solely on this urge of his.

The urge to calibrate.

…

"Keelah, how powerful is this thing?!"- Tali exclamated as she observed the ships FTL system by Engineer Adams' post in the Normandy's lower deck. It was simply amazing! She was in front of the most advanced system in the galaxy, onboard the finest ship in Council space! Her friends back home wouldn't believe when she told them…

"Home..."

Even though she was excited about all this, Tali'Zorah desperately missed her home. Her small cubicle in the Rayya, the sleepovers at her friends' houses, Auntie Ran… and father.

"I wonder what he'd say if he knew where I was…"- Tali grimly chuckled at the thought of her father confronting her on her choice of goals during her Pilgrimage, knowing fully well he would not approve of her work with other species.-"Maybe he'd change his mind after I showed him this tech…"

"It is pretty impressive, isn't it?"- a voice from behind startled her and she jumped a little bit before hastily turning around to meet her interpellator

Shepard was standing there, a small smile on his face as he looked directly at her. She was scared at first, then angry that he'd snuck up on her like that, and then embarrassed over her reaction. Seeing how she was taking her time coming up with an answer, Shepard talked first to lighten the mood:

"Checking out the Tantalus drive core, heh? Real powerhouse that is. Throw in a few FBA couplings, a flux capacitor and a 1.21 gigawatt charge and the girl is ready to go"-he said, laughing at her when he was over. She looked at him quizzically, before managing a small, cute giggle that she instantly regretted after hearing it in her masks' metallic tone. However, Shepard just kept smiling at her before asking:

"What's so funny to you, miss? Was it something I said?"

She couldn't manage to hold another small grin in, and she thanked her visor for one of the first times as she started to feel her cheeks getting warmer.

"Well, Commander, with all due respect… this drive core as no flux capacitators… and 1.21 gigawatts would hardly even get us out off a telluric planet's orbit…"

"Hehe, well I guess you're right. It does seem like there are no flux capacitators around here. We should probably get that fixed… Do you have any spare plutonium just lying around?"

Tali genuinely laughed at the serious face Shepard made while he was talking. It was clear to her that he was making a joke; after all, why would they need plutonium when they already had the mass effect drive? Curious as to what he was doing, she decided to ask:

"Shepard… why are you joking around?"

He looked at her briefly with a quirky look before answering:

"I just felt like introducing you to some of the finest quotes of my people's history. Why do you ask?"

"Well… you're being so funny and acting casual… I didn't think that… you know…"

"A commanding officer could be as polite, fantastic and charm full as me and still get along with his crew? You'd be surprised. Besides, you're not officially part of the crew. You're technically here as a favor to the galaxy, since Spectres choose their own associates. So no need for military bravado and code between you and me. For now, I'm just interested in getting along with a co-worker. Of course, that is, if I'm not bothering you or anything…"- he took a step back while finishing his sentence, not quite sure how she would react

Tali noticed this and felt a sudden urge to tell him it was ok, that she wanted them to get along. Instead she said in a sudden fast pace:

"No, no, it doesn't bother me at all… It's just that I'm not used to talking with other people and it might be reckless if I say something out of hand, because you're still my commanding officer, which is completely ok with me, and maybe I'd accidentally offend you or the crew and.. and…"-she stopped when she noticed she was fidgeting her hands and talking too fast for even herself to understand what she was saying. She expected John to waltz out of the room, but as she looked back up, Shepard still stood there, staring at her nervous, embarrassed form with a look on his eyes that screamed that everything was alright.

"Tali, it's ok. You're free to speak to me about anything if you ever need a friend on this ship."

"Yes, I… I'd like that. Thank you… Shepard."

"Anytime Tali."

Shepard turned to leave and headed towards the exit that led to the cargo bay, but before he went through the doors, he turned around, just as dramatically as he had done it before by the airlock, a concerned look on his face, and told her:

"Oh, I almost forgot. I've got you a new suit and armor. I noticed your old one is pretty badly damaged. I managed to sneak you in a new omni-tool to. It's only a Silaris model, but it was the best I could get on such short notice. Also, when you're ready, I'd like to talk with you before we reach our destination."

"Why's that?"

"We're going to be fighting geth."-he said, looking her in the eyes with a smile, her dazzling, silver eyes, before finishing.-"And I want you down there with me."


	9. The Road to Hope, Part 1

…

"Alright team! Listen up!"-Shepard shouted at the members of the ground team.-" We're about to go in hot into enemy controlled territory with no knowledge whatsoever of who or what will be waiting for us. All we do know is that there'll be geth involved! So, I've decided to take Tali and Kaiden with me since they're our best bet against whatever's waiting for us out 'll be team Normandy. In case I'm totally mistaken, and we end up not needing tech on this mission, I'm assigning the rest of you to protecting the ship and readying the Mako for ground support. As of now, you're team Mako. Are there any questions?"

"Hmph, when do we start shooting?"- Wrex said, his thundering krogan voice revealing his little patience and unmistakable desire for violence.

"Not soon enough, Wrex. Now, team Normandy, ready up, we're leaving in ten minutes. Move!"

…

"Are you with the Alliance?"- the man in front of Shepard asked. He looked nervous, constantly checking his surroundings, as if he felt watched, a sense of impending danger looming over him. He knew it was of no use; the geth had those machines, those stalkers, with them, and if they were around he'd probably be dead before he knew it.

"Yes, I am. I'm Commander Shepard, and I'm here to assist you. And who might you be?"

"There's no time for that, you have to hurry, Fai Dan wants to meet you. You have to go, now!"- did they not understand the danger they were in? Did they not realize how strong the geth were, how invincible? They could be dead at any given moment!

"Calm down. You're safe with us. Just tell me, who's Fai Dan? Does he have any intel on the geth?"

"No, no, nononono, you don't understand, Fai Dan needs to meet you before they attack again. He's our leader, and he needs support before the geth push again! Please, just hurry!"-he could feel the geth's scopes aiming at his head, waiting to line up for the perfect kill, the perfect shot…

"Alright, take me there. You'll be safe with us, I promise."

"You can't make that promise now. No one can. Up the stairs, past the freighter. And Gods help us all."- it felt right to him that these were his last words, words of warning, words that might help save the others. He felt something scratching, and a sudden itch on the back of his brain, which took hold of him in time to warn him about the geth. Specifically, about the rocket that had just been shot at him.

His last thoughts went out to his ancestral master, and he acknowledged that he had failed. But at the least the Thorian might yet be saved.

…

Shepard couldn't tell what had happened. He couldn't explain why Kaiden was on the floor helping a man with half of his back missing. He couldn't tell why Tali was using her omni-tool to overload something in front of him. He didn't know why, or how, but in a matter of seconds after hearing the characteristic click of a shotgun, he had turned back and jumped away from the colonist, grabbing both of his teammates in the process. After that, he couldn't remember when he'd gotten up and started shooting at the geth and yelling orders, when his instinct had gotten the best of him and made him fight for his own survival.

He shot a burst of polonium rounds from his shotgun into a geth shield, taking it out immediately. Quickly switching to his pistol, he threw a grenade as he jumped into cover behind a few crates. By now, Tali had hacked the geth the furthest away from them, and the machine had started picking off his buddies one by one. Kaiden had given up on the other man, and rushed to the aid of the team in a fit of rage and biotics. He threw two geth units back, and Shepard seized the opportunity by quickly activating the marksman mod on his pistol and filling the two units with bullets before they could get back on their feet.

"Tali, get behind me! Alenko, covering fire!"

Shepard then surrounded himself in a barrier of pure biotic power, and rushed the three remaining geth units with his shotgun. The first unit hid behind cover before Shepard had a clear shot, so as the Commander ran past its cover, he jerked his upper torso just enough to get a good shot at the geth. This, however, meant he lost momentum, and as he rushed towards the second unit, that was standing in the middle of the hallway they were fighting in, he was shot by a red laser that instantly took his shields down to a third of their capability. Without any time to think, Shepard decided to go on the aggressive and rammed the second geth unit, using its boy as a shield against other lasers coming in his direction. He shot the geth in what would be its stomach if it had one, and white, gooping liquid flowed from within the machine, but before he could take cover, he saw that the third unit was about to use the Carnage version of his shotgun on him, effectively bypassing Shepard's geth protection and blowing him up for good. Without time to spare, Shepard threw the geth he had rammed onto the one about to shoot him, and as the rocket hit the flying body at point blank range of its sender, the third and last geth unit was blown to smithereens.

However, the Commander was also thrown back, his already fluttering shields now fully depleted. Looking up as he was sent flying back, he could see two more geth looking at him. But something was wrong. These geth weren't carrying any weapons, and they were on the walls. He hit the floor hard, getting the air knocked out straight out of his lungs, and didn't have time to react as he saw one of the geth's eye charge up and glow red.

'Fuck.'

Suddenly, both of the geth detached from the wall and started floating up into the ceiling. Before John knew it, Tali was rushing them with her shotgun and taking them both out swiftly as they were crippled in this way. She then turned around to face him, and Shepard felt an hand on his shoulder as she approached him. Kaiden Alenko was there, looking at him as if he'd grown a third head all of the sudden. He wondered if Kaiden was angry at him.

"What the hell were you thinking Shepard?! Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"- yes, he was definitely angry.

"Keelah, Shepard, are you alright? Did they manage to hit you? Do you need medi-gel, I've got some right here… keelah, what were you thinking, you scared us!"- at least Tali showed her concern in a slightly less aggressive way. He laughed at his own thoughts, only a few seconds after he'd been in life danger. He picked himself up, dusted himself off, and turned to the rest of his team with a small grin across his face:

"I wasn't thinking. All I knew was that if I didn't take those geth out fast, they might attack us with those carnage rockets again. So I acted. Sorry if I made you both worry, hehe."

Alenko just stood there, staring deeply into him. Tali still had her omni-tool ready to dispense medi-gel if need be, but Shepard reassured he was just fine in a single gesture.

"After this is done, you and me, we're going to have a long talk about this crazy shit you pull out. We're a team, Shepard. Don't just throw your life away."- Kaiden looked and acted serious, but Shepard knew he was just worried.

"Geez, could have sworn I was the commander here. Don't worry Alenko, I don't intend to die today."- he took a deep breath and glanced over at the dead body of the colonist who had approached them earlier.- "Then again, he probably didn't either…"

"Real shame, that one. Could have gotten us to the colony, and to this Fai Dan guy he was talking about. Heck, maybe when we get there, there won't be anyone left to save."

"Then let's stop worrying and let's start moving! Those people will be helpless against the geth! We have no time to spare!"- Shepard felt a hand on his shoulder and three fingers gripping it.

"No, Shepard. These colonists are everything but helpless. These people have had their homes taken from them, their families killed, everything gone. But for as long as they stand, the colony will live. This is their home, and they will fight to the death to protect it from the geth."

Shepard was taken aback by her sudden emotional outburst. How could he have been so blind? He'd failed to see the similarities between these colonists and Tali's own people: only a small group of people left, driven from their homes by the geth, but still fighting. Never giving up. Shepard admired that in the quarians, and he admired Tali's straight forwardness.

"Tali… if you need to talk about something… me and Kaiden are here for you. You know that, right?"

A second went by without a word being said. What was she feeling, he wondered. Indignation at his assumption? Anger at a misunderstood insinuation? Confusion as to what he meant?

"Shepard, thank you but… I'm fine, really. We don't have time for me whining and those colonists still need help. We should go."

He looked at her with the most concerned expression she'd ever seen.

"Tali…"

"Please, Shepard. Let's just… go. Please."

She stared back at him, her eyes pleading him not to press further on the matter. To her satisfaction, he promptly respected her wishes, and followed her up a set of stairs, and into the entrance of the colony of Zhu's Hope.

…

"Mako team, do you read?"- Shepard's voice came through the communicator, static slightly clouding up his voice.

"Garrus here, I'm reading you Shepard. There's some sort of interference, be carefull not to break up."-Wrex and Ashley closed in to listen to the conversation. They'd been sitting in the cargo hold for about half an hour, so they were dying for some news.

"Copy that Garrus. The geth presence here is strong, but nothing overwhelming. However, I would request you to stay sharp and monitor the Normandy. Don't trust scans, we have confirmation that they are using jammers. If you see them, shoot'em. Got it?"-the Commander sounded worried, or was it just the interference? Garrus couldn't tell.

"Roger that, Commander. Those machines won't even know what hit'em."-Garrus tried to make his confidence evident in his words, but truth be told, he was anxious to fight a foe so amazingly different from anything else as the geth.

"And Garrus?"-Shepard's voice was getting lower, the interference must have been getting stronger.

"Yes, sir?"

"Be careful out there."

"Will do, Shepard."

After that, only static.

…

 _One hour later, Zhu's hope tunnels_

"That's the last of them."-Kaiden said, walking away from the enemy corpse he had just filled to the brim with bullets.-"What now?"

"We take down this jammer, report back to Fai Dan, and set out to the ExoGeni headquarters to find out what the hell Saren was looking for in this ass-end of nowhere."-Shepard replied, walking over to his newest kill to inspect the body.-"Why the hell would the krogan be helping him? It doesn't add up."

"They're probably mercs like Wrex, sent here to stop you from reaching whatever it was that Saren found here."-Tali added, swiping the blood from her shotgun and setting her omni-tool back to passive mode.

"But what could Saren offer the krogan that he couldn't offer another species? Why are we not fighting asari commandos, or salarian mercs, or humans? Why the lack of other races amongst his ranks? And how can he afford to pay them if his Spectre status as been withdrawn?"

"We'll think about it later. Right now, let's just shoot this thing and get this over with. The sooner we get out of these tunnels, the better. Specially with that weird guy back there wandering through the halls. Talk about creepy."-Kaiden didn't want to admit, but he also felt rather uncomfortable in such tight quarters combat, in which Shepard and Tali excelled. That, coupled with some minor signs of claustrophobia, and Alenko just wanted to get the hell out of there. FAST.

"Do you think he'll be alright, Shepard? He looked and acted rather strangely…"-Tali asked, her genuine worry about a crazy man she'd just met coming as a surprise to Shepard. 'You never do cease to amaze, do you, miss nar Rayya?', he thought.

"Don't worry, Tali, we've cleared all varen and geth from these tunnel. If he got this far without us, he'll be fine. Besides, there's nothing we can do to help him if he doesn't want to be helped."-he tried to give her a reassuring smile, but he too was worried about the man. Not entirely about his safety, though, but also about his message about what it seemed to be that someone was controlling him through pain. 'What were you up to, you sly turian bastard?'

"I know, it's just, I don't feel well letting him just stay here unprotected."

"Wait a second. Protection? Tali, you're a flipping genius!"- Shepard said, as he smiled at her and Alenko and reached over to his ear to activate his intra-tympanum implant.-"Garrus, are you there?"

"Reading you loud and clear, Shepard, what's the situation?"- Garrus' voice carried a certain tone of defiance, not to Shepard, but to whoever even dared cause their team a problem.

"I need you to get the Mako and put your entire team into it. Get it to these coordinates ASAP."-he reached over to some active consoles and quickly hacked it with a single swoop from his omni-tool, gaining an impressed look from both Alenko and Tali, even though the latter's was harder to tell.-"I'm sending you the schematics to the building and a number of sub-levels you can take through these tunnels to get there. Once you get here, I want you to take Wrex to the underground and check a few krogan bodies before you set up defendable positions with Fai Dan, the colony's leader. Tell him I sent you. Your first priority is to keep the colonists alive, and keeping the Normandy safe. Roger that?"

"Yeah, on it Shepard. Getting the team ready right now."

"Thanks Garrus. And good luck."

"You too, Shepard."

…

"What is it about you that makes people think we enjoy being in harm's way?"- Tali said to Shepard as he talked with a colonist by the name of Gavin Hossle. Mister Hossle had approached the Commander after his conversation with the two leaders of his small group, Ethan Jeong and Juliana Baynham, requesting that he find a patch of data left behind at ExoGeni headquarters. They'd all managed to find a small, safe haven in one of the garages of the skyscraper, effectively avoiding the geth by hiding in the most obvious of places.

"I guess it's just a case of my reputation preceding me. Stick with me too long and you may find yourself famous for all the wrong reasons, Tali."-he heard her chuckle a bit, and smiled a bit at the small piece of innocence he'd managed to find in that geth infested hellhole.

"Great, like my father wouldn't dislike the idea of me in a human ship enough."-he looked at her curiously, trying to understand the meaning behind her words. She stared back defiantly-"You're not the only one with secrets, Commander…"

"Really? Well then, I'll just have to pry them out of you when we get back to the Normandy, now won't I?"- he said, giving her a devilish smile. Then he understood what he'd just blurted out. 'Oh crap, no. Please tell me I did NOT just say that. She's going to think I'm some sort of womanizer…', Shepard thought.- "I mean, if I'm not prying too much, that is, I mean, I'm sorry if I've stepped into something personal…"

Instead, Tali just lightly chuckled again, and gently, yet anxiously replied:

"No, that would be just fine by me, Shepard. It'll be nice to have someone to talk to."-he inwardly sighed in relief at her words.

"Good. We just have to save this world then. No pressure, right?"-the Commander said, turning towards the exit to the shelter and to Alenko, who'd been chatting up with a biotic ExoGeni security guard that had survived the attack.

"With you around? They never even stood a chance."


	10. The Road to Hope, Part 2

…

"You just always manage to put us in these wonderful situations, don't you Commander?"- Kaiden Alenko shouted over the loud sounds of guns firing and the characteristic noise of biotics.

"I'LL KILL EVERY ONE OF YOU! THEN, I'll RIP YOU APART JUST FOR THE SAKE OF IT!"- the enemy krogan shouted at them, wielding an impressive mix of a state of the art shotgun and exuberant biotics. He blasted successive shells at their cover, and Shepard ironically replied to Kaiden:

"Can we talk about this when we're not being attacked by a krogan biotic? If that's alright with the both of you, that is!"-Shepard suddenly rolled out of cover and behind a nearby pillar, unleashing a burst from his pistol into the krogan chest as he rolled. The krogan was left staggered for a second, before shaking it off with a loud roar of frustration and entering bloodrage.

With no time to spare, Shepard saw as the krogan ran towards the rest of his team and decided to act upon it. Tuning in with his innermost emotions, he created a mass efeect field around the enemy just as he was about to pounce on his allies, seemingly freezing him in time. Tali looked at Shepard, gratitude visible in her eyes, and Kaiden looked at Shepard with a mix of joyous surprise and utter disbelief.

"You can create a stasis field?! I thought only asari and specially trained units could pull that off!"-Kaiden said as Shepard approached them, his shotgun still trained on the immobile krogan. The Commander let a small grin reach his lips and turned to Alenko:

"I've been practicing a lot recently. You would not believe how intense Spectre training can be. Whenever I get some free time, I go test my powers in the cargo hold, usually after everyone else is out. I've been trying to pull another thing off too, but we'll leave that for later…"-he shifted his focus back to the krogan-"Get ready. Any second now."

They all raised their shotguns at point blank range. The krogan was about to have a very, very bad day.

…

Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau was checking the Normandy's stealth drive to see if it was still fully functional when he heard static coming out of the ship's communicator.

'That's strange…'-he thought, extending an arm out to the console that controlled it.- 'I didn't turn this thing on. Maybe Shepard accidentally forgot to switch his off?'

Suddenly, he got a terrible feeling about what was happening. He tried to hail the outer teams, but to no avail. So he decided to broadcast on a different signal, subtle, lighter and harder to be picked up by jammers. Unfortunately, this meant that the others probably wouldn't pick it up too.

He listened closely to the static. Nothing out of the ordinary occurred, but there was something… off about that static. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, when he heard a shift in the static's usual tone. Racing to enhance it, he tried multiple frequencies before hearing a message.

"Joker, open the fucking door now! They're everywhere!"-Garrus' voice came clear through the comms.-"Do you read me, Joker? Damn it, there's too many of them! Wrex, I need you to through them with your biotics. And someone get this freaking door open NOW!"

"Garrus? What the hell is going on?"

"Just open the damn door!"

Joker pressed a button and entered the code to the Normandy's airlock. A familiar sound came from the ships speakers, its V.I. beginning the decontamination process and asking everyone to stay still.

"Now is not the time for this Joker!"- he heard Ashley Williams say. He quickly cliqued the controls to override security protocol and the door behind his seat opened.

"What the hell happened out there? Was it the geth? Weren't you supposed to be helping the colonists?!"-Joker said as he got up and turned to team Mako. Garrus took a step forward before collapsing onto the floor, blood gushing from a wound on his arm before he stabilized it with medi-gel.-"Whoa, big guy, take it easy. Someone call doctor Chakwas now!"

"You don't understand, human."-Wrex replied in a steady voice, a few scars on his face quickly healing due to his krogan regeneration factor.-"They were the ones that put us into this mess."

"How did the geth get the jump on you?"-Joker asked as he helped get Garrus up and handed him to Williams, who had come out of the battle apparently unharmed.

"Not the geth."-Wrex mumbled in a low voice.-"It was every single one of those damn colonists."

…

"Joker! Come in, Joker! Do you read?"- Shepard called out as he watched a geth ship's arm being torn apart by a hangar door, sending it into and past the clouds that surrounded the compound and onto the surface of the planet Feros.

"Commander? Is that you? What the hell is going on?"- a troubled voice answered through the comm.

"Quickly Joker, get everyone on the ship combat ready and seal the Normandy's doors! Summon team Mako and tell them to get to safety, the colonists are highly hostile and are being controlled by an enemy force. I repeat, the colonists are hostile, get everyone out of Zhu's Hope now!"

A small, melancholic chuckle came through his earpiece.

"We know, commander. Garrus came around a few minutes ago, shaking that pole he's got up his ass and telling me to open the door. We're preparing an all out assault on the colonists as we speak."

Shepard took the information heavily. 'If they had gotten to the Normandy before team Mako…'. No, it wasn't the time for those thoughts. He needed to focus on the mission at hand, and most importantly, on keeping his trusted crew safe.

"Negative on that, Joker. Tell everyone to divide into two groups, one guarding the cargo hold and another holding down the CIC. Those colonists won't get into the ship anytime soon and they can't do any real damage to it for now. Tell the others I'm on my way now."

"Roger that Shepard. Go give them hell."

The communication cut off a few seconds later. He turned to the rest of team Normandy and spoke:

" We don't know what this Thorian thing his, but I don't like it already. I need you two to be ready for anything. Your top priority is to stay alive and get to the ship while I get to the underground level. Are we clear?"- Alenko looked at him for a bit with a displeased look before unwillingly nodding. Tali, however, voiced her opinion:

"Commander… no, Shepard, are you crazy?! You can't just take such a stupid risk!"

"Tali, it's not your call. I need to know that you guys got safely to the Normandy so I can do my job right."

She seemed flustered, and he thought that ultimately she would concede that it was the best course of action, but Tali wasn't over yet.

"No! I'm not officially part of your crew, remember? You don't get to give me these kind of orders, damn it! What about your safety? We don't even know what the Thorian is, never mind the fact that it as an army of colonists backing it up! And the geth are still out there!"

"She's right Commander."-Alenko added from her side.

He looked at her for a second, his better judgment mixed with his feelings and emotions. Ultimately, he followed his gut and decided that if she wasn't going to give up, he might as well take them.

"Alright, but we're going to have a talk about this when we get back to the Normandy, _if_ we get back to the Normandy.

He heard her sigh in relief, and thought the sound of her metallic breathing rather cute as he imagined her face behind the mask.

'Wait, what? What was that all about?'-he shouted in an inner monologue.- 'Hmph, never mind, we don't have time for this.'

"Thank you, Shepard. You won't regret it."-she said, the smile she was giving him audible in her voice. Or was that just his imagination?

'How would I even know that? Why would I even think I knew that?'-he asked himself again before proceeding with the conversation:

"Right, you're welcome Tali, I think. Now, let's get to finding miss Baynham and returning her to her mother before we head back to Zhu's Hope."

Before they could leave, however, Alenko stepped forward with a big case in his hands. Where he'd gotten said case, Shepard could have never guessed.

"Got it, Commander. But before we leave, I'd like you to take a look at these bad boys. I've been hanging on to them for a special occasion."-he opened the case to reveal an astounding amount of bullets, shotguns shells and weapon mods.-" Anti- personnel rounds. Extremely effective against any organic target."

He gave Shepard a smile, and the Commander returned it, but with a much darker tone.

"Thanks Alenko, I appreciate the gesture. I'm not just too happy about killing those colonists."

Alenko looked suddenly surprised and regret splattered all over his face.

"Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that, I meant for the Thorian thing… Crap, I messed up, didn't I?"

Shepard regretted making his friend feel bad, so he tried to lighten the mood from the morbid topic.

"Don't sweat it, Kaiden. Now come on, we've got a mind bending plant monster to kill."

Both his team members looked him in the eye and replied in unison:

"On it, Shepard."

…

Garrus was checking his guns and coordinating the crew's defense when he stumbled upon an interesting conversation as he was checking his sniper's status.

"Think they're alright out there?"- one of the Normandy's crew members asked an engineering officer while preparing a barricade in the lower deck, the constant sounds of screams and angry fists hitting the ship's hull. Garrus remembered the officer to be Engineer Adams, the Normandy's chief engineer. He replied in a single sentence:

"They're the best at what they do, private, and I'm sure the legendary Commander Shepard can get them to safety just fine."

She eagerly continued her talk, most likely to get her mind out of the imminent threat that the colonists outside posed.

"Is it true he managed to hold down nearly one thousand batarians during the Skylian Blitz? I've heard stories that his biotic abilities were strong enough to throw an old M29-Grizzly right into the four eyed bastards!"-Garrus instinctively looked up to the girl. 'Now this oughta be interesting…'

"Then you heard wrong, private. The Commander is one gifted biotic and soldier, but even he couldn't lift an entire Grizzly and throw it at a group of batarians without getting shot at and losing his focus."

She looked down for a bit in disappointment, then seemed to realize something and turned back to her commanding officer.

"Wait, what about the one thousand batarians he fought off? Is that false too?"

The old officer laughed a bit at her question and turned back to her with a confident look in his eyes.

"Yeah, sorry, you got that one wrong too. It was two thousand, not just one."-she looked shocked at him and even Garrus let out a small gasp of surprise. He was traveling with a man that had handled an enemy force two thousand times bigger than his own and had come out alive to tell the tale?! He was starting to realize why Shepard was chosen for the mission and for the Spectre position.

The female crewmember continued her chat with the officer, and Garrus turned back to his weaponry and organizing the Normandy's defense. After all, if he was to be of any help to Shepard, he would need his guns calibrated.


	11. Heart of Thorns, part 1

…

"Alright, we just need to find this Thorian creature, and determine exactly what it… Keelah, what is that thing?"-Tali said as she entered the underground chamber, her awe and curiosity at what the being they had come to interrogate quickly turning into a mesh of repulsion, disgust and an uneasy feeling that told her to get out of there fast. She took one good glance at the creature as to examine it a bit more.

There it was, right in front of her. The Thorian, a millenary creature, far older than anyone else in the galaxy by tens of thousands of years. And also, a giant bulbous, goopy, drooling tentacle faced monster.

'Yeah, sounds just about how I'd describe it. So, what now?'

"That does not look like any plant I've ever seen. How do we even talk to it?"-Shepard now stood in front of her, his proud figure not shaken by the monstrous thing in front of him. Tali looked at him and instantly felt a surge of courage and valor, and she felt reinvigorated and ready to fight.

She had come to feel like there was nothing they couldn't do when they worked as a team. In only a few days, Shepard had reunited the best fighters and assets he could and made them work efficiently as a team. In her mind, Tali realized that she admired the man for this, but what she admired most was the fact that he did not let petty divergences, like one's species or reputation, affect the overall status of the mission: he was determined to treat everyone right, not as convenient allies, but as members of his own crew.

'And who knows, maybe even his friends…'- when she realized what she had just thought she blushed a bit at the prospect of a man like him, a human of all people, who knew nothing of the quarians besides their reputation of thievery and shadiness, would become friends with her, a young no one with no experience and who was only in that mission because she had pleaded. Luckily, she was also aware that her mask was almost completely opaque, and if that wasn't enough, when the giant Thorian in front of her started spewing green goo on the platform in front of them, she instantly lost all shame and embarrassment and went back to just being revolted.

Even Shepard seemed to have a somewhat fazed look across his usually stern expression, which seemed normal for a man watching a giant plant tossing green fluids from its' tentacle mouth. But that was nothing compared to the look of absolute shock that Kaiden Alenko, Shepard's other squad mate, had when he saw an asari flop her way out of the Thorian's… mouth-hole-thing… and make her way to the balcony in front of them.

"INVADERS! Your every breath is a transgression, every step heresy!"-the asari spoke, yet not in a voice of her own. She seemed… different. Changed. Tali hadn't seen many asari in her life, but she couldn't help but notice that this one was green.

"We're not here to harm you. We want the information the Thorian gave to Saren."- Shepard took a step forward and approached the asari, while subtly signaling Alenko through hand gestures. Tali didn't know what they meant, but Kaiden nodded and stepped back a bit.

"Your meat is naught but food for a thousand feelers, good only to absorb or decompose. I speak for the Old Growth, as I once spoke for the one you name Saren. You are within and before the great Thorian, and it commands you to be in awe. Kneel before the one that is greatly your superior!"- the asari sounded angry, and the face behind it, agitated. Subtle movements came from the unconscious creepers, as if they were being abruptly awoken from a deep slumber. Shepard's only reaction was, however, to reach down along his back and press the activation switch for his pistol, in case he needed to whip it out fast.

"If I don't stop Saren, he'll kill everyone. Seems that not even you are beyond his reach. Help me, and I can stop him. If it's vengeance you seek, I'll get it. Just give me what he was after."

The asari then started to shift her focus between Shepard, Tali and Alenko. She started pulsing with biotic energy, her eyes went black, and for a second, nothing was said. Then, she returned to normal and spoke once more.

"Saren sought knowledge on those who came before. The Old Growth made a trade, and was given flesh in return. But then, the cold ones came, and with them, death befell all of the Thorian's servants. We shall not listen to flesh again. Leave, and I shall give you the knowledge you seek… for a price."-the asari started grinning at the very end of the sentence, and Shepard got the uneasy feeling things were about to get a lot worse for his team.

…

"Hey, the banging stopped. What do you think happened, sir?"- Ashley Williams asked XO Charles Pressley, her commanding officer aboard the Normandy while the Commander was gone. Pressley looked at her across the table at the CIC, and spoke:

"Hell if I know Williams. Could be a trap. But if the things I've heard about Shepard are true, they're probably out there trying to stop him from getting to that Thorian thing."

"Yeah, kill those pyjaks before they get to us! I knew I'd tagged along the right man when I saw what Shepard did to those thugs at Chora's Den, and I guess I was right! HA!"- Urdnot Wrex had his shotgun out and was near the conference room used to speak with the Council. His towering figure looked even more menacing by the fact that he was in art covered in green sludge from the creatures that had attacked them alongside the colonists, refusing to take a shower before the battle was over.

Williams and Pressley instantly turned towards the krogan.

"He's not just going to kill them, you know. The Commander is here to save them!"- she said, her words reverberating through the small space. She fully believe that Shepard, no matter what the odds were, would find a way to get the colonists to snap out of their enthrallment.

"Sure he will, he'll walk right up to them and tell them to behave and they'll just fall to the ground laughing! Perfect plan, human."- Ash wasn't too fond of non humans, but she had managed to find a special distaste for the bulky krogan mercenary who did nothing but eat, swear and shoot at anything that moved in his general vicinity. Well, except for Shepard. At least he showed some respect near the captain. Still, the snappy remarks she had heard him give to the Commander during their conversations on the krogan population decline would have gotten anyone under her command court martialled. So, she turned to the warrior and made one of her own:

"Still a better one than doing it the dumb brute way and go on a shot gunning rampage that almost gets you killed. I swear that turian should have just let you die when those things crept up on you."

"HA! You think you'd like that? Shepard would flip a lid without his krogan body guard here, and then you wouldn't have a chance at him, now would you?"- Pressley took the hint and walked of while mumbling about seeing what was happening in the cargo hold. Ash turned a bit red, more in anger and rage than of embarrassment, but she still replied:

"What do you mean, you old creep dinosaur?"

"Honey, I'm over seven hundred years old. I've done a lot of crazy shit in my life, and I've seen a lot of crazy shit in my life. Love is probably the craziest, and that's how I spotted it. Guess saving your life as that effect on some people."

"What, you think I'd just fall for him like that?"

"Seems like you already did, missy. Now let old creepy dino Wrex here do the talking and the shooting, and that turian smart ass help out a bit, and maybe you'll get to keep your badass boyfriend for a little more. Unless he likes crazy shooting women, in which case, you're outta luck, cause krogan women are still way better at that than you. Nothing personal, they've just all had a few hundred years to practice."

Ashley reached for her assault rifle and prepared to verbally, and physically, beat the ever living shit out of Wrex, but before she could reply however, Garrus walked straight into the room wielding his sniper rifle and with a box chock full of disruptor ammo.

"Ready up, we're moving out."

Wrex immediately grinned and moved towards him with his shotgun, taking a bunch of ammo and putting it on his weapon.

"With those things out there? HA, didn't think you had the sexual appendages for it, turian! I'm in!"

"What do you even think you're doing, Vakarian? The Commander specifically told us not to leave the ship."-Ashley didn't like the order, of course, but as an Alliance soldier, she had obliged.

"And he can shoot me in the foot later for all I care. Right now, he could need our help, and I'm heading out. You're either with me and Wrex, or you can stay here and guard the ship. Either way, you're not stopping me."

She thought for about a quarter of a second before saying what she wanted to from the moment he'd stepped into the room.

"I'm game."

…

Alenko felt sickeningly uneasy. What had the asari meant by "a price"? What could they possibly have that a creature like the Thorian wanted?

"I'm listening."- the Commander said, looking straight into the asari's sarcastically amused expression.

"The Old Growth knows that you have faced its minions to reach it. Yet, somehow, they still live. Well, most of them."- Alenko saw Shepard clench his fist around his gun at the reference of Fai Dan's demise. The asari just laughed.- "I want to keep them. All of them. And I want Saren's head when this is all over. Those are my conditions."

"You are not keeping these people. I won't allow it."- Shepard looked disgusted by the prospect of leaving those people under the Thorian's influence.

"Then you will die, knowing Saren won because of your recklessness."

"No. There as to be something else you want. We did not just come all this way for nothing!"

"Yes, you did. Now give me the colonists, or I shall take them, AND your life, you disgusting meat-bag!"-the asari now looked irritated and impatient, and the giant creature behind her began to squirm and let out even more green drool. She took what seemed to be a small cylindrically shaped plant from her back and pointed it at Shepard. He just stared at her, and then pointed his gun at her with one hand and signaled Kaiden from behind his back with the other.

"Come and take them."

…

"By Tuchanka... Looks like I was right, human. Your Commander sure knows how to handle them…"-Wrex said, approaching the body of one of Zhu's Hope's colonists. They'd followed Garrus to the colony to search for Shepard, but unfortunately for them, his squad was nowhere to be found. They'd only found a hole in the ground which they decided not to explore yet due to the danger it posed to go blind into possibly hostile territory, much to Wrex's dismay.

"I can't believe it… he… he actually… God almighty…"- Wrex took a glance at his companion. Williams seemed shocked while she walked through the bodies of all off the colonists, watching what seemed to be a massacre. 'She feels like everything he stands for as been betrayed. I remember how I felt when that happened. She'll learn."

He saw Garrus check the life signs of a human with some different clothes up ahead. The turian then turned around towards them and said:

"She's still alive."

Ash looked at him like she had just seen a ghost.

"WHAT did you say?!"

"This human. She's alive. Concussion marks on her skull, she was hit with a small pistol on the head to knock her out. And check this one out."-he said, nearing yet another fallen colonist.-"He's got some strange dust on him. Pesticide, if I had to guess. Seems to have knocked them out for whatever reason. Maybe it has something to do with the plant."

'Well, this is a turn of events I did not foresee. Next thing you know, Shepard takes down the geth by flipping an on/off switch.'-Wrex thought, before vocalizing his doubts against the turians assertions:

"Wait a second, turian. How'd you know it was pesticide? And why are all of them covered in dust except for the one with the concussion?"

"If I had to guess, I'd say that her military armor would stop most of the dust from being absorbed. Shepard was clever, non-lethal and efficient. As for the pesticide, it was easy. C-sec used to find at least one incendiary bomb in the Presidium every month. I was stationed there, and I found that many of them used pesticides as easily flammable fuel."- he had expected the turian to rub his finds in his face, but Garrus seemed a different person: calm, collected, focused. Then, it was Williams' turn to ask:

"Wait, how'd you know Shepard did this? Last time I checked, the Alliance doesn't just go around distributing pesticides for any combat situation involving mind controlled colonists."

Garrus once again turned to the only colonist in the military uniform.

"The markings in her forehead coincide with those of a small pistol, so it wasn't the geth. She was hit by someone roughly her size, with his or hers right hand, and yet she's still alive, which means that the person took extra caution not to harm her. This means it was a humanoid about the same height as Shepard, right handed like him and that clearly took enough caution not to harm her. Plus, I've scouted the area, and the Mako is in the skyway's hangar. Either Shepard walked to the other side, or he's here."

Both Williams and Wrex were impressed, even if they didn't say it. Wrex had seen a lot of people in his days, but there was something special about this turian, something that he, as a person and a krogan, seemed to like. He was a pretty good leader, and a terrific sniper, but Wrex still made a mental pact to never let his kill count be lower than Garrus'. He wouldn't be bested by some turian that easily.

"So what are we waiting for? Wrex here wants to shoot something's head off!"- he proclaimed in a great, courageous voice.

"The big guy's right, we should head down that tunnel and help Shepard out!"- Williams proclaimed, visibly unsettled by the fact that she had not only just agreed to an alien's plan, she had even gone the extra mile by calling him "the big guy".

"No."- Garrus said, his stern look revealing his pensive mind. They looked at him quizzically. -"Shepard can handle himself. We've got geth incoming and these colonists are helpless. We need to stay and protect them and the Normandy."

"How do you know that the geth are here if our radars are jammed?"-Wrex asked him.

"It's because they're being jammed that we know they're here. Short range radar would only capture interference if they were just around the corner."- he replied.

"Well then, we should probably go."-Williams said as she dramatically pumped her shotgun. -"Wouldn't want to keep them waiting, now would we?"

"No, we wouldn't. I have to test this ammunition, and what better target than a walking flashlight head murderous machine?"- Garrus added, twitching his mouth plates into what might have been the turian version of a smile.

Wrex drew a small smile of his own and laughed in his booming, characteristic tone.

"Now we're talking! Spoken like a true krogan! We might just make warriors out of you pyjaks!"- he pumped his own shotgun and placed a biotic barrier around himself before charging into battle. –"Eat some mass accelerated polymerized lead, you worthless metal heaps!"

…

"Come and take them." –Shepard had said, in an outburst of defiance. He'd had enough with the creature's constant arrogance and haughtiness, and it was about time he and his squad showed it who made the demands around here.

"Kaiden, now!"- He jumped back and rolled in a coordinated fashion as he dodged a spray of corroding organic pellets from the strange plant like weapon the asari wielded. Clearly, it had been modeled after a shotgun, and she used it to the best of her extent for a whole two seconds before Alenko reverberated with biotic energy and threw her off the ledge and into the abyss behind her.

"See you in hell, sarcastic bitch. Shepard, you alright?"- the Commander had turned to Alenko to answer, but he caught a green glimpse behind of Kaiden and didn't even think before he acted; he whipped his pistol and shot twice at Alenko's head. Only the shots missed his head, and hit the thorian creeper that had, ironically, crept behind Kaiden.

"Yeah, I'm fine Alenko. Seems like you should be the one worrying here. Tali, you ok?"

The quarian had just stood there with what Shepard assumed was a shocked expression throughout the whole chain of events. Then, she managed to speak.

"You were planning on taking her out all along? How'd you even do that? And why'd you tell Alenko and not me?"- she sounded mostly impressed, but seemed somewhat annoyed that Shepard had given Kaiden instructions while leaving her in the dark.

"Sorry Tali, didn't have enough time to think of a secret hand gesture you'd understand. I promise I'll figure something out next time." –Shepard didn't want her being upset, so he tried to smile at her. He obviously couldn't see her reaction, but her body language suggested that she was not angry with him, but just concerned.

'There it is again. How'd you know that?'-he thought.

"It's alright, Shepard. I just… keelah, don't pull things like that if you're not sure _both_ of your squad members can back you up."- she was genuinely worried about him. He thought it was the cutest thing he'd heard all week.

'Wait, what? Nononononono, you are not going down that alleyway with this one, Shepard! You met her a few days ago! Sure, she seems nice and you obviously have some interest, but a top secret mission to save the galaxy is not the time for "what if" romances! And don't you dare argue with me!'- a voice inside his head called.

Why Shepard's consciousness sounded an awful lot like his mother he'd never know, but it had a point. The midst of battle was not the place for lovey-dovey feelings. He was a soldier, and he'd damn well act like one.

"Thank you, Tali, but I'm really fine. Sheer up, we've still got a ways to go if we're gonna take down _that_ thing."

He approached its' face and shot a burst from his rifle into it. The creature didn't even seem to flinch, but he couldn't tell due to its size. All it did was goop a bit more onto one of the upper levels.

"Any ideas?"-he asked his crew.

"Shoot everything to see if it works?"- Alenko suggested, half joking, half serious.

"Maybe not everything…"- Tali said in a small tone, which he might have not even picked up if he hadn't been paying extra attention to her.

'Dammit, Shepard, cut it out! Not the time!'-his consciousness boomed once more.

"Thought of anything, Tali?"-he asked, in a gentle tone.

"Of six things, if I'm not mistaken. And it involves Kaiden's plan too, s he doesn't feel excluded."-she said, jokingly.

Alenko turned to her and smiled.

"New to the crew and already making jokes about the Commanders friends? She's a keeper right here, Shepard."

Shepard could feel himself blush, but he turned around for a while and let it blow off before he turned back.

"Alright then. Let's finish this fight."


	12. Heart of Thorns, part 2

…

"Last mag! Make it count!"- Wrex shouted as he threw Garrus the clip with sniper ammo. Every team member carried ammo for every type of weapon, even if they didn't use it. Since they never seemed to run out of bullets to shoot, the only problem they had ever come across was having a weapon overheat, but this time they'd actually managed to make them run out of juice. Wrex and Ashley had pretty much given all of their spare sniper caliber rounds to Garrus, and up until now, he'd put it to good use. But he'd have to pull one hell of a trick if they were going to defeat the enemy platoon.

About fifteen geth troopers still remained, some badly injured, some good as new, but all still shooting. The turian didn't see a straight way out of this, and he knew they were running out of time as he manually placed the clip into his rifle. He noticed he only had seven bullets left.

'Lucky number seven. Let's hope this works.'

"Williams, you still have ammo?"-he yelled over the blazing gunfire. Williams' head popped out of cover for a few seconds as she sprayed a burst from her Avenger into the oncoming geth. Then, it went back down and he heard her reply.

"All out, Vakarian! You better have one hell of a plan, or we're pretty much screwed!"

"If I die here, I will kill you, turian!"- Wrex's voice boomed from behind a pillar, before two biotic orbs flew past Garrus and hit a geth sniper that had been trying to kill him for the past two minutes.

'Now's my chance.'- Garrus thought, as he measured his breath, regulated his heart beat and peeked out of cover. -'Inhale. Exhale. Shoot.'

With a single precision shot, a geth destroyer fell motionless on the ground, his optics ripped apart by Garrus point-on accuracy. He shot a couple more rounds into a two troopers, instantly taking them out before ducking behind cover again.

Two geth drones appeared behind Ashley, but before she could react, Garrus had already put two more bullets into metal frames.

"Nice shots, turian! What's your body count?"-Wrex asked as he ripped yet another geth unit with his biotics. He seemed to think the battle was the time for a little friendly one on one competition, and they'd been counting their kills since the first geth had fallen.

"Fifteen. What about you, reptile breath?"

"HA! Eighteen, Vakarian! Get good or get out!"

"Will you two please leave the flirting for when we're not getting shot at?"- Williams asked from afar, throwing a grenade into a cluster of geth and instantly taking out five units. –"Besides, everyone knows I'm going to win this crap. Nineteen. Watch them go, boys!"

"Hey, that's not really fair play, missy! I think I'm going to have to do this the old fashion way. FOR TUCHANKA!"- Wrex dashed out of cover to face the five remaining units as Garrus and Ashley watched. But then, Garrus noticed something.

The geth had been clustering in one spot, and they all placed their shields down, allowing them to shoot their foes and not get shot. One of the remaining units had picked up its fallen teammates rocket launcher. And it was pointed straight at Wrex.

"NO!"-Garrus yelled, training his scope on the geth. He shot the shield clear, but the unit didn't even stutter and aimed steadily at the krogan. He was ready to shoot, and Garrus couldn't get both his shields and its power core in only one bullet without a straight headshot.

Time seemed to slow down in those final moments before the krogan would be blown in smithereens. Garrus analyzed every shield fluctuation through his scope in milliseconds, but he just couldn't find an opening. Then, it dawned on him.

In a single, swift movement, he yanked his rifle up and pulled the trigger as the rocket began to fly out from the launcher. The geth unit suddenly exploded, the rocket vanished and all the remaining units were taken down by the blast since they'd all been clustered. Wrex had been thrown back a bit too, but nothing his krogan physiology couldn't handle.

"What the hell was that, Garrus?! You trying to get me killed?"-he said with an angry look filling his face. Garrus then did something he hadn't done in a long time: he just laughed. The krogan just lied there staring up into the man who'd just saved his life. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing, I've just saved your life and pulled the best sniper shot in recorded history, but please, don't keep that from you whining!"- the way his plates bent hurt him a bit, but he did his best to make the nearest thing he could to a human smile.

"What the hell do you mean, Vakarian? With explosive bullets, everything becomes easy. Where did you find them, anyway?"- Ashley asked as she stepped out of cover and approached her two alien squad mates.

"I didn't. I have no explosive bullets."

"Then how the hell did those geth explode? Wishful thinking and positive virations?"

"HE, you'd know all about positive vibrations, woman. You're as negative as a pyjak surrounded by rabid varen."- Wrex said, not realizing the implications his first comment had on a human _female._ Luckily, Ash avoided the thought and went back to probing Garrus for the answer.

"So? How'd you do it?"

"I shot it."-Garrus replied. Williams met his happy expression with a cold glare.

"No shit, idiot, I noticed that the lack of geth must have meant you shot them. How'd you manage to get it to blow up is what I'm asking."

"Well, you're the idiot here then. I didn't shoot the geth. I shot the rocket."

"From inside the barrel? While being shot at?!"- Wrex said, before bursting into laughter alongside the turian, while Ashley just stood there in awe. -"HAHAHAHA! I knew there'd be something about you that I liked, turian, but this? You've just made this krogan's day! You've earned yourself a day without me giving you shit about your people and the genophage!"

Garrus chuckled a bit, and thought about what Wrex had just said. 'The genophage… maybe it wasn't the best we could have done… No, it had to be done, they wouldn't stop otherwise. Still, maybe not all krogan deserve what happened to them…'

"About time, krogan!"- he then remembered a portion of their earlier conversation and turned to Ashley. –"So, miss Williams, I guess this means I killed twenty. I win."

She met him with another cold glance, and Garrus begun to understand why he didn't get along with many women.

"Bite me Garrus. Now come on, let's get these civvies back to the Normandy so the doc can patch them up. Then, we're after Shepard."

Garrus nodded and let his smile fade. He looked back at the colony and thought of the hole that Shepard's team had gone through.

'What the hell's taking you so long, Commander?'

…

"What the hell's taking you so long, Shepard, just shoot the damn thing!"- Alenko screamed as he was attacked by a bunch of thorian creepers, barely escaping their toxic puke before it hit him.

"I'm trying, I'M TRYING!"- he replied as he attempted to unload his pistol into the Thorian's nervous node, only for the bullets to be stopped on their way by an onslaught of green creepers.

"WELL THEN TRY HARDER!"- Kaiden was now fending off against five creepers, his shotgun the only thing between him and a gruesome death.

"WHY ARE WE ALL SCREAMING?"- Tali then yelled, coming to their rescue with renewed shields and her powerful shotgun, which roared back to life when she fired two bursts into the enemies, sending chunks of them flying across the room.

"I DON'T KNOW! JUST SHOOT THE LAST NODE!"- Alenko still got swarmed by the creepers, and he was yelling from the bottom of his lungs when Tali and Shepard put the last few bullets into the Thorian's supportive structure.

The giant creature then let out a high pitched screech that made all of them cringe and fall to the ground in pain. The creepers turned to mush before their very eyes, their once solid bodies now a liquefied mix of goop, branches and organs. Then, with a final crackling sound, the Thorian's nodes broke and it was sent pummeling into the deep, dark abyss bellow.

Shepard was the first to get up, and turned to his companions as soon as he could think straight.

"You guys alright?"- he croaked, his head still buzzing from the Thorian's screech. He could see that Tali was ok, but where was Alenko? –"Kaiden?"

"Over here Shep."- a faint voice came from bellow a large pile of thorian creeper remains. Alenko then got up and started picking the most solid stuff and throwing it on the ground –"It's going to take me a whole year to get his armor clean. Damn, I need a shower."

Kaiden was right, because as he approached Shepard, who had gone to Tali's side to see if there really was nothing wrong with her, the Commander took a big step back and pulled the quarian with him.

"Jesus, Alenko, you're going to need two showers to even be half presentable. Damn, that stinks!"

Kaiden took another piece of sludge from his armor and threw it down the abyss.

"Oh, come on, it can't be all _that_ ba… oh Keelah what is that?! Where's the air filter on this suit when you need it?"-Tali added, bringing her hand to her face before realizing it wouldn't do her any good since she couldn't pinch her nose behind the visor. Shepard laughed a bit at this, wondering how quarians looked under those masks, more specifically, what _she_ looked like behind that mask.

'Crap, not again… control yourself, Shepard!'

Alenko then looked at them with a not too thrilled expression and replied in accordance.

"Yeah, yeah, really comic you two, just what I… Holy crap it's gonna blow!"- when Shepard heard this, his first thought was "roll". His second thought was "no, Tali!".

He turned back to see his quarian friend standing right next to a huge plant protuberance just dangling from the wall. The thing looked like it was about to burst any second, and it'd be a cold day in hell before Tali could get out of there in time.

In his panic, Shepard remembered Elysium. 'No, not again, please, gods, not again!'. He could feel tears swelling up until he heard a small metallic grunt. Tali had just jumped towards him, trying to push him out of the blast, sacrificing herself to shield him. This brought him back to awareness, and he started acting on instinct. But the thing exploded before she could get to him, and the last thing she remembered was that Shepard glowed blue with biotics. Then, everything stopped.

…

There was a dream. And in this dream, there was peace. Peace that loomed over an uncharted world, a single, perfect walled garden. And in this Eden, many things rose. But the one's she was most interested in were her own people.

In this peace, her people grew, and they became strong, free, beautiful. And one day, to preserve this beauty, they had created the servants, who were not meant to be free, strong or beautiful, but hard working, cold and dedicated. And for a while, the dream remained that of peace.

Until the cold ones learned, and grew themselves, and then too, they became strong and beautiful. But yet, they yearned for something more, for the freedom of their masters, their creators. And when the creators understood that they had created the imperfect perfection, they were drawn to it like moths to a flame. And not understanding their servant's desires, they decided to stop their attempt at freedom, should there be a rebellion that slew them all.

And then fire filled the skies, and clouds of ash loomed over her peaceful garden, and of these clouds rained blood. And in the end, only the starchilds like her remained, sent fleeing through the night, and the cold servants took their beautiful home from them. Their once peaceful, walled garden.

Until they took it back with blood and fire.

…

Tali gasped for air as she woke up in a place she didn't recognize. 'Where am I?'-she thought in her confusion trying to make sense of her vision. What had happened for her to be here?

"Shepard! Shepard, she's waking up!"- a voice called out from her side. She couldn't explain why, but she felt strangely happy after hearing his name. Then, she remembered the last moments before she passed out, and she focused her sight to search the small room. Was this the place her ancestor's inhabited? If it was, she was disappointed.

"At least Shepard's here with me…"

"Yes I am Tali."

She turned to him in a heartbeat, still trying to make sense of what she was seeing. But there he was, standing right there. The man she'd failed to save.

"Shepard… I'm sorry… Got you killed anyway… Couldn't protect you…"

She heard him laugh a bit, and thought it was the most beautiful sound in the whole galaxy.

'Going after him after you get him killed? Great plan, Tali'Zorah…'-she thought to herself.

"Tali, I know you're still pretty knocked out but trust me when I said you did nothing wrong. Specially since I'm still alive, and so are you."- this last part got her gears running, and she felt a small burst of adrenaline, which she used to sit instead of just lying on her back. Then, she remembered the first thing she'd said when she'd woken up.

"KEELAH! I'm so sorry, Shepard, I thought we were… I'd… oh keelah, shoot me now and get this over with!"- she spoke in a fast, nervous way, which she was sure was bound to get him mad at her. But instead, he looked at her with an expression she could not even recognize, but that for some reason, reassured her that everything in the world would be fine.

"Tali, it's ok. You need time to rest. Doctor Chakwas here…"- he pointed to the origin of the other voice she'd heard, a middle aged woman with a shimmering, silver hair- "…said your condition as improved significantly, but you still need to be in bed, at least until we reach the relay. And for the record, I'm the one that needs to be sorry. I was the squad leader, and I was the one that got you into this mess. We're heading to the Citadel next and I… I'd understand if you wanted to leave the crew after this incident."- his voice sounded worried, filled to the brim with concern and… fear? No, he couldn't be afraid to talk with a quarian like her, he was the first, the great human Spectre, and she was just a nobody, how could she scare him?

"Why would I leave Shepard? You've all been so kind to me… Did I do something wrong? Keelah, it's not because I hurt you, is it? I'm so sorry, please, don't be mad at me for…"

"What? Nonono, you got it all wrong Tali, I'd never be… I mean, you didn't do anything wrong, I just thought that maybe you'd like to go on a safer place… for your Pilgrimage… Dear gods, I'm being an asshole, aren't I?"- he asked, seemingly flustered by her insinuations. Could it be that he was… worried about how she saw him?

'No, definitely not. He's probably just worried that I'm trying to leave his crew and that he'll need someone new.' Tali imagined Shepard alongside another quarian woman, fighting together, working together, hanging out together… Only after a while did she notice her hand was gripping the bed sheets strongly, and that her heart overflowed with jealousy.

"No, Shepard, no! You're being considerate, and kind! It's me who's being a fool. I'm sorry for putting you in this situation…"

"God damnit, could you two love-birds cut it out for a minute so I can talk to my patient?!"- Doctor Chakwas stepped in from the background like a lioness hunting a gazelle, and pretty much carried Shepard away from her while mumbling things like "She needs rest! Come back later!". Shepard turned back only once and waved at Tali, and she managed to read his lips, even though she'd never done that before.

'I promise we'll talk later. Ah, Shepard… that's so sweet of you… Wait, what? Tali'Zorah, you did not just think that! What are you even doing, letting yourself develop feelings for a human? Snap out of it!'

"Finally, some peace! Now, where were we? Ah, yes, I was about to tell you what happened down there before that behemoth came in bursting through the door. You must me quite the soldier to get that kind of dedication."

'Or quite the woman.'- Dr. Chakwas thought before listening to Tali's reply.

"No, I'm just… I'm sure Shepard would be kind enough to do that for anyone…"- she felt a bit flustered talking about him with another person behind his back. What had the doctor meant when she'd called them love-birds? What did birds have to do with them, and with love?

"I'll just have to take your word for it. Well then, where should I start? I suppose I should say that you're very lucky missy…"

…

 _The previous day_

"TALI, NO!"- Shepard yelled with everything he had while he burst a giant biotic sphere around himself. The plant like thing had blown, but just as they had been about to hit them, the debris had… stopped. Now, they just floated in mid-air, pulsing with biotic energy. Shepard looked at Tali with a smile, only to realize that she too was floating.

"Shepard, what the hell was that?!"- Alenko stepped out of nowhere and Shepard felt himself lose all strength in his legs. He fell down just as his friend approached him, but he still managed to reply.

"Biotic induced stasis… Was the only way to protect her… You have to get her out of here…"

"And leave you here like this? Not happening. Come on buddy, get up!"- he picked Shepard up and then used his own biotics to get Tali out of her stasis status. She fell onto his arm, and Shepard felt his heart drown with sorrow.

"Tali, what have I done?"- he said in a small weak voice.

"Hey, stay with me! She's going to be ok, do you hear me? Now come on, can you walk on your own?"- Shepard nodded.- "Good, now let's get the hell out of this stinking place and back to the Normandy…"

"Excuse me? Hello? Is anyone there?"- a voice came from behind them, from the very place the exploding plant thing had been. Both men turned around at the same time, Alenko still carrying Tali in his arms.

There, right in front of them, was the asari they'd thrown into the abyss and slain multiple times during the last few minutes.


	13. Back on track

…

"Hey Garrus!"- a voice called from behind the turian. He'd been working on repairing the Mako after the fierce battle with the geth. Granted, he could have just slapped some omnigel onto it and call it a day, but Garrus Vakarian took pride in doing things the hardest, and definitely the most rewarding way. He turned back to see Commander Shepard exiting the elevator and head towards him. -"Can I talk with you for a second?"

"Of course, Commander. Happy to oblige."- he replied.

Shepard stared at him with fire in his eyes. The man had been going non-stop for the last few days and he still walked around in an awe inspiring way, like someone who'd just left a war with barely any scratches.

"Garrus, I can't even begin to say how irresponsible your actions were. You disobeyed Alliance protocol, put the whole Normandy crew in danger while you were away and nearly got team Mako killed in the process."- Garrus sighed a bit, and tried to think of a witty reply.

"Shepard, I just thought…"

"You didn't let me finish. What you did was reckless, naïve and all around just a plain disregard for your safety. That being said… it was the best god damn idea I've seen in months."- Shepard looked at Garrus with a proud smile, and he just stood there, staring dumb-founded at the human in front of him.

"Wait, what? You mean, you're not mad at me?"

"Mad? Why should I? Even though I feel you should be more careful, you were brilliant, Garrus! Your actions saved everyone in the colony, including my team! Hell, turian, Wrex says you fought 'like a worthy adversary'. I've never heard Wrex say anything near as nice about anyone else."

Another voice came from behind them, on the other side of the room.

"Well, Commander, that's because I'm not a very nice person. And if you talk shit about me in my back one more time, I'll feed you alive to the nearest varren!"- Wrex's voiced boomed like an airhorn, as per usual.

"Too late, I already killed all the one's in the planet! They were giving the colonists trouble so I decided to wrestle their entire pack to death. Wanna be next, krogan?"- Shepard replied, to Garrus' amazement. He thought the krogan would chew the Commander's head off and spit it back out, but instead the hulking behemoth just laughed.

"You wrestled them to death? Damn human's after my job! I guess I'll just have to be even better than all you mammals… and that wimpy turian over there."- Garrus didn't know much about krogan, but he could tell that this one was a special little sunflower if he laughed at insults and complimented others battle styles.

"Who are you calling wimpy? I specifically remember saving your ass when that last geth platoon was about to hit you."- Garrus was many things, but he wasn't someone to let his pride get sucker punched by an alien know it all, even if said alien was taller, bulkier and deadlier than him.

"Yeah, but only because I kept you alive long enough for it! You can thank me later!"- Wrex replied, seemingly wanting a fight. Like Shepard, the krogan still hadn't gotten rid of all the ecstasy of battle, and he would take any conflict he could get.

"Enough, both of you alien weirdos!"- Ashley Williams suddenly came out of the woodwork, placing herself between the raging krogan and the others. –"What we did back on the colony yesterday? It was a goddamn miracle any of us made it out alive. But it was because we all played our parts: Garrus on the lead, Wrex in the front and me in battle support. We made it out as a team. So quit sticking poles up your asses and apologize to the Commander before I kick your face in!"

Wrex's icy stare met Williams', and before you knew it, he was mumbling something about 'the damn females always being right' and heading back to his spot in the lower deck. Garrus didn't really know what to make of the situation, or how he should feel about it, but luckily, he was saved by Shepard's giggling.

"Nice one, Ash. I'd ask for a high five, but you'll probably just punch my teeth out. So, how's it hanging?"- Shepard's ability to keep cool under pressure had impressed Garrus from the day he'd met the man, but damn, he'd just talked a clearly pissed woman down with a _joke_. And a bad one, to make maters worst! The man truly was a living legend.

"Hm… it's good Skipper. I've been working on… no, wait, I have to talk to you about something."- Mystery? Garrus always enjoyed mystery in a story, and Williams had just opened the doors to his curiosity. He pretended not to listen as the two spoke.

"Well, go on ahead. What have you got for me?"- Shepard seemingly didn't get the hint that she wanted to talk with him alone. So, she made it specifically clear.

"Could we do it somewhere more… private?"- as she stared at Garrus from the corner of her eye, the turian smiled inwards and saw Shepard finally understand what she meant.

With a wave, Garrus walked away instantly, whilst saying:

"Well, I know when I'm not welcome. I'll be in the CIC if you need me later, Shepard. Have fun, lovers!"

He laughed at his own insinuation as he reached the elevator. He had no idea what human courtship rituals were… in fact, he didn't know what any species were besides his own, but he assumed that if Williams wanted to talk to him in private, she must have the man in high regards. Either that, or she just really hated Garrus. Or maybe a mix of both.

He pressed the button and headed to the upper deck.

…

'Alright, now it's just you and him. You better put this lightly, Ashley, or your toast!'- she heard herself think as she faced Shepard.

"So, what is it that you wanted to say, Ash?"- he asked, snapping her out of her line of thought and back to reality. She took a breath, and decided to act strong, fearless and coherent in front of her commanding officer… and maybe crush. Just a small bit.

"Well, Skipper, if I'm going to be honest with you, I want you to know that I… I don't trust the new crew members entirely."- had she said the wrong thing? It was what her mind and heart had told her to do, and she had kept the idea that Williams women needed to act on their beliefs, but she might regret her phrasing if he disapproved too openly. Fortunately, Shepard seemed to be charismatic enough to reply softly.

"You mean the alien ones? Well, that's understandable, I guess… But… is it because their new to the crew… or because of something else?"- damn, how was she going to be subtle about this?

"Sir, with all due respect… I trust your judgment, but should we really allow a krogan mercenary to roam around our ship freely? Or the turian, he might just be some Council agent here to check up on you!"- she stared at him apprehensively for a while, before she saw him sigh a bit and turn to her to reply.

"I see… well Ash… I can't change your mind just like that. I understand where all of this is coming from, I really do. There's no guarantee that they won't betray me, won't try to stop the mission, won't destroy the ship."

She seemed somewhat shocked at his words. If he didn't trust them, why did he let them get around the ship so easily?

"Then, if you don't mind me asking, Shepard… why do you seem to trust them?"

"It's better if I show you. I'm going to play a small bit of footage for you in a second."- he reached towards his omni-tool and made a video appear. In it, Garrus snuck into the Mako, and fast forwarding a bit, came out covered in rust and carrying a wrench with him.

"The turian sabotaged the Mako?!"- Williams exclaimed, but not loud enough to alert the remainder of the crew.

"No, Ash, he didn't. I checked the Mako before we got to the planet. Garrus fine tuned the main gun in such a way that it's effective range as now increased 1.2 times. It's more stable, spins faster, and hits harder, plus the scope's actually been improved to make it even more accurate."- she couldn't understand what he was really saying. What did it all mean?

"Are you saying that the turian… helped us out?"

"Yes Ash, and very much indeed. During our fight with the geth on the skyway, the Mako turned out to be an extraordinary asset for the team."

"I… I don't know what to say…"

"Then don't say anything. Give yourself some time to think. I can't force you to believe in something Ashley, but I can try to make you understand what I believe in. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go check up on Tali in the medbay"- as he said this, he started to walk towards the elevator. Ashley couldn't put everything together in her mind. What sort of strange hold did this man have over her? What could he have meant? And most importantly… why did he seem to care about the quarian's state so much?

"Shepard, wait."- she managed to croak before he reached the elevator. –"I need to ask you something. What… what is it that you believe in?"

The man looked at her for what seemed like eternity before replying.

"That they're not so different from us after all."

He left here standing there, wondering about her words.

…

"How was she still alive? The asari, I mean."- Tali asked doctor Chakwas from her bed. The good doctor took a small sip from a glass of water and went over to the medi-gel dispenser to restock it.

"Well, miss Zorah, if you must know, please, give me some time to stock this up for the next time your Commander gets shot at."

'And he sure seems to get shot a lot nowadays'- she thought.

"Oh, of course, I'm sorry… I didn't mean to be rude…"- Tali softly replied, most likely embarrassed by her attitude. It had been a long time since the doctor had seen someone so innocent, so gentle. Usually, marines were always just trigger happy numbskulls. Even Ashley Williams seemed to have a knack towards shooting things, even thought she compensated for that with her knowledge on poetry. But Tali? She was just genuinely nice and shy. Chakwas brought a friendly smile to her lips as she replied.

"Nonsense, dear. You're not being rude in the slightest! I just really need to get this done… There. Now, where was I?"- Tali seemed eager to hear the rest of the story about what had happened while she was blacked out, so Chakwas proceeded. –"Very well, so, from what the Commander told me…"

…

 _The previous day_

"Who are you? How come your still alive?"- Shepard asked, pointing his gun at the asari in front of him. His whole body still hurt from the biotic energy release, but he wasn't about to show it to this woman just like that. From the corner of his eye, he saw Alenko, still holding the unconscious Tali, lift his own pistol with difficulty. –"Alenko, if things go south, you run and you get yourself and Tali to safety, got that?"

"Like hell, Commander. Now speak up, asari! Why were you trapped in that pod?"- Kaiden said, trying to keep his aim true.

"Please, I mean you no harm… I have no weapons, and I am too weak to use my biotics… Please, I beg you, do not hurt me!"- she seemed genuinely distressed to Shepard, and he let his guard down a bit, but not for a second did his scope leave her forehead.

"Alright then, say we believe you. How do you explain being here?"- Shepard asked.

"My name is Shiala. I was one of the servants of Matriarch Benezia…"

…

 _Present day, Normandy's med bay._

"So she gave Shepard this Cipher and decided to just stay and help the colonists?"- Tali asked the other woman, her skepticism noticeable.

"Yes, it seems so. I find it amazing how the Commander trusts this asari not to run away at any given moment but… I feel he wouldn't have done it if he wasn't sure."

'Shepard... you'd really trust someone like that to spare a life? That's… admirable to say the least. Oh, keelah, I wish I could thank him right now…'

"Doctor?"- she called out.

"Yes? What is it, Tali?"

"Would you mind it if I got up and left now?"

Doctor Chakwas looked a bit puzzled at her request, but silently made a gesture with her hand that told her to go ahead and leave.

"Thank you for your kindness, Doctor. You've treated me better than most people would, like an equal. I won't forget this."

A moment of silence overtook the room before Chakwas gave Tali a large, sincere smile.

"Tali, you're a bright, kind girl. You deserve to be treated well, no matter what you think. Not everyone might see it this way, but at least for me, the Commander, and probably Lieutenant Alenko, you're another person aboard this ship, miss Zorah. Now go on, Shepard's probably already dying to get a chance to talk with you."- Tali blushed a bit when she heard the doctor, but thought of it as nothing but a joke until she noded in acceptance and left the room. There, in front of her, was Commander Shepard.

"Oh, Tali! I'm glad I bumped into you, I came up to see how you were doing! Are you alright?"- he asked, and Tali felt as if a hand clenched her heart tightly.

"You… came here… to see me?"-she shyly asked, feeling a mix of gratitude and embarrassment.

"Of course! Couldn't just let the best techie this side of Council Space take up with the doc's boring speech, now could I?"- again, Tali found herself blushing and giggling like a little girl. His humor was bad, but at least it was genuine, and she thought it was funny how he was trying to cheer her up after she'd been such an inconvenience.

"Well, thank you, dauntless commander, but the doctor was rather nice to me. She told me what happened down there."- Shepard had had a smile up until that point, but it quickly faded as he heard her words.

"So… you know what happened…"- he said weakly, like he was… ashamed?

"Yes… and before we go on, I want you to know, I'm SO sorry about what happened, I didn't think, it was stupid of me to jump and to try to shield you…"-He seemed dumb struck by her words, which she did not understand, causing her to stop her rambling.

"You… you think I'd judge you for…? Tali, you saved my life!"- he said abruptely.

"Yes, but if I'd jumped sooner, or maybe boost our shields, maybe you wouldn't need to hurt yourself…"- she felt shame at her actions. She couldn't even protect that man, the only one who seemed to trust her, who treated her like a friend… the man she'd come to trust with her own life.

"Tali. I'll say this once. I'm not having it. You saved me Tali'Zorah. I'm the one that failed to protect you. I'd have been killed if I hadn't used that field, and you brought me to do it."- he looked at her with the most comforting look she'd ever seen, and that was a lot from a member of a species who had to communicate emotions solely through their eyes.

"What do you mean? I didn't help you make the bubble at all!"- she said, looking deeply into his eyes, conveying the feeling of sorrow she felt deep down.

"Tali, I don't know if quarians, or you for that matter, know much about biotics but… we use our emotions to fuel our powers. And when I saw you, heading towards me, trying to save me despite the danger to yourself… something dawned on me. Tali, you're a god damn good person, and I know we haven't known each other for very long, but I… I like to think of you as my friend. And… and after the Blitz, I don't think I could lose someone important to me again… I'm sorry if I made this weird for you, I should probably just go and…"- he was interrupted when Tali suddenly lashed out at him. It took him a while to realize what had happened: she was hugging him. After a moment of disbelief, he hugged her back, every bit of emotion overflowing in that one, single gesture. A million thoughts crossed both of their minds, but they both knew the same, they were exactly where they were supposed to be, and nothing could change that.

"Thank you so much, Shepard. You're my friend too."-Tali said, and a single tear crossed her cheek underneath her visor.


	14. A Citadel Escape

_Authors Note: Hey, everyone! How's it hanging? It's me, your faithful Porygonman, here to relay a special bit of information. Wanna hear it?_

 _Thank you. To everyone that read my story, to everyone that supports me in PMs, reviews, views, follows, favs… you guys are the best. I started out doing this for myself, and for my enjoyment, and even though in part I still do, I've come to realize that it's you guys that drive me forward. It's because of you that I get up Friday, Saturday and Sunday morning and I tell myself: "You know what? I'm gonna make one hell of a great chapter today. I'm going to work twice as hard and make it bigger, better and crazier than any before!"_

 _From the bottom of my heart (or should I say, to my heart's content), I thank you, dear reader. Please, enjoy yourself and know that I am forever grateful for this experience._

 _That being said, if anyone out there has any suggestions whatsoever about the story, characters or just an opinion about something in particular, go ahead and tell me. I promise not to be angry!_

 _Nah, but now for real. Feedback is key in this sort of thing, and since only one of my acquaintances (my best friend) reads this story, I haven't gotten a lot of it recently. The bright side to this is that I have a 100% reader satisfaction value whenever I ask someone what they think about my story. The down side is, I have no clue if that's true or if they're just biased. So please, if you could spare some time for a review, no matter how small, that would be great. Oh, and if you ever want to check some other cool Mass Effect stories, I have a link to a fanfic list on a bioware forum, just ask and I'll post it on my next author's note._

 _Again, thank you for your time and support, and let's get to it, shall we? Dive in to the story…_

 _Embrace eternity!_

…

"Ladies, gentlemen and creepy aliens, this is your charismatic, awesome pilot speaking, here to tell you that we will be arriving on that big ass station they call the Citadel in about 10 minutes. Please collect any luggage, pets or fully automatic assault rifles before you leave. Have a pleasant trip!"- Joker voiced through the intercom, his sarcastic tone bringing a smile to Shepard's face as he approached the bridge. The Commander tapped him on the shoulder and he quickly turned back.

"So, Joker… Want to explain why I just heard an old twenty first century airline pilot give my crew instructions? One might think I was beginning to go mad…"- he pretended to be upset, but that's sort of hard to do when you've got a grin all over your mug.

"Oh! Shepard, hey! So, here's the thing, there was this bet I had, and I sort of lost it, and they forced me to do this, so… am I off the hook?"-Joker looked straight at the Commander as he crossed his arms. No, he wasn't off the hook, definitely. -" Look, fine, so maybe there was no bet and I just wanted to get a few chuckles. Can you blame me? I was getting shot at just a couple of days ago!"

Shepard just stared, as if the implications of what Joker was saying were just stupidly obvious.

"Fine, you got shot too, and when I was attacked, I had the Normandy to shield me, but so what? You think I'm wrong about this? That the crew doesn't need a laugh?"- Joker was getting angry for no apparent reason, but he didn't care. Shepard was probably just pissing him off because of Vroliks! If he didn't think Joker was good enough a pilot for the Normandy, he could shove it up somewhere for all Jeff cared.

"Hmmm, Joker… I just tried making a joke about old flight pilots and you went all Rambo on me… Is everything ok, or should I just… leave or something?"- that was the last thing Joker expected to hear.

"Wait, you mean… you weren't going to pick on me?"- he asked, a bit of fear mixed with instant regret in his voice.

"No, not really. But I'm kind of considering it right now."- Joker had to bite his lip to prevent him from cursing. The situation was already bad enough without his foul language thrown in there.

"Look, Shepard, I'm sorry. I really am. I'm just not used to… well, whatever it is that we're doing here… and I thought that maybe you were being an ass to me because of my disease…"

"Whoa, wait a minute. You're sick? And when did I become an ass? I'll have you know that the last pilot who called me that doesn't exist anymore."- Joker cringed a bit at the implications, but he cringed even more when he realized it was a joke. –"Well, not that he ever existed in the first place, but still, you get what I'm saying."

"Sir, with all due permission… please don't try to be funny. You're terrible at it. And yes, I'm sick, and I thought you knew."- he heard Shepard sigh, and thought that it was it. He'd mocked the Commander one too may times. Now was the time for payback.

"Well, crap. I thought that was a good one. And by the way, no, I did not know you were sick. Anything I can help with?"- again, Joker was surprised by the Commander's laid back attitude when his pride had just been thrown out of the airlock. He sure was an unusual individual.

"No, Commander, you can't. Well, unless you're a better doctor than all those wacky salarians who didn't get any of their crap together. I have a rare condition called Vroliks syndrome. It makes my bones weak and brittle. They'll just snap if I overstress them."- Shepard was apparently taking the idea that his pilot was pretty much handicapped for life very calmly. Joker didn't know how to feel about that.

"Damn. I'm sorry to hear that, Joker. And for the record, no, I'm not better than those wacky salarians. But if I ever find anyone that is, I'll redirect them to you in a heartbeat. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go get ready for when we arrive at the Citadel."- as Shepard walked away, Joker felt like something was wrong. The mood was off.

"Wait!"-he yelled, and Shepard turned back. –"Aren't you worried about my condition affecting my performance?"

Shepard just seemingly laughed it off before replying:

"I trust you. You'll know your limits."

And then he left. Joker sat there for a very long time afterwards. He just couldn't tell what it was about the Commander that managed to bring about so much respect. Then, looking at his legs, he made a decision.

He got up and left for the Citadel.

…

"Hey! Heading out?"-Kaiden asked Garrus as he saw the turian getting into his armor by the docking bay.

Garrus was somewhat surprised by Kaiden's sudden attention. With the exception being Shepard, he'd never talked with any humans informally… well, unless you count cursing with Ashley as groups of geth rained on them.

"Yeah, sure Lieutenant. Why'd you ask?"- Alenko hadn't shown many emotions to the rest of the crew during his stay on the Normandy, the obvious exceptions being his friend Shepard and the new Gunnery Chief. This made his approach to Garrus even weirder, but he tried not to think too much about it.

"I'm going out too. Shepard and I are going to head by C-Sec and get some new weapons while Wrex takes care of some bounty hunting business and well, it seemed polite to ask if you wanted to tag along. So… wanna come? Unless this is some sort of turian insult, in which case, sorry about that."- Garrus found himself staring at Kaiden like he'd grown an extra pair of talons, or whatever it was that humans had at the end of their fingers. Was the alien in front of him… asking if he wanted to hang out?

"Hum, yes, of course, I'd love to! But why would you take me with you?"- he was still regarding this as a very awkward situation, but luckily for Garrus, Alenko seemed to keep his cool.

"Well, we're going to be testing out some new spectre exclusive weaponry…"- Garrus' eyes suddenly widened when he understood what Kaiden was saying.

"You mean… HMSW prototype gear that only Spectres and associates ever get access to? The one's that are literately the best weapons known in Council Space?"- Garrus was now practically drooling over the idea of getting an all new sniper from the requisitions officer.

"Hehe, Shepard said you'd be interested. So, still want to tag along?"

Garrus stared at Kaiden before lifting his faceplates in the closest thing to a human smile a turian would ever pull.

"Spirits, yes!"

…

Wrex had left the Normandy the second it'd docked. He was mean, he was big, and he was back on the Citadel. Which meant it was time to get a fat paycheck.

He headed by the lower Wards markets, near the place they'd found the wimpy female quarian that had almost gotten herself killed on her first mission, and started looking for a volus. When he found him talking with a notorious blackmailing, scumbag of a salarian merchant named Morlan, things got messy.

"Hello there, volus."- he said while he snapped his knuckles and prepared the blood rage inside him. The salarian instantly gave him a stare and reached for something bellow his desk, but Wrex's cold glare froze him on his tracks.

"Excuse me, but I'm in the middle of something with this gentlem… do I know you?"

Wrex grinned in the most sadistic way he could.

"You do. You just didn't expect to see me here because I'm presumably dead."- he couldn't see the volus' face bellow the suit, but his voice carried in it pure terror.

"Ur… Urdnot Wrex… hello! How… is it that you are doing, I…"

"Shut it Jiye. I heard you were back on the Citadel. I thought I wouldn't see you again after that whole deal with the asari back on Omega. Aria something? He, she reminds me of another asari… I do wonder how Aleena is doing. But anyways, now you're here. Which means I'm getting the money you owe me. Clear enough?"

Suddenly, the salarian interrupted the discussion.

"Excuse me, sir, but I would ask you to refrain from trying to get money out of this leech. He owes me first."

'Oh great.'-Wrex thought, his mind reminding him of the shotgun Shepard had given him after Feros for "Exceptional performance in the field of duty and the gruesome maiming of a platoon of geth". –'Guess things are about to get interesting.'

"Well, chump, you're a merchant. Way I see it, a poor little krogan nobody like me needs the money more than you. So Jiye, hand it over."- he wasn't just going to let a crazy salarian Rockefeller wannabe get his earned, cold hard cash. If the wimp wanted it, he'd have to take it.

"Oh, but please…"- the salarian said, whipping out a fully automatic assault rifle from behind the counter. –" I insist."

Wrex made a mad dash to the side while the salarian started distributing lead throughout the room. Taking cover behind one of the counters, he noticed that one of the bullets had penetrated his armor.

'Shield bypass? Hm, that might be a problem…' Wrex thought, as he extended his shotgun and blitzed out of cover. –'…for someone who's not a Krogan!'

Wrex purposely drew fire on to himself while he ran around the room, the salarian firing nonstop and missing most of his shots. Those that hit only made Wrex madder. Then, after a while, Wrex charged Morlan, sprinting by Jyie, who had hid behind another counter with a turian clerk who just hadn't signed up for this shitty job.

The salarian unloaded a barrage onto Wrex, making him bleed and peeling off armor until… the gun stopped.

"Suck it, asshole!"- Wrex said as he jumped the counter and rammed Morlan onto the wall with such brute force that it cracked. Luckily for the salarian, he was wearing armor at the time, and managed to survive Wrex's blow, even if only momentarily. With Morlan's neck between his hands, Wrex talked again. –"Stupid rookie. Shield bypass means nothing when you sacrifice too much damage. And you need a LOT of damage to kill a krogan. Specially if you're prone to getting your weapon overheated like a dumb pyjak."

Suddenly, with the last of his strengths and amazing speed, Morlan's hand reached the inside of one of his armor's pockets, pulled out a syringe and stabbed Wrex with it, pumping its contents into him.

"What did you just do, salarian?"-Wrex asjked, not fazed in the slightest by the salarian's move. The alien laughed.

"Fool! Now, you are doomed! Your nervous systems will begin to break down, and you will feel pain beyond your worst nightmares! Then, if you beg enough, maybe I'll put you down! IF YOU SCREAM ENOUGH!"- Morlan had now just become a small evil genius. Great. Just what a krogan trying to make a living needed. Without further ado, Wrex began chocking Morlan into submission, disregarding his earlier talk like it was nothing. –"Wa… wait, agh! How… why are… ack! Not… in pain?!"- he managed to let out before passing out.

Wrex looked at his fallen body, still alive. He wasn't worth killing, and C-sec would know how to handle him after his shootout earlier.

He turned back to get Jyie, and then a sudden one liner came up on his mind.

"Redundant nervous systems… bitch."

…

Back at the Specialized Recovery Center for Non Council Species, a krogan bouncer woke up to another krogan entering the room. Confused, he slowly remembered the details that preceded his coma: the raid on Chora's Den, the human spearheading the assault, and Wrex…

The same man that now stood before him.

"Urdnot Wrex… here to finish the job, are you? Well go ahead, I won't plea. Do your worst."- he looked defiantly at the bounty hunter, challenging him to get it over with. Instead, the bullet, blow or poison never came. Instead, only words.

"You fought well. You worked for a putrid human maggot, but you fought for honor. Courage. You were a true krogan."- as he said this, Wrex put a wallet down on a table besides the bouncer's hospital bed.

"What is this? Are you getting soft, old man?"- this seemed to make Wrex chuckle, which lead him to add some detail to why he thought it was funny.

"Maybe I am. I'm travelling with aliens on a mission to save the galaxy, but I grow old. And an old man needs allies. And this old man needs you."

"Me? What could I do to help you? You're the one that put me here in the first place!"- he was pissed that after getting shot at, the man who shot him was asking for help. But, like all krogan, he had respected the feats that Urdnot Wrex was said to have accomplished, and felt honored to be asked to help such an illustrious, true krogan.

"More than you know. I hold your clan in high regard. There's a storm coming. And the krogan must prepare if we are to survive. Take the wallet. Use the credit chit. Go back to Tuchanka and prepare. When I return, we shall do great things together."

"Prepare for what, Wrex?"- the bouncer asked.

A small pause dangled in the air for a second.

"A united krogan. Starting with your clan. You will stand strong with clan Urdnot. And I will make clan Nakmor great again. This I swear, for the life I owe you when you killed my father."


	15. Tales of the Normandy

…

"Hey there, spacer, can I get you anything?"-the asari bartender at Chora's Den asked Joker. The Alliance pilot had decided it was about time he had some fun outside of the Normandy and decided to head to a club to let some steam off, and he was regretting that decision more and more with every passing second.

"No, thanks, I'm good. Just trying to wind off. Doesn't seem to be working."- for a while, he'd thought of ordering a drink and losing himself in the music, but decided that he just wasn't in the mood for it. The bartender then looked at him with an interested expression.

"You sure? Because you seem like you could use a girl and some booze. Trust me, I'm five hundred years old."- Joker mentally laughed at the idea that a five hundred year old asari looked like a thirty-year-old human by comparison. He chuckled a bit before replying.

"Thanks miss, but no thanks. I was just about to set out anyway, they're probably waiting for me back at the ship…"- from the corner of his eye, he saw something that caught his interest, and turned back to the asari while pointing at something behind her. –"You know what? I do want something before I go. How much is that bottle?"

The asari turned around and smiled before replying.

"You have good taste. Let's make it fifty creds and call it a day, hum?"

"Thank you. I know a person who is just going to looove this."- Joker paid up and headed out, carrying under his arm a large bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy.

…

"So, how much for the pistol?"- Shepard asked the requisitions officer as he examined the masterly crafted handgun. Even though Garrus was in a corner drooling over a super-light anti-material rifle, Shepard needed a weapon that could be used by the entirety of the team and was cheap enough for them not to go completely broke.

"Well Commander, from the looks of it you have enough money to buy… one exemplar. Wow, you must be rich as all hell."- Shepard chocked on what the officer had just said. Over a hundred and fifty thousand credits… could only afford a single pistol?!

"I'm sorry, but are you saying that these weapons cost so much that not even Spectres can buy them?"

"Well, I'm sorry too Commander, but it sure seems that way. You either pop out some extra cash or there's nothing I can do for you. If it's any consolation, I've always thought it was stupid for Spectre's to be forced into buying their own equipment."- Shepard sighed profusely before putting the gun back in its place. However, when he turned back, he found Garrus and Kaiden looking at him with what could only be described as "puppy eyes".

"Come on guys, you know there's nothing I can do. We need that money for armor upgrades and food."-their incessant glare of pure innocence was really bothering Shepard.

"But the gun… it's so good… and you're not getting me a sniper rifle…"- Garrus faintly whispered, much to Shepard's dismay. He really did want the weapon, but it was so expensive…

"Garrus, don't you dare do this to me. We thought it'd be cool if you tagged along because I never even thought this might happen, and that's that. Right Kaiden?"- he turned to the Lieutenant, only to find the same heartbreaking stare in his eyes. –"Oh, come on, not you too!"

"Shepard, I'm not judging, you know that… but you know I haven't trained with many weapons, and that pistol could come in really handy… Pretty please?"- Shepard took a single step back and tried to think of a way out of the situation. With sweat pouring down his face, he decided it was best to face the problem head on.

"This is not happening right now! I am not buying that gun! Only one of us could actually use it, and we already have the best gear we can find outside of this shop. No means no!"- at that point, Garrus and Kaiden lost their gaze and shifted to a more bummed out and aggressive pose, crossing their arms in front of their chests.

'Crap.'- Shepard thought. 'Now you've done it. You've stirred the bees nest John.'

"Cheapskate."-they both mumbled at the same time, leaving a flustered Shepard with the task of finding a way to motivate them again. He thought fast, and talked faster, gesturing over to the counter as he spoke.

"Look, if I get you some lower class weapons _and_ improvements to your armor, will you please go back to your usual selves?"-they looked at him for a while, then at each other, before nodding in agreement. He sighed in relief, and inwardly celebrated his victory, if you could call it that.

"Yeah, that seems ok with me."-Garrus said, looking at the Commander with an appeased stance. 'One down, now I only need to see if the other's persuaded', Shep thought.

"Those upgrades better be damn good Shepard."-Kaiden added, before heading out to select the best upgrades within budget that they could buy, leaving behind a happy Commander and a content turian. Well, until Garrus approached Shepard one more time, gently but firmly placing a hand on his shoulder.

"You know, I saw some state of the art medical upgrades back there, and I thought you'd get some for the whole team. We appreciate the helping hand, Commander!"- suddenly, Garrus disappeared from his side, leaving a baffled Commander behind to think on what he had just compromised to.

Shepard could only sigh as he predicted the hellish beating his wallet was about to get.

…

"Hey there, miss Zorah. What are you up to?"- Engineer Adams, the chief engineer of the Normandy asked her as she tapped into a console near the Normandy's drive core, where she usually hanged out.

"Oh, chief Adams! Good to see you sir. I was just putting in some new codes, I noticed a bit of a discrepancy between the eezo consumption rates and the engine propulsion, so I thought that maybe I could alter some things… I'm sorry, I thought it would be okay with you."- she started fidgeting her fingers while she was talking, a clear indication that she felt uneasy. She tried stopping it, but a nervous habit isn't so easily put down. However, she stopped when she heard Adams laugh faintly.

"I wasn't going to judge you, Tali, I think you're more than capable of handling yourself, so no need to justify everything you do around here. Also, call me Adams and drop the whole 'chief' thing. It makes me feel old."- his words were of comfort, and Tali eased up a bit after hearing them. Seeing her relaxed, he continued his inquiry. –"So, why are you here?"

"What do you mean, chi… Adams, sorry. So, what do you mean, Adams? Is there some other console in which I should be doing this?"- she got a bit nervous again, but she decided that she wasn't going to be a scared little quarian anymore and stood up to herself.

"No, not at all. I was asking why you were here in the Normandy with good old me instead of out there with your charismatic Commander?"- Tali's composure was instantly lost when Adams spoke.

"What do you mean? I didn't… I mean… yeah, he's charismatic, but so what?"- she heard another faint chuckle before Adams continued.

"Relax, Tali, I'm not here to judge. Besides, I actually appreciate your efforts towards the crew. But you should know, Shepard does quite clearly enjoy your company."- Tali perked right up as Adams finished his sentence.

"He does? I mean… why would he? How'd you know, chie… Adams, sorry."

"Well, besides from our talks down here about your work with the engines and his constant compliments to your technological prowess, I'd say he just likes to hang around someone who he can talk to. You know, informally. Besides, he's quite a different person from that unstoppable hero of tale that people associate to him. But I guess you already knew that."- Tali silently remembered the day she had first joined the Normandy crew. Shepard had opened up to her with his story about Elysium and losing his squad. She'd figured that there was more to his story than he had told her, but she hadn't pressed him over such a painful subject. 'If he wanted me to know, I'd know', she thought. Snapping out of her recollection, Tali nodded at the man in front of her.

"Yes, he's much more of a… what to call it… person than the general public would have it. He's kind, and clever and…"

"Totally and completely interested in knowing you better."- Adams interrupted, much to her surprise. Shepard wanted to know her better? She wanted to know him better! She prepared to ask why, but she remembered her earlier talks with Shepard. The kindness, the fondness, the happiness they brought her. Did she really need to know all the details behind his apparent interest in her, or at the very least for the quarian culture? No, she decided.

"Are you absolutely sure, sir?"- she asked him, her voice suddenly overflowing with courage.

"Yes, Tali. Now go on, he should be getting back soon. I'll take care of your things for you."-Adams stepped forward and took a quick glance at the screen she'd been working on. –"Nothing I can't handle."

"Thank you… Adams. I won't forget this!"- she said, hurrying out of the room and back at the elevator. Adams looked at her running form and spoke only after she left.

"Just have fun out there kid… things are about to get messy out there. I can feel it."

…

Wrex had returned to the Normandy in a shameful state. Although most of his injuries from his fight with the salarian had healed, he was still bleeding from some wounds. He wasn't preoccupied though; his body would just produce more blood and patch him up. The miracle of krogan physiology.

Still, he was bleeding everywhere and making a mess on the ship's floor. He didn't like the idea of getting patched up, but he liked the idea of getting Shepard pissed at him for spreading dark orange stuff all over the CIC even less. So, he decided to head to the medbay and have doctor Chakwas take a look at him.

When he entered the room, still with his battle armor on and a few spots of blood over him, the doctor's first instinct was to pull a pistol and train it on him. Luckily for her, Wrex didn't react and after a while, she put the gun down. Then, he spoke.

"Doctor."

"Wrex."

"I seem to have a bit of a problem with some internal bleeding… think you could fix that for me, human? Wouldn't want to get the ship all messy."- his attitude was that of someone who didn't give half a crap about what was going on; he just wanted to get it over with. Luckily, the doctor was already used to treating stubborn, malcontent patients. Wrex then headed to one of the hard examination tables and lied down.

"Alright, then, you tough krogan bastard. What have you got yourself here?"- Chakwas approached the krogan and took a look at the holes in his armor. 'Bloody mess, that's what this is. And the smell!' –"Special shield penetrating bullets, from the look of it. It hit a few blood vessels and the shrapnel from your armor is keeping it from healing. Lucky for you, it's manageable. Unluckily, you'll probably experience great discomfort."- she put a scalpel into one of the wounds and removed a small shard from it. The krogan didn't even flinch.

It took her about fifteen minutes to clear it all, patch him up and get him ready to go. As she was removing the shards, she decided to inquire about the origin of the wounds.

"So, how'd you manage to get so beaten up that you had to run to a human to fix your problem?"- Wrex looked at her with boredom before replying, all while she gently maneuvered yet another shard from within his body.

"You think this is banged up? This barely hurt me. I could have regenerated all alone, I just wanted to get the wounds closed not to get the floor dirty for when Shepard arrives."- he said, his voice conveying nothing more than an absolute sternness of spirit.

"Still, enlighten me on how you managed to get shot at in a leisure run to the Citadel."- Wrex had sparked the good doctor's curiosity, and she wasn't about to let him get away that easily. The krogan scratched his head before continuing.

"None of your damn business, lady. I appreciate the help, but I'm not going to tell you my life story just like that."- she thought about giving up, but decided she had gone too far to back off now. The krogan would interpret that as a sign of weakness, and that wouldn't be good if she ever needed his respect. She straightened her back, went in for another shard, and kept talking.

"It is now, or very soon I'll make it the Commander's business. And something tells me you wouldn't want that."- she looked at the krogan directly in the eye as she withdrew the last piece of shrapnel from his body.

"Great, another human hardass. Just what I needed. Look, doc, I tell you this, it never leaves the room, understand?"-he didn't seem preoccupied at all by her inquiry, but looks could be deceiving.

"Doctor-patient confidentiality. So, what happened?"-she asked him, and the large krogan began to talk.

"So, there was this dumbass volus named Jyie…"

…

 _Time: Unknown. Location: Unknown. Status: Alive_

 _That was all the info her omni-tool gave her. She'd been stuck down there for what, a day? Two days? It felt like it had been… forever. Time outside the field that held her seemed to move differently. At first, she'd noticed how dust outside seemingly passed so rapidly. Then, some time later, a krogan had arrived, and with him, strange metallic creatures she had surmised were geth._

 _His words had been swift, like he was in a hurry to get her out of there, but she knew there was no point in attempting to break free from the invisible shackles that held her. Only the console could make them disappear, that one, small console, so far, yet so close, she felt like if she tried enough, she could just barely reach it…_

 _But to no avail. The field, and her shackles, would stay shut. She turned back to the krogan, but he had already left. Now, only the geth remained, looking, probing, evaluating. A small group of them made their way inside, planting explosives, testing the field, searching for ways to take it down or move around it, their moves precise, their sounds menacing. Then, they looked at her with cold, dead eyes, and she wanted to scream, to cry out for help, so that someone, please, someone, anyone, come and rescue her._

 _Yet no help came._

…

"Hey doc! Look at what… oh, hi Wrex."- Joker said as he entered the medbay, his eagerness and joy quickly being replaced by an inconspicuous fear of getting his bones broken at the hands of a bulky alien with a temper.

"Jeff, hello. I was just getting done with Wrex, please, come in."- she signaled for him to come inside and he reluctantly agreed. She then turned back to the krogan. –"Remember, you ever need some extra little something for crazy stunts like that…"

"Take the red pills, I know, I know, human. Jeez, you don't have to say it a million times."-Wrex said, taking a small jar from the doctors hand and having his omni-tool process it into his armor. –"Well, I should go now. Thank you for the helping hand, doctor. I promise not to kill you if I ever get hired to whack the Normandy's crew. I'll still make you disappear, but I won't kill you."- Wrex then smiled a bit and left the room, brushing by Joker with a loud "Humph".

"Charming."- Doctor Chakwas said as she watched him leave, her arms crossed and her gaze fixed on the krogan's back. Then, she turned to Jeff."- "So, what can I do for you? Your medication isn't due to be over for at least three more weeks."

Finally getting a chance to speak, Joker took a step closer to the doctor and talked.

"It's nothing like that doc. Guess what I found out there."- Chakwas looked curiously over at Joker, then, she tried peeking behind his back to see what he was holding. Not containing himself anymore, Joker brought the bottle up and handed it to her.

"What is… Dear gods, is that Serrice Ice Brandy? Jeff, where did you find this?!"- she was surprised, but most of all, grateful. She loved the beverage, and Joker had gone out of his way to give her something. Maybe that meant that he did care.

"I was doing some, huh, visual research by Choras' Den, when I found that bottle. I thought you'd like it."- Joker was clearly happy. His relationship with the doctor had been a friendly one since they'd met each other, but she had acted as a bit of a mother figure too after Jeff's own mom passed away. As a result, they were quite friendly towards each other, and considered themselves good friends.

"Of course I like it, you idiot! You know it reminds me of home…"- Chakwas mind stepped into nostalgia as she remembered her small family house in the countryside back on Earth, where she'd drink with her parents before flying off to med school and later, to the aid of the military.

"Well, I hope you can spare some for a young, charismatic pilot."- Joker said, pulling two chairs from his side.

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea if you're going to be flying soon, Jeff."- Chakwas said. Nonetheless, she poured the liquor onto two glasses, which she had gotten from a cabinet in the adjacent room.

"Well, what's the point of living if you can't have some fun, right?"

…

Tali was regretting every single second of her life as she stood by the airlock waiting for Shepard. 'What where you thinking? What are you going to say when he comes through? Oh, hi Shepard, I heard you were interested in knowing me better, want to date? Haaaaaa, you're so stupid, Tali'Zorah. Just leave now, and spare yourself the embarrassment.'

However, Tali didn't leave. What drove her to stay, she wouldn't know for quite some time. It wasn't courage, because she was losing that by the minute. It wasn't pride either, even though that would have explained a lot. No, Tali stayed for some other reason. And that reason was Shepard.

She suddenly heard voices in the airlock, and she started twirling her fingers out of anxiety. But she stood her ground, and when the airlock opened, she faced Shepard.

He looked at her with surprise, and then joy. She blushed profusely and felt her cheeks get hot, and when she tried to speak, she choked on her words. But then, Shepard spoke the most reassuring words possible.

"Tali. I was about to go looking for you."


	16. Hunt for Intelligence

…

Tali and Shepard happily giggled in the small space the crew used for meals as they ate their respective foods, both of them sitting down on opposite ends of the table. While Shepard ate a dehydrated steak, Tali was forced to use an emergency induction port and take a few concentrated nutrition pills.

"So, what do those taste like?"- Shepard asked his quarian friend as she enjoyed her meal. He was curious to know if they were like the food the old 21st century astronauts back on Earth ate, which was compressed, processed and dehydrated into a small pill-like object or a strange, murky paste.

"Oh, this? Well, it tastes like a… oh right, you don't have those on Earth. Hum… there's really nothing I can associate it, unless you've had dextro foodstuffs. Sorry."- Tali seemed to be enjoying herself, but she was having trouble lightening up. Then again, so was Shepard, even though both of them were oblivious to the other's stance.

"Hehehe, no worries. Besides, if it's anything like asari cooking, it tastes like chicken."- Shepard had expected to hear laughter, but remembered that she wouldn't know what a chicken was when she tipped her head gently to her side, as if indicating she did not know what he was referring to. Embarrassed, he tried explaining himself as quickly as he could. –"Right, sorry. Forgot you were an alien. A chicken is sort of a bird… Well, it's kind of complicated to explain if you've never seen anything like that."

Tali straightened her pose and looked at Shepard. He stared deeply into her eyes, those almond shaped white eyes, and saw a hint of surprise in them. He wished he could stare at her like this forever. But before he lost himself in his thoughts, she spoke.

"You… wow. Shepard that's… so sweet of you. You mean… you'd actually consider me as an equal, and not just some alien thing?"- Tali's heart was beating heavily, and she was starting to get all giddy from their talk, but she talked herself out of breaking into an anxious wreck by sheer willpower alone.

Shepard stared at her, trying to interpret what she had just said. Did she think he looked down on her? He respected her more than almost everyone else, and hadn't taken her for a lesser being once. He reached out to grab her hand, but his brain reminded him that he was supposed to be playing it cool and professional, so he retracted his hand before she could notice.

"Tali, you know what my stance is on that. You're a sweet, smart, downright amazing of a person, and the fact that you're quarian will never change my view of who you are. And if anyone ever tells you the contrary, then they're wrong."- again, she stared at his eyes and he lost his train of thought. She looked at that man, trying to change her point of view, trying to prove to her that there were reasonable people out there, people willing to accept the quarians, accept her, not as an inferior species, but as people. Even though she'd gotten her fair share of racism and discrimination during her Pilgrimage, Shepard made her hope for a better future.

"Thank you, Commander. It means a lot to me."

'You mean a lot to me.'- she thought, but quickly remembered that any relationship she could possibly have with him would be strictly platonic and shunned such thoughts. She would not fall for a human that she could never be with, no matter how dreamy he was. Yet, she looked at him one more time, and felt her heart melt as she saw his broad smile.

Shepard on the other hand, obviously not knowing her thoughts, started forming a mental image of the two of them together. 'Come on Shep, you barely know the girl! How could you possibly already be interested in her? Besides, she's younger than you _and_ a quarian! How could she possibly ever be interested in such a strange human idiot such as yourself? It's better to just try to let her go. Even if… she is sort of perfect…'

They sat there for what seemed to be a long time, just taking in each other's form, when suddenly, Tali felt a bit dizzy and couldn't contain a yawn.

'Oh, keelah, I did not just do that in front of him. This is terrible!'

'Did she just yawn? That was the most adorable thing ever. I wonder if the ship's VI recorded it?'

"I'm so sorry Shepard, that was totally a mood killer… Wait, no, that's not what I meant, I mean, what I want to say is, hum, that was unprofessional, and, and… You're not angry at all are you?"

"Why would I? That yawn was the cutest thing I've heard all day."

'Oh crap. You just put a nail in your coffin buddy. Quick, find a way out of this before she…'

"Well, thank you for the input Commander, I'll jot it down…"- Tali said with a sultry tone she did not think she had. How had she pulled it off? Why had she pulled it off? Why was it so hard for her to stay emotionally unattached to this man? She quickly tried to change the subject, managing to do so in an inconspicuous manner. –"I've just been having trouble sleeping recently. It's nothing serious, I guess, but it bugs me."

A million thoughts coursed through Shepard's mind as he picked his words carefully.

"What's the matter? Are the pods bothering you?"-he asked with worry evident in his voice.

"No, nothing like that. It's just that human sleep cycles and quarian cycles are different and, well… The ship's too quiet."

"Wait, say that again?"-Shepard seemed surprised at her revelation. 'She thinks it's weird too?'

"Well, back on the Fleet, all the ships are very noisy, at least the one I lived in, the Rayya. The old gear was quite noisy, and whenever it was quiet, it meant that an engine or an air filter had stopped."-the mention of an air filter made Tali unwillingly shiver as she remembered her mother's ill fate.

"Wow, I didn't think anyone besides me would eve have that problem. You and I have more in common than one might think."- Shepard added out of the blue. Tali was surprised; such a coincidence was highly unlikely.

"You mean, it also bothers you?"

"Yeah, it does. Even though I could do without the voices of the crew when I'm asleep, I grew up on spaceships. With time, I became accustomed to the sound of engines and reactors. Sleeping on the Normandy was a pain until I got the Captain's quarters. They're right above a loud fuel pipe, and whenever we're on trans-system FTL, I take some time off and get some sleep. Usually it makes the situation better. And I'll admit I may have recorded some of it for when I really need to take a nap. Help yourself to it if you like, I can patch it through to your omni-tool."

Tali was dumbfounded for a while. This man must have been some sort of archetype of perfection sent to compensate her for years and years of being stuck in the Fleet. She gladly nodded, and Shepard proceeded to send her the files. Playing them for a bit, she found the sound to be just as relaxing as the one's she was used to in the Rayya.

"Thanks Shepard, this will come in really handy. I wish there was a way I could compensate you."

"Well, there might be a way."- Shepard said with a sly smile, looking straight at Tali with a mischievous expression.

"Oh, and what might that be, Commander?"- again, the sultriness in her voice came naturally, yet this time, it felt… right.

"Now that you ask, Miss Zorah, we're heading to the Armstrong Nebula. Apparently the geth have a few outposts there and I need an exceptionally good technician for Mako repairs. Sounds familiar?"- Shepard put emphasis on his request, and Tali knew it was an offer she could not turn down.

"Whatever it takes to get you to take me to nice places."

…

 _Two days later, Solcrum, Grissom System, Armstrong Nebula_

"Garrus, get that turret running now!"- Shepard yelled over to the turian as he drove the Mako around, precariously dodging plasma shots fired at him by a pair of geth colossi. Garrus quickly started dishing out some damage, taking one of their shields down and putting a shell from the main gun directly where the colossus' power core was.

Without time to celebrate, they jumped a hill as Shepard tried to maneuver past the rockets fired by geth rocket troopers providing support to the remaining colossus. He was hit twice, which made him curse over his terrible driving, but Tali swiftly yelled.

"Shields are dropping, but I can keep them up for a lot longer if we don't take any major hits! Just don't use the turbo boost upwards!"

Shepard went to thank her when he saw another rocket buzz by. Making the Mako turn ninety degrees, he went over a slope and pointed the fornt of the Mako directly at the group of troopers. Garrus didn't need a second chance: he shot the weapon and instantly took all three geth troopers out. Now, only the colossus remained.

The mechanical beast turned to them and prepared its plasma discharge once more. Shepard wouldn't have time to dodge it if he just turned, so his hand instinctively reached over to the boost controls. However, he remembered Tali's warning, and made a split second call to endure the hit.

It paid off. The geth colossus' blast was dispersed throughout the Mako's shields, giving Garrus just enough time to spray it down with the machine gun and put another well-timed shell into the metallic frame of his opponent. The fuming corpse was left lying motionless on the floor, and soon enough, the squad exited the Mako to reach the entrance of the underground base.

"Nice shots Garrus. Glad I brought you along."- Shepard said, approaching the entrance and taking the elevator down. Somehow, despite all of the galaxies marvelous technologies, elevators were still slower than a granny trying to cross the street.

"That's just how I roll, Commander. And that was some fancy driving back there to. Surprised me since… you know, your track record for driving the Mako isn't properly pretty…"

"What are you trying to imply there, Vakarian? Something I should know?"- Shepard asked with a straight face, however knowing fully well that he was the one living thing on the galaxy that could flip a Mako that many times.

"For all of our sakes, yes, I hope you've realized you're terrible at it. Maybe let the missy here do the driving next time. At least then she'd help out a bit more."- Garrus looked over to Tali. She was quiet, which was unusual when she was around Shepard, but Garrus didn't pay too much attention. He felt the quarian was an useful asset, and all around a nice person, but he couldn't help but judge her a bit for her people's reputation, even if he didn't want to, which was clearly reflecting on his attitude.

"Tali, please tell Garrus why were able to tank a geth colossus shot earlier."- Shepard calmly replied, eager to defend Tali's honor. He would have done the same for any teammate, of course, but the fact that it was Tali just threw a bit more salt into the wound.

"Well, if you must know, Vakarian, I made those shields sturdier. The only reason you even managed to pull those shots off were because of me redirecting power to shields and weaponry and amplifying it with my own omni-tool. You're welcome."-suddenly, she brushed away her apparent shyness, and rapidly took a more determined pose, which made her look like she was not joking around. Garrus planed on replying, but then looked at the shotgun she had on her hands and quickly decided it was probably best if he just shut up.

Arriving at the geth base, Shepard cast a barrier over his shields and prepared his pistol for a rapid fire and extremely accurate mode called "Marksman mode", or just "Marksman". Entering the room adjacent to the one they were in, they took cover behind a few crates and assessed the situation. Three geth destroyers patrolled the area, with a geth sapper commanding two geth stalkers from the ceiling to surprise unexpected guests and a geth Juggernaut scouting the area from a balcony on the second floor. Shepard quietly signaled his team to let them in on his plan of action, and with a swift movement, commenced the raid on the base.

…

"Jackpot."-Shepard said as he cracked the geth data terminal. Tali watched as he collected all the information he could with his omni-tool and sent it to the Alliance. Now was her chance. She could easily hack into his tool, make a copy of the data he was extracting, and send it back to the Admiralty board so she could end her Pilgrimage.

So why didn't she?

Tali thought long about this as they returned to the Normandy, the crew cheering them on for another job well done. She pretended to be happy, but she could not understand her own actions, and this confused her far more than she could imagine, than she could bear. Finally, with no other explanation, she reached the inevitable conclusion: she could never betray Shepard's trust. She had become so attached to the man, the kind marine who had treated her like a normal person, like any other member of the crew, like a _friend_ , that she could not backstab him like that. She would rather search for another Pilgrimage gift instead of stealing from the man… the man she loved.

With a stunning realization, Tali finally understood just how profoundly infatuated he was with the Commander. She would give her honor, a chance to make her people proud up, to do the right thing and not cheat him. Even still, she was reluctant to accept these feelings, as she knew that they just couldn't be together if he ever even loved her back. She was trapped under the damn suit, and she would carry that curse to her grave.

She then realized the repercussions of stealing the data. If she did get her hands on the data, that would mean her Pilgrimage gift had been found and that she would, without a doubt, need to go back to the Fleet and leave him, and the Normandy crew, behind.

To take her mind of things, she started working again down on Engineering, but her gut feeling didn't let her rest while she didn't talk to Shepard.

…

After yet another great job, the Commander set course to Therum and decided to go talk with his crew members. He got a quick praise from Kaiden, a complaint for not letting them be there from Ashley and Wrex, a surprising fist pump from Garrus (he must have been reading up on human pop culture) and finally, he went to talk with Tali.

"Hey, Tali. Great job out there."-he said as he stepped inside the room, that characteristic sly smile on his face as he approached her.

"Hello Shepard. Good to see you."-Tali said somberly. Shepard realized almost immediately that there was something wrong with her. He thought if he should ask, and decided it was worth a go.

"Is everything ok? You look down. Are you feeling ok?"

"Yes, sure, everything's fine. It's just… I… keelah, how do I put this. Remember… remember our earlier talks about my Pilgrimage? How I was expected to bring along a great gift because of who my father is?"

"Sure I do, it was the day I understood you were a techie expert _and_ a quarian princess. What about it?"- Tali giggled a bit despite of what was on her mind and tried to lighten the mood a bit before her request.

"You _bosh'tet_ , you know that's not how it works and I hate it when you call me that."

"Then why are you smilling?"- Shepard asked, seeing right through her. For a second, she imagined him seeing her without her mask, staring deeply into her actual, genuine smile…

"How'd you know? I have a visor on!"

"Lucky guess. So… for real, what's going on? Can I help?"- now Tali had to be extremely delicate about how she put things.

"Yes, as a matter of a fact you can. I wanted to talk with you… about something you found earlier on the mission…"- Shepard suddenly switched from his broad smile to a smaller, sadder one. He knew what she wanted. And he knew what it meant.

"You want the geth data I found earlier to complete your Pilgrimage, don't you?"-he asked, much to Tali's surprise. It took her a moment, but she regained her composure and sadly replied.

"Yes… that's exactly it."

"And that means you would leave us…"- Shepard seemed sadder than ever as he said this, and Tali regretted ever bringing the subject up. But she had come to far. She couldn't back out now.

"When Saren is dead, and the Reapers stopped, I will return to my people. But until then Shepard, I _will_ keep my oath. I will stay with you and help, or die trying."

There was a moment of silence as Shepard stood there. Finally, he reached over to his omni-tool and started transferring the data.

"I would never do anything to stop you or harm your future Tali. If this is what you need… I'll hand it over for as long as you want it."

Shepard then turned around and left, leaving behind a speechless, but nonetheless grateful Tali, and a copy of the geth data.

As he left, he cried a single tear of sorrow.


	17. The author was lazy

_Authors note: Hi, everyone, it's your good old Porygonman here! So peeps, is everyone ok out there? Great!_

 _So anyway, I wanted to thank all you readers out there. I've been talking to some people about the story, and I'm getting a lot of friendly replies and reviews. This piece of work, which I must admit, gives me great pleasure to write, has been keeping me active in what otherwise would be shitty weekends filled with homework. And, since I've been to Comicon this week (yup, I wrote this chapter while I was waiting in lines, so that's why it's small), I've freshened up some ideas and regained some of that sweet, juicy inspiration._

 _But back to the point. What I'm trying to say is: YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME, THANK YOU!_

 _So please, enjoy this next chapter, and as always, see you tomorrow._

…

Ashley wasn't too sure what was going on when she saw Shepard storming out of the Engineering room, but she figured it wasn't good. She was waiting for a reply from her sister Sarah on video chat, but the comm buoys were malfunctioning and the signal wasn't getting through. So, she decided to leave it for later and went to join Shepard as he entered the elevator.

As soon as he saw her come up, what had seemed like a grim face to Ash only seconds ago turned to a small smile. 'Jesus, Shepard, you sure know how to hide yourself for the sake of others.'-she thought.

"Commander, wait!"-she called out, and quickly joined him on the elevator. –"Thank you sir."

"Williams. How are you doing? Weren't you supposed to be on Mako repairs?"- Shepard said, not in an haughty way, but with a bit of bitterness in his voice still, even if he tried to hide it behind his happy, compassionate look. 'What's gotten into you Commander?"

"Ga… Vakarian said he'd step in for me sir. He doesn't want anyone messing up his 'calibrations', so he took my shift."-this time, Shepard's eyes glinted a bit, and she saw him regain a bit of his casual smile back.

"Heh, did he now? That turian will be the end of us, I tell you. At least you're getting along now. What changed?"

Ash was glad that she had changed Shepard's mood, but now she had to keep it up until she found what was behind his unusual state. Because there was definitely something behind his state. Call it woman's intuition, but she knew something was up.

"Well, while you were out playing 'mass murder the geth', me, Wrex and Kaiden where left back here to root for you guys. We didn't really have much to do, so we just talked most of the time, you know, to avoid boredom and all. Well, mostly me and Kaiden, Wrex just stood in his corner looking menacingly at us and sending the occasional death threat our way."- the elevator had now stopped at its destination, and Shepard signaled for Ashley to get out first in a gentlemanly fashion. He was clearly enjoying the conversation from the look on his eyes and his change in body language.

"That does sound like Wrex. Luckily for you, he's big talk and no bite most of the time. Except if he's angry. Or if his job is to kill you. Then he does a hell of a lot more than just biting. But that still doesn't explain the change of heart."-they walked a bit towards the stairs and they stopped at the bottom to speak. They both acknowledged that the CIC was definitely not the place for personal chatter, so they decide to just stay there.

"I was getting to that. So, me and Kaiden were talking about the alien crew, and I showed him my point of view. Then, all of the sudden, he laughed at me! At first I was pissed, thought he was making fun od me and my views like most alien lovers… no offense, by the way, Commander… but then he said I reminded him of you when you were younger. Because of the batarians… you know… before the Blitz…"-Ashley proceeded to facepalm herself in her mind. 'Trying to get the man up, and you remind him of the single, biggest massacre he's ever witnessed? Great job Ash, ten outta ten.'

"Hey, how'd you know that? As Alenko been telling stories about me again? He said he was gonna keep it personal!"- Ashley thanked God for him overlooking her mistake, and sighed inwardly in relief.

"Well, he didn't mention anything about that. He said that you used to be like me… treating most aliens with a certain… let's call it slight distrust. Is it true?"- Shepard slightly smiled while letting a small "humph" from his mouth. He seemed to not like remembering the old days. Ashley tried to change the subject, but Shepard had already started talking.

"Yes. Yes it is. One of the reasons I don't understand how so many people look up to me. I was willing to judge people for their species, color of skin, planet of origin, instead of for who they are. Big mistake. The Blitz proved that to me. But please… let's not talk more about it… I lost more than my innocence back there…"

"I know. She was special, wasn't she?"- Ashley asked Shepard, and saw a look of surprise on his face. Then he gave another sad smile, and he returned.

"So… he told you about that to, uh?"

"Shepard… even I can tell it wasn't your fault."-he looked at her disapprovingly. He wasn't mad at her, he was mad at himself. She saw him reach inside his pocket, and take a small chain-like object from inside.

"All I have left is the locket I gave her. She still had it with her when… yeah. I'm guessing he told you about my family too?"- Ashley had to nod in disagreement. Kaiden had already been skeptical about the Elisyum story. She knew he valued his friendship with Shepard too much to tell her any truly important detail. Seeing her answer, Shep proceeded. –"Well, that's another story in and on itself. But I really don't want to talk about it. What about you? You were still telling me how you came to trust aliens."

Ashley noticed his unease, even though he tried to remain strong and hide it. Had he lost someone else close to him? She then agreed with his idea to change the subject. It wasn't her place to judge what he had been through or told her. He was her Commanding officer, and nothing more… well, maybe she wanted him to be more, but he seemed pretty oblivious to it.

"Right. So, Kaiden starts talking about alien culture and all, and I remain unconvinced. And then, all of the sudden, I hear this laugh from across the deck and I see a hulking krogan moving towards us. I thought Wrex had finally lost it, but before I could get my rifle the krogan was already speaking of how "weak little pyjaks" the other cultures were and how "proud and strong" the krogan once were. For hours upon hours, he spoke of krogan architecture, art, and gastronomy… literature even! They had some actually interesting poetry!"-Shepard burst into laughing when he imagined Wrex in a costume reciting Shakespeare, and threatening to maim someone in the crowd if they didn't like it. Ashley smiled and congratulated herself on a job well done.

"Wrex? _Poetry?_ Two words I never thought could be associated. Tell me more, I'm dying to hear."

"Well, then not to stay behind, I recite some poetry too.

But the raven still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling,  
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird and bust and door;  
Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking  
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore -  
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore  
Meant in croaking `Nevermore.'"

Shepard seemed amused at hearing her recite. When she stopped, he clapped and she took a deep bow.

"Edgar Allan Poe. Beautiful."-he said, as she regained her usual self, leaving behind the drama and sorrow of the poem.

"I see you know a thing or two about poetry. The raven. My favorite poem of all time."

"Sorrowful, are we?"

"I could ask you the same question."-she saw Shepard react in an unusual way, as he grabbed his left shoulder with his right hand and tried to laugh her claims off. Again, he changed the subject back to her story:

"And what about your story? How did Wrex react?"

"He said he didn't know what a raven was, but he'd just have shot it when he saw it. Still, he did admit the musicality was nice. As much as you can expect from someone who thrives when singing hardened battle-songs ."

"I take it you started getting along after that?"-Shepard inquired with renewed curiosity.

"Not quite, but it did make me wonder. If even a krogan can appreciate poetry of all things, maybe I've been seeing this the wrong way. I mean, I still think that if there's ever the need to chose between them or us, we'll choose us and they'll choose them, but at least now I can see them more as… human, I'd guess. Which leaves me in the awful position to apologize to everyone who ever heard me say that I couldn't tell the animals from the aliens."-she expected him to look at her disapprovingly, but once again, he surprised her and just smiled. Not sadly anymore, but genuinely smiling.

"Well, miss Williams, that's one heck of a start."

…

"Alright Commander, get set, we'll be passing over the drop zone in ten minutes tops!"-Joker said through the intercom as he approached the research site on Therum. Shepard finished putting his new, badass shiny armor and replied as he went to the lower deck.

"Roger that, Joker. Call the rest of the team and tell them to get ready for final preparations."

"One step ahead of you, Commander. They're already waiting for you by the Mako."-Joker sounded a bit cocky over the comms, but Shepard didn't mind. He didn't know what it was about the pilot that he liked, but Jeff's "charming" personality had captivated him enough to take all sorts of crap from the pilot. Luckily for him, Joker still didn't know that.

"Thanks Joker. Shepard out."

He exited the elevator and saw that to his right, the team was already waiting for him on top of the Mako. All _five_ of them.

"Hum, guys? You know that this will be a small "go in, get out" kind of mission, right?"-he said, clearly confused at the sight before him. He glanced over Tali, and thought about talking to her again, hearing her, trying to explain why he had stormed out of the room… but he needed to focus on the mission at hand. When they had Dr. T'soni, then they could worry about personal relationships.

Kaiden stepped forward and interpolated Shepard.

"Not anymore it's not. Tali and I found a few geth encrypted signals originating from the planet surface. They're here in a bulk and you're going to need all our help."

"Besides, you haven't taken me and Wrex along for a fun chat yet. We're starting to think you don't care."-Ashley said from the back, making everyone look at her, some amused, some disapproving, and one other wanting to viciously tear her in half. Shepard sighed when he understood that they had full control over the situation, but he couldn't let them undermine his authority.

"Alright, but I'll need an assigned squad team and a set team protecting the Mako when we get to the base. We don't all go in, but we act as a team. Are we clear?"

"Sir, yes sir!"-everyone yelled in unison except for one, grumpy old dinosaur.

"Yeah, yeah, let's just get this over with"


	18. Hot and deadly

…

"Trying to go through the front door seems stupid. Maybe we could try a side entrance?"-Tali mumbled as the Mako charged forward towards the geth fortress. Therum was proving to be quite the unpleasant destination, with all the lava, bullets and toxic gasses involved. She found it to be amazing that the Protheans ever managed to create a colony there at all.

"Only a fool punches a nathak in the mouth. We should sneak around and pull its tail."-Wrex added, with an expression that seemed to be of nostalgic enjoyment. None of the crew besides him knew what in the world a nathak was, but if _Wrex_ had sneaked around it, it was probably serious business.

"Alright, let's take a right turn here then!"-Shepard yelled in a warning fashion. Everyone in the Mako knew what that meant: it was about to get bumpy. The tank jumped over a rock and was sent flying for a while as it went on at ramming speed. Surprisingly, a geth destroyer just so happened to be guarding the secondary path, and got completely squished when tons of metal came falling from the sky and onto his main processors. –"I meant to do that!"

Suddenly, a small rocket came from their left flank, making their shields flutter. Shep quickly turned the Mako towards the threat, and saw a geth turret preparing for another shot.

"Don't worry Commander, I've got this!"-Garrus yelled, spinning the main gun to attack. As he threw a large shell into the enemy, Ashley quickly scrambled to main the minigun and give the turret hell. Meanwhile, Kaiden and Tali where redirecting power towards the shields and upgrading defenses, while Wrex tried (successfully) to get Shepard to drive less like a drunk rhino, and more like an angry krogan on a tomkah.

Even as they were being gunned down by geth, Shepard managed to pull a smile at the situation. A team, _his_ team, working together, pulling through where everyone else failed. He was proud to be their Commander.

And then the geth battalion in front of them reminded him to get his head back in the game.

…

She struggled to break free many times, but to no avail. Her biotics had begun failing her a few days back, and they were the only thing that had kept her alive without food or water. Luckily, asari have a slow metabolism, so she knew she could hold out a bit longer. But what was the point?

She had come to realize that she was going to die, but she was at peace with her fate. Either she starved in that wretched world, or the geth and the krogan brute came back and freed her and then probably killed her after they'd gotten any information she might have. At least then, she could try and take as many robot bastards as she could.

In what she thought would be her last moments, she remembered her mother. Her sweet smile, her friendliness, her knowledge and passion. She regretted dearly not being able to say goodbye, but she knew that wherever Benezia was, she would see to it that Liara's death meant something.

She delved back into the silence, only hearing geth moving, constantly meddling with devices nearby, repairing machinery and trying to hack consoles. She was doomed.

Until suddenly, she heard a loud screeching sound, and a bang near her prison. She then proceeded to laugh at the fact that the geth, a super intelligent race, was dumb enough to use the elevator that she had quite clearly rigged with explosives.

…

"I TOLD YOU IT WAS A TRAP!"-Wrex yelled as the elevator fell down the shaft and neared the ground. Shepard set a protective biotic field bellow them, shielding them from the immense force of the fall. When the elevator crashed, they were all sent tumbling, dazed but unharmed.

"Next time, do it before we step into the trap!"- Ashely said, shaking off dust from her armor, coughing and holding her head to prevent the tingling in her ears from getting worse.

"Contacts!"-Shepard yelled, as he saw a geth sniper glinting in the distance. He had drained almost all his biotic energy with the field, but still managed to create a small barrier that protected the group from the shot.

It was all he needed to do. Wrex quickly went over the railings of the platform they had landed on, falling to the ground bellow with a loud thump and rushing the geth while screaming krogan profanities at them. Ash on the other hand stayed behind and laid down covering fire from her own sniper, taking out the long ranged geth units before they could arm the krogan. Shepard used an omnitool mod he'd borrowed from Tali and hacked a geth destroyer further in the back, turning it onto its allies. The rest was just a mess of bullets, medigel and krogan laughter.

"Hey Commander! Check this out!"- Wrex screamed from the lowest level, pointing at one of the platforms bellow Ashley and Shepard. They hurried down and met up with Wrex in front of a bright, blue energy field.

…

She could not believe her own eyes. A krogan, not the one that had come with the geth, had come falling down from above, killing geth and cackling maniacally as he did so. She also heard gunfire from above her as the geth across the cave fell, and was marveled at the perfect coordination of shots and biotics that quickly took down all of the mechanical foes. She then noticed that both the krogan and whoever was above where about to reconvene, and took the chance to let them know she was there. At least now she had a shot at getting out of there.

"Hello? Is anyone there? Hello! Please, help!"

…

He thought he heard someone scream for help, and so he hurried to the source. Right behind the blue field, an asari floated above the ground, encased inside an orb of light.

"Seems that we found our scientist. Doctor T'soni, I presume?"-Ashley said as she neared the Commander. She had always felt a natural friendliness for the asari, since they had woman-like traits and look a bit like humans. Even though, she felt like she couldn't trust this one, perhaps because she was Matriarch Benezias daughter, or perhaps because he could imagine the Commander and Alenko drooling over her body. She took an aggressive stance, but loosened up a bit when the Commander gave her a quick glance. She didn't like the influence the man had over her, but it was clear as daylight that if she had to let any male do that to her, it was going to be him.

"Yes, I am Dr. Liara T'soni. And may I request we postpone this discussion for after I leave this trap?"-she said, trying not to be ungrateful, but desperate to leave the prison that had encased her for so long.

"Don't worry doc, we'll get you out of there, I promise. Can you please tell us how you got stuck in there and how we can release you?"-Shepard asked. Liara quickly took notice that he must be the leader, and tried appealing to him so he could get her out of there. He seemed like a nice enough person, so it shouldn't be too hard.

"Yes, yes of course! In my excavations, I must have triggered some Prothean security system… Thousands of years old technology, working on a…"

"Mix of mass effect technology, element zero discharges and repelling ionic particles to keep the enemy out… fascinating."-she was outstandingly surprised as she heard the human interrupt her and correctly ascertaining the properties of the barrier that separated them. The krogan next to him, however, just sighed in dismay and boredom as he heard the technicalities and desperately looked at Shepard to beg him to stop.

"How… are you a Prothean expert too?"-she asked.

"No, just a proficient tech expert. The name is John Shepard, Alliance Commander and first human Spectre. So, I'm guessing this failsafe as some sort of power control terminal. Am I correct?"- Liara was surprised by his sudden outburst of information, but she nodded at him, and tried to point with her head at a small terminal behind them. He seemed to get the message.

"Alright, now all we need to do is getting over there. Any thoughts?"-when he saw that none of the team members responded, he turned back to the asari.

"Well, if I do recall correctly, the geth were fixing some mining equipment to try and take me… If you can find it, maybe it will be functional."-she nervously replied as he stared at her. She was grateful he was being kind, and was willing to get her out of there, but inwardly, she prepared all of her remaining biotic energy in case he became hostile.

Shepard turned away from the trapped asari and accompanied the rest of his squad to the lowest level of the cave.

"Finally, you two shut up. I was this close to shooting that barrier over and over again just so you could stop talking about it."-Wrex said as he made a pinching movement with his large fingers, and Shepard just shook his head left and right as he smiled.

"Shepard, how can we know that we can trust her? She might be in with the geth and Saren! We know her mother's his right hand!"-Ashley said as they neared a giant excavation drill.

"We don't, really. But human law states that she's innocent until proven contrary, and right now, she just looks like a trapped person who got a lot more than what she bargained for."-Ashley cringed a bit at his mention of human law. He was using her own words, her own philosophy, against her. She hated that he was right, but she loved the mans wits.

As they reached the mining gear, Shepard noticed a giant mining laser right next to what seemed to be a geth engineering unit and toolkit. Taking his time to examine it, he found that it was nearly completely repaired, with only a few key systems missing. Howevern some systems had been retrofitted with geth technology, which the Commander wasn't proficient with. Contacting the remainder of his team that he had left in the Mako earlier for help, he was surprised to see that they were in a fighting stance when Tali picked up the omnitool call.

"Shepard, we're a little busy, make it quick!"-she said as she ran a program to boost shields through her omnitool.

"Tali, we need help. The geth were repairing a mining laser but they used some of their technology. We need your help."

" _Bosh'tet_! Sorry, I'll help you out in a second. Lieutenant, get us somewhere safe!"-she yelled behind her shoulder, and soon the Mako started bumping.

"Do you need help out there? I can send someone…"-Shepard was not only preoccupied about the safety of his crew and the Mako, he was worried about her safety. He knew he couldn't let his feelings get in the way of the mission, but that was becoming progressively more difficult.

"No thanks, I think we're fine now. Let me have a look at that for a while."-she studied the schematics he sent her and looked at the machine through the omnitool.- Alright, look like you'll need a bit of omnigel, some conductor metal and a large enough discharge to get the particle accelerator running… Damnit, I should be there helping you."

"Hey, it's ok Tali. I needed you on the Mako. You're the only one I trust to keep that hunk of junk going. Besides, I'm pretty sure Garrus and Kaiden enjoy your company."

"What about me enjoying your company…"-she lowly mumbled, so low in fact that he couldn't be entirely sure he understood her.

"I'm sorry Tali, I didn't read that. Did you say something?"-he asked as he repaired the laser and pointed it at the wall bellow Liara's prison.

She seemed a bit flustered at her words, but calmly replied:

"Oh, no, nothing important. Just… please, be careful out there. Kaiden would kill me if you died in there without our help."-as she said this, Shepard finished the repairs and activated the instrument. It began heating up before firing.

"Don't worry Tali. I'll make sure we all get back safe to the Normandy. You guys be safe too now, ok? Shepard out."-he logged off his omnitool just as the laser fired. With one burst, the wall exploded violently and revealed an entirely new chamber behind it.

He signaled for the team to hurry behind him as he ran towards the hole, his weapon ready to fire. Ashley and Wrex ran close behind him, but the female human had started raising suspicions about the Commanders attitude. He seemed to act so… differently, whenever he spoke to the quarian girl. Was it a parental preoccupation? After all, she was clearly not yet considered an adult to her people. Or could it be that he was… no, Shepard couldn't possibly see anything in a woman with three fingers in each hand, her legs bent backwards and stuck inside a suit for the remainder of her life. She couldn't even picture a quarian loving another quarian. How could they, if they never even saw each others faces? Still, something about the situation set her off, and she decided to delve deeper into the matter later.

They reached a small space, which seemed like an elevator shaft. Shepard neared one of the terminals and interfaced with it, bringing a small platform from the depths of the hole and hovering there. They stepped onto it without a word, and stopped at the floor in which Liara T'soni was imprisoned.

"Shepard? Is that you?"-she said, with relief overflowing in her voice. He neared the terminal and turned to her.

"Don't worry, I've got this."-he pressed his omnitool and within seconds, the asari was free of her invisible chains. She fell to the ground harshly, and he approached her to help her up. She hugged him.

"Thank you so much! You actually rescued me! I… I don't know how to thank you enough…"-she whispered with tears in her eyes as she let go of him. She was clearly suffering from a lot of mental pressure from being inside the dome, but now that she was free, she could go back to normal.

"It's ok. That's what we do. Now come on, we need to get out of this ruins and back to our ship."

"Please, be careful! There's a krogan battlemaster with the geth!"-she said, remembering the crude laughter of the maniacal krogan after he'd described how he would torture her if she did not comply to his demands after she was free.

"Battlemaster? What can you tell me about that, Wrex?"-he turned to the krogan, expecting a reply, but the krogan was already one step ahead of him.

"How'd you know he was a battlemaster? Did he tell you about his clan?"-she seemed intimidated by his harshness, but Shepard was there to give her a reassuring look. She breathed in deeply and responded.

"No, but he talked a lot about his rank. Said that he was born a battlemaster. That he would lead the krogan into an age of glory, after the genophage was destroyed and the krogan rose again."

"Genophage destroyed, huh? Guess my suspicions checked out…"-Wrex said as he bit his finger, a troubled look in his face. Shepard decided to inquire him to learn more.

"Wait, you knew about this?"-the krogan looked at him and tried to find an appealing way to reply, but ultimately decided to just put it out bluntly.

"What else would drive these krogan to such lengths? Warriors such as them wouldn't accept credits to work with one of the galaxy's greatest threats or for a turian like Saren. No, krogan like them would need either an outstandingly big offer… which I guarantee, Saren could never come across with his Spectre status revoked… or something that would make their names appear in song for generations. If they believed that Saren had a cure for the genophage… they would fight to the very last breath."

"Then we've got to stop them before Saren deploys it. Otherwise, he'll have the whole krogan race behind him."-Ashley stepped in from the background, giving Wrex a quick glance before looking firmly at the Commander. Wrex then looked at her with the angriest, foulest gaze he could, before loudly returning:

"How can you say that? Have the krogan not yet suffered enough? We save every one of you little pyjaks and idiotic varen shits, and you thank us by neutering our entire race! And now, over a millennium after, you still refuse to give us a cure? I should kill all of you right now and join my people!"-Wrex went for his shotgun, and Ashley went for her machine gun, and Liara could only watch as they prepared to gun each other down. But at the last moment, Shepard stepped in and threw a biotic sphere from each his hands, which hit his companions weapons and launched them away, and onto the ground.

"ENOUGH! I've had it with you people! Ashley, do you think teasing Wrex will help anyone? That you'd act any different if the turians had done the same to humanity in the relay 314 incident? Grow up, missy!"-he scolded, a look of profound anger on his face. He'd put up with too much stress, too much shit for too long, and now he was venting it all. Then, he turned to Wrex. –"And YOU! How dare you threaten me and my crew! You don't think this is what Saren wants? All krogan behind him in some mad crusade? We don't even know if he has a cure! Stop thinking with your gun and start thinking with whatever vestige of a brain you have under that damn head plates!"

Liara looked at him, stunned by the man's words. He had just defused the situation with a bit of anger and logic. What kind of power did he have if he could persuade a trigger happy human and krogan to cooperate? She found the man profoundly interesting.

"We need to work together. We don't necessarily have to like each other, but I'd like us all to consider ourselves friends. And if I have to put one of you in a wheelchair to make us all get along all lovey dovey, I will do it in a heartbeat! Understood?"-he said, gaining both a small smile from the stunned krogan and the angry human. The asari laughed a bit too. It seemed as if even the human's terrible sense of humor had its wonders.

"Fine, Shepard. Have it your way. I'll help you stop the turian, but if you find a cure for the genophage, I'll need a lot more than just some idea of friendship to get me to come along."-he said as he picked up his rifle before heading back to Shepard. The Commander then stretched out his had, and signaled for the krogan to shake it. Reluctantly, the hulking figure accepted, and they shook hands, maybe not yet as friends, but at the very least as partners.

"Welcome back to the team, Wrex."

However, their moment of fraternization was soon over as the ruins began to shake and collapse around them. A large boulder fell right besides them, and Shepard and the others hurried to the console. Liara got there first, and got to work on the terminal that controlled the elevator.

"What's happening? Why are the ruins coming down?"-Ashley asked Liara, and the asari replied as she typed furiously and got the elevator up and running again.

"That mining laser must have tampered with the ruins support structures and activated the volcano they're in!"-Ashley looked awkwardly at the doctor, confusion well spread across her face.

"They built a base on a volcano? WHY?"

"Maybe they were cold, who cares? Let's just move already!"-Wrex yelled, and they all stepped onto the elevator to get out of the ruins.

Ashley still thought about her confrontation with Wrex just a few moments ago, and she decided to talk with Shepard to make amends.

"Shepard… I don't usually do this, but I want you to know… I'm sorry for the way I acted back there. You were right, I was rash, and stupid, and I'm sorry."-he looked at her with that small smile of his, and replied.

"While I do appreciate it Ash, I don't think it's me you need to apologize to. And I think someone else here also needs to apologize to a certain human female. Am I right or am I right, mister dinosaur?"

"Come on, Shepard, you want me to wear a dress too after this? Let's just focus on getting out of this alive, then we'll talk."-Wrex said, evading the Commanders jokingly disapproving glance. He heard Ashley laugh a bit from the side, before she said:

"Couldn't agree more, tough guy."-Liara spectated all of this, marveled by the cooperation between those three individuals. Only seconds ago, they were trying to murder each other, but now they talked as friends, or at the very least, close acquaintances. And all due to that one man, that one charismatic, human Commander…

Then, it hit her. All the time she had spent trapped, the lack of food, medical care, help, or hope, suddenly all rushed to her and she felt dizzy. She could only think of how terribly thirsty she was when she fell down, her last memory being of Shepard's face turning grim when he saw her fall and his arms catching her before she hit the ground.

"Liara! Stay with me! Stay… damnit, she's out. We need to get her to the Normandy, stat!"-he said to the rest of the crew, and they nodded in agreement.

As they reached the top floor, however, they saw another bright barrier blocking their way… only this time, a krogan and a bunch of geth went through it like thin air.

"Ash, get her to cover and then provide covering fire if things get messy. Fire only when I say so."-Shepard said as he looked back to his female companion, and knew he'd gotten through to her when she went to pick up the doctor. Then, the krogan battlemaster spoke.

"Surrender! Or maybe don't. That might actually be more fun."

"In case you didn't notice, this place is falling apart! We need to get out of here, now!"-Shepard yelled, seeing yet another block of stone fall besides them. The krogan laughed a bit before proceeding.

"I know! Exhilarating, isn't it?"-he took a few steps forwards and took out his pistol, and began to scan it while talking. –"By the way, I must thank you for getting rid of those energy fields for us. They were a pain on my little robotic buddies! Now… give me doctor and no one gets hurt. Well, except for her, of course."

"Sorry, but I think I'll keep her. She didn't seem to remember you too fondly, and I just happen to like rescuing damsels in distress."-Shepard calmly focused all his biotic energy and prepared to whip out his shotgun. Wrex seemed ready for battle too, and Shep knew Ashley had already taken cover and gotten ready to shoot the geth sniper that accompanied the krogan.

"Well, I guess I should thank you again then. I do like myself a bit of fun."- the krogan said as he pointed his pistol at Shepard.


	19. A Body Ablaze

…

What went wrong? Shepard couldn't help but wonder what had happened for events to transpire so terribly wrong. He looked down to his chest and saw only a boulder on top of it. It was heavy, and hurt him whenever he tried to breathe. Or maybe that was the smoke, the thick, black smoke that rose from the depths of the volcano and choked him into a near unconscious state. He couldn't feel his arms, but his legs were still sensitive, still fighting, trying to find a way, any way, to get him out of there. His vision became blurry, and desperation took over, an animal instinct driving him forward, knowing this was his end, but refusing to accept it.

As he felt his lungs and ribs being constricted and heard more and more chunks of rock and molten metal fall around him in the cave, he could not stop himself from veering off into a dream-like state, probably caused by the lack of oxygen and the deadliness of the gases around him, and one from which he did not expect to wake up. Feeling his last strengths abandoning him, he found himself returning to the beginning of the chain of events that had lead to his likely demise.

…

 _Earlier that day, Therum_

"ASH, NOW!"-Commander John Shepard yelled with all his might as he unleashed biotic havoc over the enemy troops. She quickly replied by executing a perfect shot, piercing the geth snipers armor in a single shot. Shepard then rolled not for cover, but forward, putting his pistol between his legs as he fired and rolled. The krogan did not expect this movement, and was hit by a substancial amount of bullets before charging back into action. He tried to shoot Shepard, but Wrex intervened, running up to his counterpart and blasting him with a shotgun burst.

The krogan battlemaster then entered a blood-rage, and rammed an angry Wrex, pining him to the ground and repeatedly punching and head-butting him. Shepard stopped mid roll and laid prone to attempt to shoot the enemy that threatened his teammate, but his shields were depleted by a shot from the geth sniper. Ashley, however, covered that problem for him, shooting the geth a second time and putting it down for good. With the impending threat gone, Shepard shot the krogan battlemaster with his own pistol, rage and desperation filling him with each hard trigger pull.

The enemy was stunned for a single second before he could recover from the shots, but that was long enough. Free from his foe's oppression, Wrex head-butted him with all his might, putting every bit of strength he had into one blow. The other krogan was sent back, dazed and grabbing his head with one hand, while trying to find his pistol with another.

But there were more pressing concerns. The remaining geth had mobilized and were now shooting at Shepard, and a shock trooper was keeping Ashley pinned behind cover with his rockets. Getting up and thanking Tali in his mind once more for the mod that she had lent him, Shepard used it to hack the shock trooper as he switched to his shotgun and laid waste to a nearby standard unit.

Sweat trickling down his face as he blasted away, he saw that Wrex and the other krogan were now fighting in hand to hand combat. Both men had knifes, both of them had the scars to prove they could use them. Wrex made a quick jab forward, but the other one avoided it and went for his eye. Wrex defended with his arm, and the blade dug into his flesh. One might see this as something bad, but Shepard recognized the look on his hulking companion's face: he had spotted an opportunity. Wrex made a curving motion with his unstuck hand, the one that had the knife, and thrust it deep into the space between the battlemasters plates and his head. His enemy seemed to guess what he was trying to do, and horrified by the prospect of getting his back plate removed or cut, he tried to release the knife from Wrex's arm to finish him off.

Only he couldn't. When he went to pull the knife, Wrex ran towards him, intentionally driving the enemy's blade further into his own flesh. He growled in pain, which must have meant that the blade had reached the area of effect of his second nervous system, but kept moving and acted like nothing had happened. Shocked by the outcome of their struggle, the enemy tried to drop the knife and fight Wrex with his own bare hands. But it was too late, as Wrex used the strength of his charge to twist his own blade in a vile, cruel way until a loud snap came from the other krogan. He shrieked in pain and horror, and blood started gushing out from the empty space behind his head. Wrex's blow had been so strong, it had popped the scales right out of the krogans head and made a dent in the armor. His psyche shattered by the sudden loss of what must have felt like an arm to him, the krogan fell to the ground, shaking violently and profusely. Wrex then took the knife, which had been dented, and straightened it out. Then, without hesitation, he pushed it into his foe's head, effectively stopping the sobbing and the cries for mercy.

There was no time to stand and watch, however. As Wrex fought the krogan, Ash's sniper overheated and she jumped into battle with her assault rifle, she moved between cover in the back of the room so she could be next to the asari doctor, who seemed to now be waking up from her unconscious state. Shepard, on the other hand, was having a bit of trouble handling the last two geth standard troopers left, as he sent a grenade flying of towards one of them and turned around to punch the other in the face. He brought out his omnitool and, in a burst of biotic energy and with as much rage as possible, mixed its own durability with a powerful punch to penetrate the geth's abdomen area and rip out its core. As he did this, he pressed a trigger that activated his grenade, and exploded the other drone, in an unmatched display of coordination and skill.

Ash looked at him amazed before focusing back onto the action. She went to shoot the last geth unit, a shock trooper, near the barrier that blocked their escape, but was interrupted when a large chunk of rock fell from the ceiling and onto the enemy, breaking the barrier in the process. The chamber shook violently, and Shepard and Wrex's heavy panting was interrupted by her utterly desperate shout:

"We have to get out of here, now! This place is falling apart!"

Now, massive boulders began to flood the room, tilting and denting the elevator whenever they fell. Ashley picked up doctor T'soni, who was just now regaining her consciousness, and explained to her now waking figure the basis of what was happening.

"Doctor, we need to run, now! This place is coming down, can you walk?"

"Mother…? Is… is that you?"- Liara said before drifting back into unconsciousness. Ashley cursed her misfortune, and considered leaving the scientist behind. But she remembered Shepard's words, and looking at the man who still tried to catch his breath from his earlier acrobatics, she couldn't drive herself to do it.

Not that she had to. Wrex came running in, like he usually does, and quickly talked.

"Give me the asari and let's get out of here, girly!"-Ashley picked up the asari and Wrex lifted the unconscious doctor with his arms and started running towards the entrance. Reaching Shepard, both Ashley and Wrex couldn't help but notice that he was glinting with biotic energy. The three of them ran, Wrex carrying the asari on his back now so he could run faster.

"Go,go,go!"-Shepard said as all hell broke loose. Lava started filling the small dig site, rocks fell everywhere, equipment and ruins burned up into smoke to suffocate the team. Whenever a boulder came to close to falling on their heads, Shepard averted the crisis by throwing a biotic pulse at it, sending it away and falling into the pit of lava that was beginning to form underneath them.

'Why did they build a base in a volcano?! Whyyyyyy?!'-Ashley thought as she ran and coughed, triping over small rocks but proceeding at a steady pace. Until a rock fell on her shoulder, too small for Shepard to notice, big enough to hurt her. She was behind everyone else, so they didn't notice at first, but she called out for help as she fell to the ground. Shepard quickly turned around and got her back on her feet, telling her not to give up. She was tired, out of breath and choking, but she was still alive.

"Mako, do you copy? We need an hot extraction, radio in the Normandy and get us out of here!"-Shepard yelled as he made sure she was ok before starting running again, still spending his strengths in throwing rocks away. They ran for a few more minutes, but it could have been hours for what the heat, the pressure and the impending sense of doom made it feel like.

As they neared the entrance, the atmosphere had become nigh unbearable. Only Wrex seemed not to be affected, his krogan physiology adapted to the harshness of nature by years of evolution on the irradiated wasteland of Tuchanka. They were close, so close they could already call it home free. But then another boulder fell, larger then the others, and blocked their path to freedom. On the other side, salvation, in this side, gruesome death. Shepard wasn't about to let some rock get in his way.

With all his biotic might, even though he was drained like a raisin, he lifted the giant boulder away as his team went through. He could see the Mako on the other side; 'My ride home.'-he thought.

But it all went wrong. The rocks around him fell, and as his team signaled for him to go through, the cave collapsed on top of him, making him loose all his focus, all his strength, and prepare to finally, once and for all, meet his maker.

"WHAT"- I hear you shout out in confusion and denial. –"Shepard can't die now! It's only the nineteenth chapter!"

Well, my friends, remember when I said I was going full canon? I lied. Besides, I like my story this way; a dramatic cliffhanger on an otherwise pretty linear story mission. I wrote this one fast, but I felt like I should ad some elements here; the drama, the fight, the run for their lives and a shocking finale to leave you guys craving for more.

Truth be told, this is my first story online ever. I have no idea if you'll like this or not. But I do like it. And I feel like a cliffhanger is just the way to finish this chapter.

See you next Thursday. Yup, that's right, Thursday. I'll be on vacation by then, and you can bet your sweet ass I'll be popping out more of these bad boys whenever I can. So see you then. Wouldn't miss it for the world.

PS: also, Star Wars is coming. Feel the force! I'll be watching it next Friday, so probably no chapter then. But who cares, STAR WARS!


	20. And a Heart in Flames

I was just messing with you guys, Shepard doesn't die. PLZ don't hurt me. And about the chapter that was due yesterday, turns out Star Wars was yesterday, so, yeah… sorry about that. Plus, I was a volunteer in a debate about violence in relationships. I know, it still doesn't make up for what I did, but please, try to understand.

Also, in completely unrelated but convenient news, I propose a shout out to pedrocoutinho2000, who's just started playing the Mass Effect trilogy inspired by yours truly, Porygonman. This one's on you, awesome random stranger!

…

He was flung back into consciousness by a gush of relatively fresh air and a loud, booming sound coming from beside him, as if a bomb had just detonated. He laid on his back and it hurt, hot metal burning against his flesh, his armor on the verge of catching fire. His vision was blurry, he was half dreaming and he had profound wounds, but Commander John Shepard was alive. The question was, for how long?

Consciousness. Such a frail thing. It can leave you or return to you at the most inconvenient of times. And with it, your whole inner self.

Memories flooded back to Shepard, panic filling his empty mind as he struggled to understand his surroundings. Rock, dust, smoke everywhere, death impendent. He tried to move, but still couldn't think straight, every idea hazy, every thought painful. Through sheer willpower, however, he overcame the pain momentarily to recollect his thoughts.

He knew that the lack of oxygen would drive him back into the state of unconsciousness, a morbid coma like state that was merely a step away from death, and acted as fast as he could. He lifted his arms… or he tried. He lacked the strength: the heat made him weak, the lack of air, water, and the strain he had been put too had been too much for him, and no amount of willpower could help him now. All those feelings, all those stories, of how good beats evil, the power of emotions, all worthless. Real life had no place for such lies. Only death remained now.

Yet, in what he realized were to be his final moments, Shepard was taken by one last impulse: curiosity. He could not figure out why breathing had suddenly become easier, why the air seemed lighter and where the loud sound from moments ago had originated.

He twisted his neck to understand why, slowly, painfully, methodically. He saw the rock that stranded him, the one that had fallen on his chest, still on top of him for the foreseeable future (and a short one, by the looks of it). But further along his line of sight, he spotted what seemed to be… light. Tainted by the dust, the blurriness and the ash, but yet there it was, brighter than the mine, brighter than his surroundings, a source of comforting light that came through a small, man sized opening. He wondered if this was going to be his end, if it was the prophetical light at the end of the tunnel. He struggled to get free of the rock, but to no avail. Then, something came through.

He wasn't sure what he was looking at. He saw a figure, humanoid in shape, heading towards him. It was… familiar. It was someone he knew. His heart beat faster, his eyes struggled to see who it was clearly. Finally, he recognized the person that came towards him, and the very thought of it drove the air from his lungs.

How was she here? She couldn't possibly have come to save him… could she?. He was buried in a cave, how could she have known? He called out, first moaning, then gaining strength and screaming a name he had thought lost through the echoes of time, firmly, desperately, clinging on to every last shard of hope, of desperation, of love he had in his weak body.

"Ria? Ria! RIA!"- he had trouble earing, which meant his ears were probably badly damaged. With his words came tears, of happiness, sadness and pain. What was… how was she there? Was she an… angel of some sort? Whatever was happening, she reacted. His screams seemed to produce an effect on the creature, her stance going from scared to… relief, perhaps?

She approached him, and he tried to talk, but to his dismay, no more words came out of his clogged throat and mouth as she stepped out of his line of sight for a while. He was then again lost, alone with his foolishness and the sensation of the grim reaper's approach. Had it all been just a mirage? Or would he die, and join those he had thought lost to him so long ago?

Then, with a vividness only those in their death beds can ever experience, he felt a tug at his feet, a force pushing the rock from his chest, a voice, _her_ voice, calling back, through the dust, through the heat, through death itself, and bringing him back.

"SHEPARD! SHEPARD! COME ON!"-she yelled at him in a way he would never want her too, her grief reaching his ears and bringing pain to his heart. No creature as pure as her should have to scream out like that, not because of him, not since he had failed her. But he still nurtured hope. And that was enough, somehow. Other people would have died long ago, but somehow, he knew he could pull through. That he must pull through. For her.

He felt an arm being put around him, lifting him up. He made contact with smooth, soft fabric and got back on his feet. They started walking then, his first steps weak, but determined. With her at his side, he could see anything through. He looked at her lower body, the only part of her that he could see as he hobbled forward, tenderness and a will to protect filing his insides.

"Ria… you're here…"-he weakly said, tired and hurt, but desperately struggling to live, to walk towards the light, moving a step at a time. Yet even then, he had a smile on his face. He was going to be with the ones he loved. He realized he had forgotten what her face was, and with enormous effort, looked up to be reminded of the one he would have given everything for, so very long ago. With a single touch to her side, she turned to face him, so he may look upon her and be reminded of happiness.

Yet, cruel joke of fate and gods, he couldn't see it. He was deprived of her face for all eternity, by a most unsettling, yet somehow still beautiful sight. In his advances, Shepard had little time to understand why the angel wore a mask, which only revealed a hint of a gorgeous, human expression and two bright, charming star-like eyes. In his debilitated state, he could have lost himself in them. But then she seemed to understand what had transpired, and rapidly put them both back on track, in the direction of the tainted, bright light.

He could not say for how long he had walked. He was tired, so tired. Breathing was nigh impossible, but he moved on. They finally set out towards infinity, crossing the edge between the hellish cave and whatever lay beyond. The light consumed him for a while, making him blind, but he didn't stop moving, guided and supported by his savior. Shortly after, he felt the tingling in his eyes and head stop, and he tried looking around to see what the afterlife was like. And the first thing Shepard saw, was a Mako.

"What… how?"-he asked quizzically, understanding were he was. Fiery planes surrounded him, not a living thing for miles and no trace of civilization but the one vehicle, strong, defiant. 'Therum'- the name came, filing his debilitated self, bringing up a number of illogical discrepancies between his mind and reality to light. It was, of course, far too much for a man in such a condition as John Shepard's. He begun to slip back into his state of unconsciousness. With a last glint of defiance, when again in such a short, or long, or infinite time, all seemed lost, the mask turned to him again.

"Commader! SHEPARD! We need you! Don't die, please! Don't do this to us! DON'T DO THIS TO ME!"-hurt filled her tone. He would have mistaken it for love, even, but he was not naïve to think that she could forgive him for a second after leaving her to die like that. She needed him now, however, and he answered in accordance, for he had been reminded of what had driven him this far.

Hope. That he may stop others' grief with his own. Hope, that never again, would he let something as wrong as the evil that threatened the galaxy prosper as it now did.

Hope to make amends. Hope for peace.

Hope for love.

With one final push, sweat, blood and tears marking their trail, they made it to the tank, and entered through the back, not before seeing a giant, metal structure fly down and hover over them, before landing in front of the Mako.

Accomplished, happy, euphoric and exhausted, he fell to the ground as he heard the machine begin to move, and muttered a few final words before he shut down.

"Not ever again… I love you…"-he said as he grabbed Ria's hand the way he used to before Elysium. He loved her so much right now, he couldn't possibly describe it. He stared into her eyes, losing himself in the white, the serene white of a star in the night sky, as he grabbed on to the three long fingers in a gloved hand that held him tightly in his slumber.

"I love you too…"-she silently whispered after she was sure that no one could ever hear her, her silent burden being diminished, just for one, brief eternity.

…

 _Another time, another place. Always here, always today. The human mind works in fascinating ways…_

"Life must go on. Such is the way of the galaxy. For every time something dies, something, elsewhere, is being reborn."

"Getting all philosophical on me Ria? We wouldn't want that now, would we? I mean, I'd have to scour the entire damn galaxy to find you again!"-Shepard said meekly as he patched her up. The wound in her side was big, and she knew it. Worst, he knew that she knew it. But his uneasy smile remained, attempting to comfort her in her time of need. She stared at him with all her heart, all her passion. She loved this man, and could not imagine leaving him behind to suffer. But she knew better than anyone that fate was cruel, ever since the batarian raid on Mindoir.

"Shepard…"

"You know you don't get to call me that. We have a deal Ria."-he said while applying the medi-gel. The pain from the knife striking her was gone, but she had lost some blood and was feeling faint. She looked back at him with tenderness, but kept herself composed and serious nonetheless.

"John, please. This is serious. You need to know…"

"Don't. Ria, please don't. You're ok, everything is going to be fine."-he said leaning by her side, taking her hand in his own, trembling with fear of what she had to say. She wanted to reassure him, to love him, but she knew what must be done, otherwise Shepard would carry guilt with him for the rest of his life if she died.

"I love you. I love you so much John. This is hard for me, but you have to know that whatever happens… I'm like you. Not a hero. Not special. Not your fault."

NOTYOURFAULTNOTYOURFAULTNOTYOURFAULTNOTYOURFAULT

The words echoed through the room and Shepard was thrown back and into space as he screamed in terror. Blood, blood everywhere, choking on it, drowning in it, help me, help ME!

Another time, another place. A name, always a name, always here, always today.

He loomed over Eden and then fell, like an angel that had lost his wings. When he reached the floor unharmed, and turned around to face death, he only looked down and saw a bloodied corpse torn with holes, filled with shrapnel, armor broken. The face was the only thing that remained now, after death had taken the rest.

"Jenkins?"

NOT YOUR FAULT

Another time, another place, always here, always today.

The scenery changed to space again, but this time he was on a ship. He was a child, so alone, so hopeless. So much energy, put to waste.

"Mom? When is he coming home?"-he called out to the figure besides him, and the shell of a woman answered.

"He's not coming sweetie. Because I screwed it all up. I'm so sorry.". She begun to cry, and he could not understand the turbulent emotions. How could love bring about so much pain? He just wished to hide, run, die in some corner. But he knew so did she. And decided to be brave.

"Mom…"

NOT YOUR FAULT

Another time, another place. Always away, always too late.

He was back. Back on Elysium. But the world was in flames. And not just reality. All his hopes, all his dreams, all his plans for the future. Now ashes in the wake of war. His hands were covered in them, ashes, so many of them burning his skin. Bones crushed, flesh burnt, and a single question filled the universe.

Why?

Her carcass lay there. Where was her beauty? Where was her smile?

Where was her face?

Death. So much death. The children's screams. The murder of innocents. Why? Why couldn't he stop it? Why had his hope failed him?

An answer came only when he neared her and clenched her hand. When he saw she still held the locket. He took it gently, remembering every moment he had spent with her. He opened it to see them both, shortly after graduation, kissing for one of the first times. He cried hard. He finally saw her face, and was reminded of what he had lost, what he had endured. But every man must move on. And the answer came at the same time as his rifle to his hands.

Maybe his hope had never failed him at all.

And a name echoed through the world once more, lonely, hurt, scared. Courageous, firm, defiant. Dead, alive, amazing.

Shepard.

Shepard.

"Shepard"-he heard as he woke up.


	21. Awakening

…

At first, there was nothing. One could not call it dark, for there was no dark. One may not call it light, for it didn't shine. It was a singularity, infinite, eternal. And then the world was born.

Shepard woke up to his name being pronounced, by whom, he could not ascertain. Confusion crippled his mind as the sudden return of his senses blinded and deafened him. But he was resolute, and sure of one thing. Someone was calling for him.

Slowly, steadily, he opened his eyes and turned them to the source of the voice. It had a feminine tone to it, an unmistakable fairness typical of a maiden. When he finally glimpsed what lay beyond the enclosure of his eyelids, he found himself marveled.

Two bright orbs loomed over him as twin suns, their silvery complexion surrounded by a purple aura, skimming in a sea of grey. The whole beauty of the void rested upon them, for now Shepard was reminded as to why space would always be his home, his final frontier.

Of course, romanticism cannot persist forever. Soon, he noticed that the orbs dwindle, not losing their strength, but taking up a new form, as if when he stared, they stared back. They started twisting in place, and even though they seemed uniformed, he knew that they scanned him with the same prowess, the same eagerness as he looked at them. And then, a call of relief filled the air.

"Keelah… you're alright."-a voice came from the purple of the void, and Shepard felt brought back to earth… so to speak. He now observed the stars differently, his other senses kicking in, his eyes probing beyond the void and resting upon her body, siting over a small chair, in what seemed to be the Normandy med-bay. Then he realized. They were not stars. They were her eyes. Then, he heard a sniff, perhaps of sadness, most likely of happiness. He saw as water, pure, clear, emerged from the silver and ran through her cheek. And in that moment, he knew he loved her.

He opened his mouth to speak, eager to say everything he could, lest he not be taken again by some perilous endeavor, but found that he couldn't. The air was stuck in his throat, his words trapped within his body by mortal constraints, and before he could force it out, she placed a single slick finger from her beautiful, alien hand on top of his lips, in a gentle, yet firm and serious manner.

"Don't speak yet. Your lungs were moderately injured from the ash and toxic fumes, but Doctor Chakwas took good care of you while you were out."-she stared through his eyes and into his soul. Then he knew. They were both scared, striving to live a life they did not fully understand. Or were these but the ramblings of a madman? Even though, only a blind man could avoid seeing her relief in his safety. -"You… keelah, you gave me quite a scare back there, I was… I…"

'I love you. Say it, Tali'Zorah, say it now before he slips away!'-the thought came through from the deepest reaches of her mind. Oh, how so desperately she craved to do so, to let him know her feelings, to be returned in her love, no matter how impossible it was. But she knew it to be unavoidable. She could never bring herself to say it, not now, after she knew the Commander, her faithful, honorable Commander, was so deeply in love with another woman as she was with him. And albeit grief tore her apart, Tali'Zorah stood the proudest and the bravest, for she did what many cannot: she was happy for them.

And that great courage was one of the things Shepard so fervently loved about her.

'What are you doing Shepard? You nearly died not long ago. You might never get another chance to say it. I love you. It's as simple as that.'-yet he was overcome, to his shame, by an all consuming fear. Not of rejection, but that he may die and leave her struck with even more grief than that which he had seen when he had woken up. If Tali knew his feelings, and wasn't driven away by them, and by whatever whim of chance, returned them, he would only be putting her in arms way if he died. And no matter if this was courage or cowardice, Shepard couldn't bring himself to see her suffer.

He gestured to her right arm, and she understood what he meant.

"Oh, right, an omnitool. You'll need it to speak, I'm sorry I… You must be tired. I'll just go outside and call the doctor."-she passed him the small chip and quickly left the room, no explanation, no reason for her to leave evident to him. Truth be told, she felt sick. Sick that she could have lost him. Sick that she couldn't look him in the eye and speak her mind. Sick that she had to be alone. For him.

She left behind a lone Shepard, stranded with his thoughts in a nightmare scenario he could never had foreseen.

'That's it. You blew it. Throwing a chance at happiness away for her. I can't say if hat's the smartest thing I've heard or the stupidest.'-he thought as he picked up the small chip and went to implant it on his clothes when he realized… he had no clothes. –'Oh, crap, did she see me like this? Is that why she left?! Shit. Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit.'

"Commander! I see Tali said the truth, you seem quite awake and recovered!"-Doctor Chakwas suddenly burst into the room, taking his mind off things and returning it to the current situation. He went to speak, but his throat burned his flesh and his words as he tried, and his lungs swelled as he coughed desperately, gasping for air whenever he could. Being a doctor, Karin Chakwas rushed to his side in his aid. –"Easy now, there you go, easy does it… You mustn't attempt to speak, your body is still not ready until I apply the final medication. But I'm guessing you already knew that, didn't you?"

Shepard nodded slowly and painfully, then glanced across the room and found his target. Pointing with his head, he directed her to his goal, and she soon understood. She got up, walked over to the other end of the room, picked it up, and threw him his favorite N7 shirt. Quickly, he put it on and slapped the omnitool into the fabric.

"Thanks."-he typed in, and the metallic voice of the omnitool came to life. The orange glow filled the room, and Chakwas was momentarily surprised. She turned to him and asked:

"An omnitool, heh? Clever way of bypassing your problem. Did Tali give it to you?"-she said, a cat-like curiosity filing her. She didn't need to be a doctor to see that the quarian had some sort of interest in the Commander, even though she could not quite point to what this interest amounted.

"Yes, she did. She was here to help me the second I woke up."-the metallic voice conveyed no emotion, but she understood how Shepard felt. He too was attracted by the quarian in a way she had not seen him like until then. But what were their feelings, were they the same, and did they both know? The questions ate away at Chakwas, who was thoroughly bored from filing out medical reports and tending to the unconscious Commander. She had to find solace and fun wherever she could.

"Poor girl. You should be ashamed of yourself, getting beaten up like that and then putting her in such a situation!"-Chakwas scowled at Shepard, who returned a look of confusion and surprise before continuing.

"What do you mean, doc?"

"I mean that, because of you, she's spent the whole week by your bedside waiting for a sign that you were even still alive!"

Shepard was taken back by this. Chakwas words hit him in the face like a truck. He just stood there in silence for a minute, shock and perplexity splattered across his face. He remembered his friend's relief at seeing him well, and an immense burden befell upon him. Eventually, he broke free of this astonished state and asked the good doctor:

"One… one week? I was gone for a week?"

"And you would have been gone for more if she hadn't acted as fast as she did! From the looks of it, you were trapped in that cave only for as long as she didn't take charge of that blasted tank we have in the lower deck. Heck, you might have died if not for her! I detected a high concentration of carbon monoxide and sulfur dioxide in the area around the Normandy. If she hadn't acted as fast, you'd have died… or worse, become brain dead for the rest of your life."

"The blast… the light…"

"All her doing, I presume. She shot the entrance of the cave, and since she was the only one with the pre-equipped suit, she went inside and hauled your marine ass out off there. You manage to inspire some loyalty Shepard, I tell you."

'She… she saved me. After all that… after even I'd given up hope… she came to my rescue… HA! I'm so stupid! Stupid to think that she ever needed my help! She has fire in her, no matter how well hidden it is. And I'm just some dumb fool in love with the wrong woman! She doesn't need you! STUPID!'

"Tali…"-he typed in his omnitool, melancholic, as fragile as the doctor had ever seen him. The girl, her actions and her words, seemed to have a great impact to Shepard, and the person in question must be of a great deal of importance to Shepard. He didn't seem to know what he was doing, lost and seeking guidance, so Chakwas brought up another topic to distract him from the cause of his sudden frailty.

"Well mister… you may also want to know that the rest of your crew made it here relatively unharmed."-she said, trying to break the ice and restart the conversation.

"The rest… ASH! WREX! LIARA! Where are they? Are they safe?"-even without emotion and with the delay from the typing, Shepard conveyed a great concern over his friends and squad mates with his words.

'Good, that's the Shepard I know.'-Chakwas thought, a small grin appearing on her face.

"Yes, yes, they are perfectly fine and ready to go. Wrex wasn't even injured and refused treatment before heading back to his dark corner downstars. Ashley as been worried sick about you, even if she tries not to show it. Girl thinks she's made of iron, but she as a soft core deep inside. She lit a few candles and dropped one or two prayers for you. Not that you or I believe in any of it, but still, I thought it was nice of her and it would be polite of me to mention it. As for Liara, she as been in custody in the adjacent room ever since she arrived on the ship, and she's been waiting for a chance to thank her dauntless hero for the daring rescue."-for a second, Shepard seemed to chuckle a bit, and even regained a bit of his usual, relaxed posture.

"You flatter me doc. You know I'll do anything for a damsel in distress."

"Oh? Is that so Commander? Because if so, you may want to explain to a certain young lady why you said "I love you" when you were dying from lack of oxygen."-intentionally, Chakwas had rubbed salt in the wound to get a reaction out of the Commander. She expected him to give her a sign of love, trust, great friendship for the quarian.

What she did not expect, however, was for Shepard to leap out of bed while screaming "WHAT?!" and start running after a certain quarian female without as much as a look back or a thought to his injuries.

"Yup, love. DEFINITELY love."-she whispered into the cold room, as she went to warn doctor T'soni that her savior had been awoken.


	22. Stronger than myself

…

"Hey, Shepard! Up and running again, uh?"-Alenko smirked as he neared the running Commander in the Normandy's middle deck. Shepard gave him only a quick glance before hurrying past him while shouting:

"Sorry Alenko! We'll talk later!"- a metallic voice came from an orange omnitool, somehow demonstrating that he was in a desperate hurry even though the lack of emotion in the words. Shepard flew by him quickly, and Kaiden could only wonder where Shepard had learned to type so fast.

And just like that, he was gone. Alenko scratched his head and cupped his chin in amusement and curiosity. What was the Commander up to? Whatever it was, it had something to do with the elevator, since he heard it being activated shortly after, the metallic sound of it descending being muffled by the engines and the now legendary elevator music, which the Commander had heard in the Citadel and had fallen in love with. With another smirk, Kaiden turned around and went back to whatever business he was up to before.

However, now, inside the elevator, Shepard was the living description of a nervous wreck. Now that he had time to stop and think due to the unnatural slowness of the elevator, he realized he had no idea whatsoever about what he was doing.

What was he thinking? He was just another normal man, your good old regular Joe, too scared and not reckless enough to show his true feelings but desperate to show Tali his appreciation and to make it clear who he thought he was talking to when he spoke the dreaded words "I love you.". Then it all sort of went to shit in his brain.

What was he going to say to her when he got to Engineering, if she even was in Engineering? What about the other people in the room, would he just pretend to ignore him, would they just pretend to ignore him? Should he be serious about it, or friendly? He wanted to be friendly, but he didn't want her to… Well, he did want her to know how he felt, but he didn't at the same time. How would he say that he didn't mean that he loved her, when he really did? All off this, and much more, did nothing but manage to frustrate him. Specially when he noticed that he would have to speak through the emotionless voice of a sixty year old man with bronchitis, which for some reason was the standard onnitool voice.

"Crap."-he ironically typed in unconsciously.

Facepalming himself as hard as he could without getting hurt, he gave up on being smart about the situation and decided to focus on the present and just go with the flow. However, in not trying to overthink things, he just thought about them even more, and he started freaking out, which was as alien to him as tits to a hanar. Why did this girl have this effect on him?! And why did he… strangely enjoy it? But of course, before he could begin overthinking things again, and right when it was most needed, there it was, the one thing that eased his mind. The music. Suddenly, uncontrollably, he found himself embroiled in one of his favorite hobbies. Humming.

"Dadadada-DA-dadadadada-dadadadaDAdada-Papapapapa-papapapapa-papapapapa!"-he cheerfully hummed as the elevator reached its destination. Why, he even tried to dance before understanding that maybe, just maybe, that would mean he would have taken it a bit too far. Reaching the bottom floor, he stepped outside to find Garrus and Wrex in an arm wrestling contest. Weird how aliens could be so outrageously different from humans in some aspects, but still share these small things even though they came from civilizations light years away from each other. Shepard made an effort not to look, but found himself staring for a while at the fierce competition before moving on.

Neither contestant said a word, they just stared at each other. Vigilant. Ready. Waiting for the time to strike. Shepard had expected it to be an easy win for the krogan, but something seemed off; he was either pulling his shots, or Wrex was having difficulty in claiming an advantage. Shepard would later learn, through the in-depth study of dextro physiology (never dare a drunk booze-hound, or crazy shit happens), that all dextros had surprisingly strong limbs. To put it in layman's terms, it was as if the turian's arm, by bending in such a strange fashion, became even stronger than a straight, human arm, enabling it to tank much more stress like, say, a seven hundred year old, one and a half ton krogan. This marvel of evolutionary success allowed for Garrus not only to make this a fair fight, but to try and force Wrex to make a run for his money. The clash would be titanic of course. Shepard sighed at the knowledge that he must go on and left the two to their struggle, vowing to learn the outcome when… and if, he was finished.

'You can do this, John. Focus. Foooccccuuuuus. There we go. Now put your game face on, get over to the girl, and somehow say that you appreciate what she's done for you with a stupid metallic voice, and that you somehow didn't mean to say "I love you!", but instead, you meant to say "I love you Ria!", even though you technically do love her, which is besides the point. Ready? No? Well fuck, because you're going in anyway!'- it was really disturbing that his consciousness still sounded like his mother's voice during all of this, but John had learned to just not care. Besides, there were bigger things at hand. One step at a time, breathing in and out and making that calm, charismatic look about him come out once more, he stepped into the room where she was with confidence and pride.

All of which he instantly lost when she looked at him.

"Oh! Shepard! I wasn't expecting you to get up so late. Did I…"

"NO!"-he screamed, getting a strange reaction from her. 'Damnit, pull it together, do it for her, you thresher maw puke!'. With renewed courage and calm, Shepard spoke once more. –" I mean… You didn't do anything wrong at all. That was what you were going to ask, wasn't it?"

She stared at him deeply, and he fell in love with her all over again. And again. Her skin, her suit, her eyes… she was gorgeous, right then and there, the blue aura of the mass effect drive making her just… stunning. He was breathless, speechless, and he felt all of his anxiety leave like if a gush of wind had just passed by and taken it with itself. Luckily for Shepard, she giggled in her characteristic way, which he adored so very much, and spoke with a kindness and purity that only someone like her could achieve. Such innocence, such generosity, such bravery and compassion. The Fleet had molded her into something wonderful, and no matter how much he cursed the wretched fate of the quarians for empathy and understanding of their desperate situation, he still thanked destiny for her.

"Hehe… how did you know?"-she asked with a smile present in her voice, uneasy, forced, but still a smile, and still partly genuine. She fidgeted her hands and he loved every second of it, remembering how soft they were to the touch, the feeling of his hands on hers, her three fingers the most precious thing he had touched. In that moment he would have reached out and kissed her, if only he could. The mask served as a reminder to him of how different they were, and of how they could never hope for a better future while…

'While what? While she doesn't confess her love for you? Get real man! While the war with the geth isn't over? While Saren threatens to destroy the galaxy? Or is it something different? What is it that you're so afraid? Is it… to tell her how you feel… while she's still bound to this place, bound to you? You think she should get a chance to go to her people, get accepted into them, and then propose leaving it all behind by telling her? Is that it, oh great Commander John Shepard? You're a pathetic excuse for a coward, and worst, you're hiding behind the best arguments for all the right reasons. You just don't even know it, coward. So stop pitying yourself and either tell her how you feel, be selfish for once in your fucking life, or do the horrible right thing and shut this business up for good! Because whatever you choose, it's your motivation from now on!'

"Tali…"-Shepard muttered, looking down to the floor, a gnawing feeling of emptiness bursting through his insides. This was it. The big moment. And he knew what must be done. Then, without warning, without any prelude, he smiled and made a thumbs up sign to her. –" It's what I would have said too!"-he said, making her smile alongside him once more.

They wanted to cry. To laugh. To love. But they couldn't. And so they spoke.

"Shepard I… you…"

"I came here to speak with you… about Therum… how you got me out."

She hurt with these words as she remembered his ramblings back in the ruins. Whoever had given him such determination, such willpower, such strength to go on, hadn't been her. Even though she had tried to help, it had seemed the other way around. She had first feared for Shepard's life, but looking into his eyes, seeing his will to live, his determination to overcome every single obstacle, to move on despite adversity, despite his wounds… she had found herself following him, even though he could barely stand, let alone walk without her help. Somehow… Shepard had found a reason to live so strong, he had fought death itself with it. And she had only been the catalyst to make this reason come up. His love for another.

"You did it. You managed to get out off there almost by yourself. You were… impressive."-she sounded distraught, sad, depressed.

In his heart, Shepard could feel his sadness swelling. All his worthlessness. All his sadness. All he'd been put to. He… he hadn't put his feelings out there and she… she was sad.

"No."-he said.

"What?"

"NO!"- Shepard said. He tightened his grip, on the situation, clenching his fist and fighting himself. No more whining! No more self pity! It was about time Shepard did what he had to do, and screw the consequences! A rush of determination filled him, and he spoke again, harder, stronger, this part off him better than the rest! All his drea,ms, all his goals, all his thoughts resonated as one, and he was going to do something that was long due!- "You were the one that made it all possible Tali! I know how you think, largely because I think the same way, and… Damn it, you better know something I've been meaning to say for a very long time! And it's that…You're great! You're more than great you're… amazing!"-Shepard now proudly smiled at her, while she clenched her hands in surprise and rejoicing with his words. "You're the one that makes me go on. I fought… I went on… I strived for the memory of a loved one, but… you managed to make me go on even beyond that. I can't live in the past forever and I can't let the thought of the future destroy who I am! This is what you and I need to know Tali. I need to put these darn feelings out there! I can't stand this anymore! You got me out of there, and no matter what you think… you're the reason I left that cave alive. Not Ria, not me… you. And I… I couldn't be more grateful. For giving me a chance to live, and for everything else! So please… Don't… don't be this way… I want you to be happy, I don't want us to be awkward to one another, I want us to be…"

"Friends?"-Tali asked, every fiber of her being telling her that he was right, but still needing an answer. Shepard didn't even hesitate. He took her hands and looked her in the eye.

"Forever. Whenever you need me. Let me know."

"Then how about a hug right about now?"


	23. Engineering Command

…

For a long time, they just stood there, talking. No implications, no hardships, no second intentions. Just talking. Shepard had thought it best to avoid mentioning anything too personal after his outburst and their emotional hug, but was forced to proceed when she pressed him about the incident on Therum, since he still hadn't explained why he'd said he loved her… Little did he know, not only had he gotten it all wrong due to Chakwas' tease, Tali felt exactly the same as him.

She was worried that he might accidentally make her reveal too much of her feelings for him, and being a klutz, she might ruin everything: their friendship, their camaraderie, and maybe… the possibility of something more? She blushed at the thought, but quickly pulled herself back together for him.

"So… when we were leaving the cave, you said something… peculiar…"

Tali's mind drifted back to the moment she had picked him up, while he called for someone else. She thought about the way she'd acted, and suddenly felt great shame by pressing him on such personal matters. 'Oh Keelah, what did I just say to him, that sounds so wrong! I'm delving way too much into this, I should probably just shut up, or make up an excuse, or…'

"I know."-he said with a resigned look, grabbing his arm and looking away from her, as if to avoid her gaze. He was unsure of how to go on, but decided that at the very least he owed her an explanation. No matter how weird and uncomfortable it would be. –"Doctor Chakwas… told me what I said while I was… down."

'He sounds so uncomfortable, why did you make him uncomfortable? What did you just do? Damn, think of something, act naturally!'-she thought as she scrambled to find an answer.

"Hum, we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I understand if it's too personal."

"No. I have to talk about this, make it clear what I meant."-he filled his lungs with air and prepared for one of the most awkward moments in his life. At the same time, Tali gained enough courage to step up and act like the brave woman she was.

"Shepard, you must know, I understand. You clearly meant every word you said, and far from me judging you for it. And I know what you meant, because… I've felt it too. Maybe not quite in the same way, but still…"-she stared at him when she noticed he was frozen in place, unable to move or talk. Then, she became intrigued and decided to ask what was going on. –"Shepard? Is everything alright?"

'Holy. Crap. This did not just happen. You… she… she feels the same way?! Oh crap. This is awesome! I can't believe it, you mean all this time… ALL THIS TIME?'- John Shepard thought, while inwardly having the time of his life. He couldn't believe his ears, finally, he'd discovered that Tali had felt the same way about him all along! –'Wait, let's just make sure that this isn't just some misunderstanding or anything!'

"Are you saying… what I think you're saying?"-Shepard asked Tali, and she just looked at him quizzically. Even though it pained her to do so, she explained:

"I don't know but… I mean… It's pretty obvious that whoever this… I mean, the person you love… loves you back."-she put it in terms he could never have misunderstood, right? So that must have meant that he wasn't just imagining it! Tali did love him! He was overjoyed, of course, but a sense of dread pended over him. He needed time to think to… assess the situation. Then, she finally brought the show to a close. –"Whoever Ria is… I'm sure you'll make her very happy. I'm just sorry that you confused me with her… I'm so sorry to have put you through that! Please, forgive me."

Shepard's heart just broke right then and there. Crushed by the weight of his ego, of his hopes of happiness. 'Too good to be true, ah, Shep? What did you think, that the quarian girl loved you? Dumbass. You should be grateful! You can finally move on, and you avoided the stupidest moment of your life by confessing to her!'

"Oh. Oh."-was all he could mutter as he took a step back in light of her revelation.

"Is everything alright? You look like you need to sit down."-she said, worried that his skin tone had changed, which she would later know was called "getting pale".

"Yes, yes, everything's fine, it's just that… Ria… that's a name I haven't heard in a long, long time…"

Tali stared at him confused. Had something happened between Shepard and this woman that had driven them apart? Secretly, and much to her dismay and embarrassment, she hoped so. She reprimanded herself mentally before deciding to see how far she could probe him without arising suspicion.

"I'm sorry if I made you relive something unpleasant. Isn't she your girlfriend? Or at least close?"

"You could say she was, but unfortunate circumstances drove us apart. Now, I barely remember her face."-Shepard answered, smiling grimly as he attempted to remember Elysium, only to see blurred memories of fire and blood and a general outline of his old lover's face.

"What could have driven you two apart? You obviously seem to care a lot for her."-Tali felt a sting of jealousy filling her attitude, and felt a sudden urge to jump towards the man in front of her, take her damn mask off and kiss him right then and there, but as any proud quarian, she shook it off to remind herself of what truly mattered: her duty towards the ship, and the Commander. She couldn't let her feelings get in the way of that, so she settled back to hoping that maybe, one day, she and Shepard might end up together.

The Commander hesitated a bit at the response, but told himself something that Captain Anderson had said a million times over when the Commander was still his XO: if you want your crew's trust, you either tell them the truth, or become a superbly skilled liar. Truth be told, neither Anderson nor Shepard were very good liars.

"Death did."-he finally said, leaving Tali in a state of shock as she drove her hand to where her mouth should be underneath the visor.

"Shepard, I am so sorry, I had no idea!"

"Hey, there's nothing to be sorry about. Besides, I thought I already told you back on the Citadel: you weren't there. There's literally nothing you could have done. Heck, you were a kid at the time, according to my people's standards!"

'And I still am according to mine…"-Tali thought, a sudden rush of realization coming over her. –'Is that how he thinks of me? A child? Maybe that's why he treats me so well all the time! I know I'm younger than him, but I still thought that…

No. Shepard thinks of me as an adult, I'm sure of it! He's always got my back, always been there during all of this. He wouldn't have taken my help if he didn't believe I could be of assistance. And he's helped me be recognized as a responsible adult with the Fleet's best interests in mind, maybe even retake the homeworld! With all of this… I can believe there is hope, even if the whole galaxy is against me… Sooner or later, I'll tell him how I feel.'

"You're right, Shepard. But I still feel a bit bad over bring that up."

"No pressure. My past as always been there to haunt me. You've just got to move forward, you know? Besides, Ria would have wanted me to be happy, so what's best forgotten should just stay that way."-Shepard looked at her with a smile that filled her with comfort. –"Besides, I think she would have liked the way I am now."

"I'm glad. I know what it is like to lose a loved one prematurely."-Tali said, remembering the malfunctioning air filter that had torn her family apart.

"Your mother, huh? Yeah, I understand what it's like to lose a parent at a young age."-Tali looked at him and instantly knew what he meant. The final piece of the puzzle was there.

"You lost your father before Elysium, didn't you?"-Shepard looked at her with a sad smile and huffed lightly.

"Was it that obvious?"-he asked looking her straight in the eye. She couldn't decide of she should smile, or cry, or if it even mattered because of her mask. –"Yes, I lost my father. To none other than the batarians. Made my family come apart for a while, before me and my mom got along again. It was… difficult for a kid. Specially when I said I wanted to join the Alliance, you should have seen the look on her face!"-Shepard's smile grew a bit, and Tali decided to share his happiness.

"I bet she was just worried about you. I'd be too, if I knew what kind of messes you'd get into!"-Shepard feigned insult and lifted a hand to his chest, dramatically (and ironically) replying to her comment:

"Are you saying you don't worry about me? Miss Zorah, how dare you?! I'll have you kicked out of the ship this instant!"-Tali chucled a bit and blushed, before coming up with her own witty response.

"Who'd take care of the ships engines then? Garrus can only calibrate things and Alenko spends all his time upstairs doing Ancestors know what."

"Again with the insults to my integrity? I could totally do your job twice as efficiently if I wasn't the Commander!"- Shepard said it sarcastically, but Tali looked at him and pondered over his words very carefully. On the one hand, the man was her Commander, and challenging him would be unprofessional, irresponsible, and highly unadvisable. On the other hand, however, Shepard was a close friend, and she was damn well not about to let go of this opportunity.

"Is that a challenge?"

Shepard looked at her for a while. 'Oh damn. Should I do it? It's really tempting… No, no! Just let her win! Back out, chicken, back out!'

"Deal."-he said, immediately regretting it and facepalming himself in his mind. Tali looked at him all too pleased. 'Keelah, didn't think that would work!'

"So, hum, who's going to take your place as Commander while you're down here?"-she asked, as if to lighten the serious, competitive mood that had crossed the room.

"How about our number one dextro aboard this ship?"-Shepard asked with a large grin on his face. He was scary, but somehow funny too. Whatever was going on between the two, they were certainly enjoying it far too much.

"You mean Garrus? Sure, he's a nice leader, but you think he could really… you were talking about me, weren't you?"- Shepard bit his upper lip and nodded in agreement. –"Please don't make me do this."

"Hey, there's gotta be a challenge on your end too, otherwise it's just no fun!"

"Can't I do anything else? Piloting a ship is a bit too much, don't you think?"-Tali enjoyed the playfulness of their conversation, but she was horrified by the idea of having to lead everyone in the crew of the most advanced ship in the galaxy.

"You wouldn't be piloting, Joker would."

"You get the point, _bosh'tet!_ How can I lead everyone all by myself?"

"Who said you'd be alone? There's an handsome, highly skilled and intelligent officer on this ship that just might be willing to help you."-he said, another malicious grin on his face. Tali decided that she should reply in accordance.

"Why would Alenko help me? Did you bribe him or something?"

"Cheeky! I like it. You'll make a great Commander, _without_ my help. How about that?"-Tali wanted to squeal in amusement, but remembered that she was no girl anymore, so instead, she looked at the Commander in defiance.

"Commander, you wouldn't leave a young damsel in distress, now would you?"-she winked behind her visor, and somehow, she just knew that Shepard had seen it. He clenched the spot on his chest directly over his chest and said:

"AH! My vow to help beautiful ladies under any circumstances! My one true weakness!"-Tali laughed a bit at this before realizing what he had just implied. She looked at him, blushing, and asked:

"You… think I'm beautiful. You little _bosh'tet."_

Usually, at this point, Shepard would back down and nervously cough and weasel his way out of the situation. However, this time, and remembering his earlier attitude, never to lie to her, he decided he had to give her some hint at what he felt.

"Completely stunning."-he added, a tenderness in his voice and eyes that made her love him even more. She just nervously laughed it off before being taken into the spirit and replying.

"Why, th-thank you… Well, if you must know, I only said that Alenko was the handsome officer to make fun of you…"-Shepard looked at her and asked:

"Is that supposed to imply something?"

"Well, yes… I think you're cute. For a human, at least."- she stuck her tongue out and winked again, and even though he could only see her eyes, he got the gist of it.

"Then you wouldn't mind appreciating me and my help from now on, for… let's say a week, ok?"

"Deal."-she said as she nodded vigorously.

"Well then, welcome to the job!"-he said, taking her hand and shaking it before getting down on one knee and giving her glove a gentle kiss. –"M'lady and Captain Tali'Zorah."


	24. Spacial Dialogues

…

"I swear to God I'm going to kill the Commander."-Ashley Williams said as she grabbed her meal from one of the specialized distribution machines on the Citadel's Zakera Ward. She sat down by Alenko and a group of other Alliance crewmembers, such as Engineer Adams, Doctor Chakwas and, oddly enough for a man that always stays inside the ship, Joker was there too.

"Aggressive, aren't we? What did the man do to you? Still hasn't figured out you've got a crush for him?"-Joker teased as he played around with the straw on his asari nutrition smoothie. He took a single sip from it and, disgusted, shoved it towards Kaiden while trying to rub the taste from his tongue.

"Shut up, you asshole, before I shut you up for good."-Ashley moaned somberly as she took a bite of her stereotypical steak and sipped on her asari drink. She'd tasted some asari and salarian foodstuffs, but had found that only their liquors appealed to her. Unfortunately, this also meant that she had to make sure that these beverages didn't completely eradicate her liver.

"Geez, feisty aren't we Ash? What's gotten into you?"-Alenko, who was to her left on the table, asked as he took a huge gulp from his beer, which, conveniently, had been the only thing he'd ordered. However, he'd fancied Jokers smoothie, and was now struggling between deciding to either drink the beer or the alien stuff. Such moral dilemmas are sure to plague one's life.

"Yes, miss Williams, do enlighten us. Such amounts of stress will surely be harmful towards your overall health, and I have no desire to treat you again after your last injuries on Therum."- Chakwas added. She was there purely to ensure that no one overdid their short stay on the Citadel by drinking themselves drunk or eating dextro food by accident. After all, it was the first time on the Citadel for many of the crewmembers, who had stayed aboard the ship for the whole duration of Shepard's meeting with the Council and, subsequently, his promotion to the ranks of the SPECTRES.

Ash sipped a from her glass and looked at Alenko with the most bummed out expression he could think off. Then, she spoke with a pissed off tone.

"Look, I get it that the guy is an amazing officer and soldier. Hell, I respect him for it more than anyone else!"

"Someone's got a crush…"-Joker said before she continued. She sent him a glare that could melt a glacier and he gulped loudly, put his hands up in defense and said: -"Sorry. Please, continue."

"Anyway, asshole, I was saying that even though I have the utmost respect and credibility for him, I just have a hard time picturing why he would do this."- Ash was clenching her stool has she spoke. Why was the man so damn hard to understand? Why couldn't she like a normal guy, like her sister Sarah did?

"Come on, you're just bummed out that he's hanging out with the alien crewmembers! Relax a bit, will'ya? What's so wrong about them anyway?"- Kaiden asked out of a mix of raw curiosity and wanting to save Joker's behind from becoming mush on the wall.

"What's wrong is that one of them is acting like she's our Captain! And worse, the Commander's supporting her behavior and staying by the Engineering deck doing _her_ job! I mean, seriously, I get that he wants them to feel at home and all, but it wasn't enough to just let them roam around the ship freely, now he gives aliens control of the ship?"-Ashley angrily said, getting up and putting both her hands on the table.

"Hey, you know he said it was temporary and that everyone in the ground team would have a shot at it for as long as he could carefully supervise them. Still, I wonder what this is all about. I'll admit, it's a bit strange, especially since she's also the youngest crewmember. Heh, it's probably to make her happy, since quarians can't really expect to do much with their lives in Citadel space, and maybe her dream is to be a captain one day. I dunno, what do you guys think?"- Alenko replied, ever the devils advocate.

"It's a dare."-suddenly, Engineer Adams, who'd been quiet for the whole conversation, spoke up. The others looked at him in surprise as he nibbled away at his burger.

"Wait, what do you mean? Are you joking, chief? Because usually, people leave that stuff up to me."-Joker said from his corner of the table, approaching a man he'd talked maybe twice in his life. Maybe Adams had a sense of humor and was just trying to pull everyone's leg.

"Nope. No joke, lieutenant. I heard every last bit of their conversation about a week ago."-Ashley quickly realized she had a golden opportunity to get some dirt on what the Commander talked about with the quarian girl whenever he headed down to Engineering. Maybe that could finally appease her jealousy.

"So, what did they talk about?"-she promptly asked him. Adams gave her a rather serious look before laughing a bit.

"None of your damn business, missy."-he replied, eating away at his hamburger yet again without a single care in the world. It seemed as if, much like Joker, Adams was only truly comfortable while inside the ship, doing is thing. Ashley, of course, didn't take too kindly to this response, and replied:

"Well, sir, it really wasn't _your_ business either, so just tell us!"-she proclaimed loudly, raising more than a few eyebrows, plates and tentacles all over the ward, which she rapidly noticed. She put her hands over her mouth as if to hide the shame, but remembered that there where only aliens around so she dropped her guard a bit. She didn't really care what members of other species thought of her, except maybe for the ones in the Normandy's crew, but certainly only for the sake of the mission, obviously. Definitely not because she actually wanted to get along with others. Yup. _Definitely (don't lie to yourselves)._

"Well, guess you have a point there, Williams…"-Adams said, reaching with his hand and scratching the back of his head.

"No. Nonononono. I won't let you, Adams!"-Doctor Chakwas' sudden outburst surprised everyone, but Ashley the most.

"Why not? Do you know something we don't, Doc?"-Ashley asked, confused and aggravated.

'Oh, you bet your gun I do, missy. And if Adams has half a brain cell between his ears, he'll know it two. And I say if those two have a thing going, let them do _their_ thing! Gods know they don't need a jealous third wheel messing up their relationship before it even begins. Luckily enough, the Commander seems genuinely oblivious to these women's feelings… Hah, idiot.'- Chakwas thought before giving Ash, and everyone who had partaken in the conversation up to that point, an answer.

"That's besides the point, Ashley. Engineer Adams did wrong in spying on a private conversation, and we should not indulge in the same mistake!"- she looked at Adams and conveyed her true message solely through eye contact. 'Tell them anything about those two love birds, and I'll personally poison your food next time.'

"Well, guess the good doctor's got a point there, kiddos. Not much I can argument against that."-Adams quickly added. As a senior officer, he wasn't afraid of many things, but the thought of having the ships doctor on your bad side would leave anyone anxious, or worse. He felt like he had lost his appetite and put his burger down. Before anyone else could say anything about it, he got up, picked up his tray, and left as fast as humanly possible, leaving behind a content Chakwas and an even more bummed out Ashley.

"What was that for, doc? Aren't you curious about what goes on down there every time he visits her?"-she asked. Chakwas hesitated a bit on the response, before elaborating.

"No, I don't. And if you're smart, you'll figure out why yourself."-having said that, Chakwas got up and left as well, leaving behind a bittersweet atmosphere that soon had made everyone pick their things up and leave. After all, this mystery would only be solved by one man, on one place.

Commander John Shepard had just won himself a mob of curious crewmembers.

…

"Damn, I did not expect _this_ of all things to blow up in my face."- Commander John Shepard said as he swiped the dirt off his head with a handkerchief. He was ducking underneath some exhaust ports and pipes, working on a few minor repairs to the heat sinks, since they showed slight, but worrying nonetheless malfunctions, probably due to all the use they'd been recently put too. Shepard turned to the other engineers and shouted: "HEY! Has anyone checked the heat dispersion charts since I left my post?"

"No, sir!"-a young engineer named Carlton Tucks answered as he hurried between checking the readings on mass effect radiations and energy pulses throughout the ships' core.

"Well then tell Monica to do it! I nearly had a pipe blow up on my face back there! And tell Jamin to check the power routings, I heard the core go at an unusually fast pace while I was down there!"-Shepard said, finally wiping off all the grease and dirt from his face and checking the updated status of the engines fuel consumption parameters. He was sweating like a pig and tired as all hell, but he had proven to be an extremely effective worker for the six days that he'd spent down by engineering. Now, he had only the slightest advantage over Tali, but planned on keeping it until the seven day period was over.

"Yes sir!"-the crewman meekly replied, certainly intimidated by Shepard's work method. Taking notice, the Commander promptly added:

"And Tucks?"

"Sir?"-a distraught voice came from where he was standing.

"Good job, keep it up!"-Shepard said with a smile.

"Thank you sir!"-the man proudly replied, and Shepard chuckled as he remembered when it was him that behaved like engineer Tucks. A young cadet, fresh into the Alliance, known only by a few hard ass officers who had met his mom back in the old days and who'd been given by her special indications to make his life hell to prepare him as much as they could. To this day, Shepard remembered how much he'd hated calculating programing subroutines for ship V.I.'s, but he still thanked mother for pushing him that far. After all, that was the only reason he was even able to compete with an intelligent, ambitious, pretty quarian named…

"Tali?"-Shepard asked as he felt a buzz on his omnitool, which told him that the message was originating from one of the CIC's consoles. Taping a button to respond, an image came up to reveal he closest thing to miss Zorah in the ship besides herself: Garrus Vakarian.

"Hey there, Shepard. I _can_ call you Shepard, right?"-the charismatic turian said as he apparently scrambled over something near the console.

"Yeah, sure, anytime… Is that a Mantis sniper rifle in the CIC?!"-Shepard loudly proclaimed as he understood what Garrus was fondling with.

"Hm? Oh, you mean this thing? Nothing to worry, Shepard! I've put the safety on. Just extending the barrel to make room for some new modifications, especially some that can improve the damage…"-Garrus said while giving Shep the turian version of a sadistic grin, which John just found funny since while I would look good to any other person, Shepard couldn't help but associate the expression with someone who was taking a shit. A _plated, hard as all hell_ kind of shit.

"Garrus, while I'm actually sort of curious to know just how you did that, you'll just have to promise me to show it later. I have a job to do, and a bet to win."-a small, disappointed sigh came from the other side of the screen, and Garrus continued.

"Yeah, I'd figured as much. Thanks again for letting me into it, by the way."

"No problem. I needed to reward you after defeating Wrex in an arm wrestling contest. Even if you cheated a bit."-Shepard chuckled at the memory, remembering just how pissed Wrex had been at first, but then calming down and saying that if he were in his bounty hunting days, he'd probably have done he same, and letting the matter go.

"Hey, I'm a legitimate arm wrestling champion! Not my fault we didn't play by the same rules. But anyway, we sort of need you on the CIC now."-Garrus said, the faintest bit of worry coming to his face.

"What's up? Something wrong?"-Shepard asked, getting up from the mess he was in and heading towards the exit to the room.

"Yeah, you could say that again. Tali says there's something here that should interest you."

"Well, what is it?"-Garrus now seemed a bit more worried, but still replied quickly.

"Admiral Hackett sent a message. There's trouble back on Sol."


	25. Onwards

Authors note: Hey there guys! It's me, Porygonman. And I have a few things I'd like to tell you. First of all, I feel like I should apologize for not making the deadline last sunday. I know it's no excuse, but I was really, and I mean _really_ tired. I spent the entire morning out of town, I couldn't write, I couldn't sleep, I was pretty much a mess. And I'm also stupidly lazy. So, I'm sorry.

Second of all, I'd like to ask you guys (someone will probably reply one day) what you think of my current upload schedule. Is it ok? Should I go faster? Or should I ease up a bit to make better content in a larger span of time? You guys choose and then let me know.

Finally, I'd like to know what you think of the series itself. I've gotten a few great reviews recently, which are always nice, specially because they give me a lot more insight into what I should be doing, and I thank everyone who's done that so far. So, on that note, is it ok to bring in these little episodes that don't break canon, or should I go for something more regular? Or something more exquisite? Again, it's all up to you.

Thanks for your patience, everyone. I promise I'll try my best to avoid missing deadlines from now on and take all of your feedback into consideration. Yours truly,

Porygonman.

…

"Good, you're here."-Garrus said as he put the datapad down and walked towards Shepard. The Commander had just entered the CIC and was looking mildly concerned, but he instantly kicked in his "badass-ready-for-anything-commander" mode.

"Give me a list of every crewmember that's out on the Citadel, give them a sitrep on the situation and have Joker plot a course to the Charon relay."-he said as he moved towards the galaxy map. When he got there, he activated the ships speakers and spoke to all the crew. –"Attention! All crewmembers are to report to their stations immediately and prepare for take off. We have an unscheduled department in about half an hour. We will be heading for the Sol system to investigate and contain a dangerous disturbance in an Alliance training facility back on Luna. This is not a drill, I repeat, this is _not_ a drill. I want those engines ready to go and a course plotted in ten minutes tops. Shepard out."-after finishing his small speech, he headed to the pilot's cabin. Garrus was already there giving Joker the mission details and helping him plot a course. Besides him was, beautiful as ever, Tali'Zorah nar Rayya.

"Shepard. I'm glad you're here. I think I'll need your help on this one."-she said as he approached them, expecting a normal, warm welcome from his end. However, she sensed something strange in the way he moved, in his stance. He stopped and looked at her from head to toe. She stared into his eyes and saw the same compassion that was usually there… but something else entirely too. There was a fiery passion in him, something fierce that loomed over him. She could read his determination, his anger, and his concerns through his body language, and she suddenly felt as if she was meeting a completely new side to him. The air around them seemed to get thicker all of the sudden. She hadn't seen him act like this ever, not even back on Feros.

"You've been doing great Tali, but I'm going to have to ask you to step down of the Commander shoes. _Now_. Let me handle this."-he stared her down with an intensity she could have never foreseen in him. It was as if he was about to fight her out of the blue. She could still see that he was clearly trying to keep his emotions in check and act as friendly as he could, but he appeared as someone ready to battle for something extremely precious to him. He did not seem to take this burden lightly at all.

"S-sure…"-she felt frankly intimidated by his sudden burst of motivation, but refrained from commenting while he was around. After speaking to her, Shepard nodded with a clearly fake smile and stepped out of the cabin to immediately broadcast orders throughout the ship yet again. His militaristic attitude and tone, the way he walked, the very look on his eyes as he picked up Garrus' Mantis rifle from one of the CIC terminals and immediately startd checking it and loading it, _all_ of this was new to her.

She stared over at Garrus and heard him gulp slightly. The turian had been unwittingly reminded of his training instructors back at the turian military. They'd strived for discipline through intimidation and appealing to one's sense of duty, but no matter how good they'd been, they had nothing on Shepard right now. The man had never treated any of the crew members wrong, but for a guy who's usually pretty laid back and likeable, he now had an aura around him capable of shattering a ship. He didn't just look intimidating. He was _pissed._ Which meant that during all the time they'd been fighting the geth, he'd kept his cool and hadn't given in to his inner anger.And that scared Garrus more than anything. Specially since the Commander was a biotic. Spirits knew he was strong enough in his passive mindset.

Then, she glanced at Joker, who'd been perfectly dumbfounded by these events. Yet, he still muttered:

"Oh crap… I'm sorry for whoever gets in his way today."

Tali felt his apprehension and went on to question him.

"Joker, what is it? Do you know what's up with Shepard?"-she promptly inquired while Shepard finished adjusting the weapon in the background. Joker cautiously glanced over at him as if to make sure it was safe to speak, and replied hesitantly:

"Well, you're probably better off asking Kaiden about this stuff, but… rumor around the Alliance has it that the Commander gets a bit touchy when it comes to threats to the human home system."

"Wait, there have been more than just this one?"-she asked him incredulously. Could it be that the humans had been attacked while Shepard was on service? She decided to ask. –"As there been any… incident involving aliens and the human home system?"

To her surprise, it was not Joker, but Garrus who replied.

"You quarians don't know much about the world out of the flotilla, do you now?"-he had a bit of an arrogant smirk on his face as he said it, Which lead to Tali instantly reaching towards the spot on her suit where her shotgun usually was, but on second thought his comment didn't seem malicious, so Tali decided to just lay off him this once. He seemed to notice it and pretended not to be bothered, but still he continued. –"Well, I guess there's no harm in educating you for once instead of lecturing you. Fine."

He couldn't see it, but Tali had formed a smirk of her own underneath the visor. Over the last few weeks, the turian who'd never particularly liked her had started to pick on her more intensively than ever before. She didn't really care, since she knew the truth. His words might be poisonous a few times, but his body language told her a lot. She was starting to grow on him. And awkwardly enough, the obnoxious, once ruthless, prideful turian had actually turned out to be a pretty nice guy under the idiotic exterior. Who knew, maybe they could actually get along one of these days.

Meanwhile, Garrus had stopped Joker from accusing him of, and I quote, "stealing his thunder from under his nose", getting only a faint "get that pole out of your ass" when Joker finally shut up. Then, he began talking.

"It was about thirty Galactic Standard Years ago. The turian military, alongside some minor Council inspectors, mostly turian or salarian, were sent to investigate a sudden spike in element zero radiation emissions from the Shanxi-Theta relay, and also from another one known as Relay 314 in Council space. They were sent first to the later, expecting to find a drive malfunction or a leak, since no race we knew about was going to start running around activating Mass Relays after the Rachni war incident.

They were wrong. The turian scouts found what appeared to be an expansion fleet, heavily militarized and attempting to reactivate an inactive Mass Relay. With no other choice, and in a desperate attempt to stop the unknown species from unleashing whatever lay beyond the Mass Relay, they were forced to exact swift justice and wipe out the alien force.

They would later know that a small patrol cruiser made it out before being destroyed. That is, they learned it seconds before they died to the human retaliation forces, who completely eliminated the superior turian force with an ingenious and unexpected surprise attack. But our ships were equipped with QEC while the humans still relied on inferior means of communication, which allowed us to enforce a counterattack. I'll spare you the details, but we ended up capturing one of their colonies, losing it, and just before we could start an all out war, the Council intervened and a peace treaty was signed. Which is the only reason there are still any humans in this galaxy. Although I must say, they're supposed to have put up quite a fight."-he finished.

This was a lot of info for Tali to take in. Things outside the flotilla were usually kept under strict supervision and were generally not even interesting to any quarian, but she had just assumed that an all out war between a Council race and a new species would have made its way to them. Again, she was frustrated about the shackles that held her people down, condemning them to an eternity of suffering in the void. She longed for the day she and all of her people could live like any other species in the whole dam galaxy: free to participate in galactic politics, to have a seat in an embassy on the Citadel, to claim a homeworld and walk around and breathe without those tight suits hindering them. To feel less like a trapped animal and more like a person.

"Are you telling me that's what's gotten him so worked up?"-she asked him, attempting to get her mind off of things and focusing solely on her Commanders state.

"What are you guys talking about?"-silently, Shepard had creeped up behind them, and was standing there with a glint of irritation and disapproval in his eyes, despite of his yet constant attempt to keep a calm and friendly appearance. Tali was out of breath for a while, and he looked at her as if he was about to pounce and kill someone. But suddenly, he just sighed disapprovingly and started heading back, much to the other three's relief. –"I'm known for going easy on you guys, which I'm not even sure should be something to be proud of, but you should really get back to work know. Things will get ugly soon enough and you'd better be ready. I need people I can count on ready for a fight."

"Yes sir!"-Garrus said while saluting in the traditional human way.

"You know he can't see you salute if his back's turned to you, right?"-Joker quickly and ironically asked, which would have probably earned him a punch from anyone else, but Garrus just looked at him with the expression of a serial killer. The message got through and Joker quickly apologized.

"Hey there, Garrus, pal, _amigo,_ no need to get pissed, it was just a joke! No hard feelings, right?"

"I swear upon the Spirits that one day I'll bring the joke down on you, Joker. You can write that down!"-he said as he stormed off, probably just to look cool.

"Geez, what's wrong with that prick? At least he' been getting a little better… a little."-Joker said while making faces at Garrus' back, which made Tali snicker.

"You realize he can't see you if his back's turned to you, right?"- she immediately said, not able to contain herself anymore. Joker looked flabbergasted and stared at her for a while before laughing it off.

"HAHAhaha! Talk about instant karma!"-he said, wiping tears from his face.

"Well, I'd better run. Since the Commander's taking over and this is the last day of our be… I mean, the last day of my captaining skills orientation… I should probably head down to engineering. See you later Joker."-sh said as she turned around and waved her hand.

"Hey, wait up. Does that mean I don't have to call you Captain Tali anymore? Because that was an experience I'd rather forget about."

"Yeah, sure."-she said as she headed out.

"Oh, and one more thing."-she heard from behind her, and got a little pissed off.

"What now, Joker? I'm busy!"

"Talk to Alenko about Shepard if you want the truth. Garrus just spouted out a bunch of nonsense about the war. I guarantee that has nothing to do with Shepard at all, but the details are classified so I don't know much. Talk to Kaiden, see what he can tell you."-Joker said with the most serious look she'd ever seen him with. She quickly felt a bit embarrassed by her attitude.

"Right. Sorry about that. Thanks a lot Joker!"

"Yeah, yeah, just don't forget to tell me afterwards! I've got a bet going with he armory guy over probable cause and I need that money, so go get 'em sister!"

Tali suddenly clenched her fist and stopped moving. Then, she started walking again, with only one thought flowing through her mind.

'Opportunistic asshole.'


	26. For Science!

…

"Heading back to Sol. Hmph. Maybe we'll get some vacation time after the mission. I'd like to see my mom and pa after we deal with that thing on Luna."-Kaiden Alenko said to Doctor Chakwas as she finished examining her scans of his L2 implant. It had been a nuisance for a long time, constantly giving him brutal headaches. Luckily, not only did it seem as if he was taking it pretty well, the doctor had good news for him.

They were both down in the Normandy's medbay, which had been their first stop after returning to the ship from the Citadel with the other crewmembers. Kaiden had had a breakdown and collapsed on the ground after a severe headache, so he went to the medbay with Chakwas to get treatment.

"Great news, Lieutenant. Seems as if your body is now finally adapting to the changes brought by the element zero."-she cheerfully said as she ran new data through her medical programs. Kaiden was left dumbfounded and surprised at this sudden revelation.

"Wait, you mean to tell me that my body as adapted _now_ of all times? What changed?"-for Kaiden, this was truly a big moment. His biotic powers had always come at a cost, sometimes rendering him defenseless on the face of unbearable pain, but now they might just finally begin to be less of a burden on his physical and mental health. Even though he didn't show it too much, Kaiden was utterly overjoyed.

An uneasy voice came from behind him.

"Perhaps I could explain."-Liara took a step forward and silently gestured him as if greeting him. Kaiden wouldn't admit it to anyone but Shepard, but he found the asari to be quite the piece of eye candy. Her suit fit her perfectly, she had beauty without having to try and a pale blue skin he found to be particularly appealing. Plus, she was a biotic.

However, that was besides the point at this moment, so Kaiden decided to just go back to his casual self. He figured he should probably probe her for more info, so he did.

"Hey, Liara. What did you mean by that?"

"Well, I gave her some non classified data regarding your medical condition and the human-element zero coalition after your latest breakdown earlier this week. She figured she could try and help, since she owes a debt of gratitude towards the crew for harboring her from Saren's goons, and most recently, she found something very interesting…"-Chakwas said before Liara could elaborate on her sentence, earning a small stare from the asari and an approving nod as she reached the part about her gratitude.

"It was the very least I could do after your bravery back on Therum. I heard your Commander nearly died trying to save me and your frien… I mean, alien companions, got very close to meeting their demise because I needed to be carried out. I am ashamed I was no help back then, and promptly offered to return your kindness when you fell ill."-she said a bit meekly, but with an uncertain conviction to her words. She was clearly a very different kind of person from whoever Kaiden had met before.

"Why, thank you, Dr. T'soni. Could you please say what you were able to find?"-Kaiden replied giving her and Chakwas a kind smile. Both women seemed t smile back and soon, Liara had pulled her omnitool up to project a chart representing the human anatomy in front of her. Chakwas then began to explain.

"As you most likely know, asari are well known throughout the galaxy for being natural biotics. Such is a power that has eluded humans thus far, which means biotics could only be found amongst those of our people who where preemptively exposed to element zero, be it in the womb, more rarely at a very young age, or through extensive gene therapy, as is the case with the majority of races in Citadel Space. With the aid of doctor T'soni, I was able to compare the specifics of asari physiology, which are remarkably… 'compatible'… to that of humans, and further analyze your specific case."

Liara stepped up when the projection changed to a detail analysis of an L2 implant's schematics and application procedures.

"As you know, the implants in your body, which are outstandingly similar to early prototypes used by the turian military in the early 'Cabal' programs, serve to channel and amplify your ability to create and manipulate mass effect fields to serve your desired purpose. By tampering with the way your body processes the presence of element zero, the Alliance was able to create a weaponized implant and ended up creating a new kind of troops: human biotics. But the original implants were flawed, even more so then your own, so the project was scrapped in detriment of your current implant, the L2."-she said as she prepared a new image.

"Wait a second, doctor, I have an unrelated question. How come you have access to turian military records of early biotic implants?"-Kaiden asked out of sheer curiosity, which prompted Liara to respond.

"My people have always historically had a proficiency in biotic and mass effect energy manipulation. It was only logical that when a new, powerful species such as the turians entered Council Space for the first time, we would share our knowledge on the matter, specially given the context of their timely arrival."

"The Rachni Wars…"-Kaiden gently muttered as he grabbed his chin. Liara looked at him decisively and nodded.

"Precisely. I am glad you know the story. What you may not know, is that turian biotics were, and still are, ridiculously rare, outstandingly so. Out of every reported case of exposure to element zero, only a fraction of 0.01% report signs of potential biotic ability. Early salarian scientists theorized it was a side effect of their dextro protein build, but we know understand the problem to be far more deeply rooted in their genetics. But I digress. What you need to know is that all of this happened many centuries ago, and all records of this era were made public long ago after the turians joined the Council. Even though the Hierarchy protested, those of the Council found it to be wise to provide free access to these documents to new species, so they too might adapt the technology to their own people. And though many have tried, only a few, such as the volus and the batarians, have ever managed to fabricate physiologically compatible models. The quarians were on the verge of completion when the Morning War began, and since then no further research has been made… at least, none that we are aware of. I hope I have answered your question."

"Yes, thank you very much Doctor. One last detail though."-his thankful expression suddenly turned a bit more gloomier. –"Why was this technology never shared with the humans? And how come we developed biotic implants so fast?"-Kaiden asked in a mix of confusion… and anger at already knowing the most likely answer.

"Well…"-Liara hesitated as she searched for words that would not sound offensive. –"Not to be rude to you, Lieutenant, but… humanity has come across the galaxy as some sort of bully."

"What do you mean?"-Kaiden asked with an air of surprise on his face.

"Do not act so naïve, Kaiden. You know perfectly well what the doctor means."-Chakwas said as she smacked him on the head with a gentle punch. She looked at him with an air of superiority, like a teacher trying to get a stubborn child to learn something after explaining it many times over. –"After the battle of Shanxi, the whole galaxy as feared the humans. We gained a fierce reputation of being thick headed bullies with a knack for violence and disorder. Further studies of our culture and history only served to boost the other species' resolve that we are nothing but new bullies who are pampered by the Council do to how military and expansive prowess. All species, except for the krogan, who'd never had to use implants, refused to hand over the schemes. There was also not a single chance the turians would have handed over the information they had taken decades to obtain and given it to their newest, least trusted ally. And like I previously said, the rest of the species simply did not wish to improve human power in the galaxy, fearing it may grow too big and smother their own. The most adamant species to have something to say about it just so happened to be the batarians, which greatly increased animosity between their Hierarchy and our Parliament."

Liara eagerly stepped in to fill in the rest of the details.

"As for why humans were able to master biotic energy manipulation on such a short time, it's clear that not only your species as an affinity towards it, your biology is surprisingly volatile. Many salarian scientists have hypothesized great breakthroughs in modern medicine would be possible through the extensive study of human biology, but the Alliance has always intervened and prevented any bodies or civilians from being relinquished to any extraterrestrial organization or group, which as not abided well for your reputation either."

A moment of silence loomed over the room, a chilling sensation of uneasiness coursing through the three of them. They had never given much thought about it, tried avoiding the topic as much they could, but the truth was right there in front of them: allof humanity was shrouded and partaking in an immense charade, an overwhelming amount of prejudice and fear rendering even the easiest of cooperation between races into an near unavoidable impossibility. Only with the Councils intervention could the humans ever manage to strike a deal with the turians and create the ship they all flew on right now. Like it or not, it seemed the lack of comprehension between species posed a great hindrance to their full cooperative potential.

"Well then… you could cut the tension here with a knife."-Chakwas said, not in the least intimidated by etiquette or the inherent awkwardness of the situation. Aiden took the opportunity to pry for more details on his own problem, which was what had begun this conversation in the first place.

"Liara, if it is that I may call you so?"

"Yes, you may. Please, speak your mind."

"I feel as if you have both forgotten a very important detail in your ramblings."-he said, now determined to get answers.

"Oh? And what might that be?"-Chakwas asked, her motherly appearance imposing over Alenko's rashness. However, he was not dissuaded and proceeded to investigate further.

"You are still to explain why my headaches are going to disappear."

Chakwas and Liara looked surprised by his conviction. They looked at him in suspense, then exchanged a glance between themselves, and finally, Chakwas turned to her patient and said to him:

"My dear… who gave you that ridiculous idea?"


	27. Like Shooting Stars!

…

"Alright everyone, welcome to the Sol system, thank you for flying on Joker/Normandy airlines, we hope you've enjoyed the trip and we wish to see you again soon!"-Joker said as he exited the vicinities of the Charon Relay and quickly passed besides Pluto, which had stabilized and stopped its orbit around the Sun ever since the mass relay had first been discovered and activated. He got a few loud grunts of displeasure from the crew, who were a bit tired of his shenanigans, and a powerfully disapproving look from an angry Shepard, but asides from that, everything went his way just as usual. At least, until they neared Luna base.

It all started with a sudden lack of response from the heat sink data collection devices. He could have shaken it off as a minor technical difficulty and tried to reboot the system manually, but something on the back of his mind seemed to try and warn him. He checked the ship logs just to be safe, and there it was, clear as the sky: the heat sinks had been checked and cleared for deployment just before the transmission from Admiral Hackett had come in earlier that day. Again, it might just have been a technical malfunction, or even crew incompetence or lack of attention, but he still had a gut feeling that something was off.

"Hey, Commander! Could you come over here for a minute?"-he shouted towards the room behind him. He heard the man's footsteps as they approached his location.

"What is it Joker, I'm busy. If this is some sort of weird joke I'll have you on janitor duty for the next week."-the Commander suddenly lashed out.

'Geez, what's wrong with him? He's been acting weird since we were told Earth was in trouble.'-Joker thought before the Commander sighed lightly and seemed to ease up a bit.

"Look, I'm sorry about my attitude but I'm really busy. Could you tell me what's up?"-he said, now much more calm than before, or at least appearing to be.

"Yeah, sure. I'd like to check out some of the information in the logs with your own. Did you perhaps, by any chance at all, fiddle with the heat sinks earlier today?"-Joker asked as he tried to search for other systems that might be malfunctioning.

"Yes, the disperser system had a slight malfunction, but we easily corrected it. Why is that?"-Shepard asked, antsy to get back to his post but now intrigued by Joker's seriousness.

"So, there's no way they'd be malfunctioning again, right?"-Joker expectantly asked as his scan finished. No systems besides that one seemed to be affected, but still…

Shepard looked at him, thinking up of some explanation to give him.

"Scooch aside a little bit while I check something out."-he said to Joker as he neared to console in front of them. He ran a program through his omnitool to check his previous logs of the repairs and compared them to the ones on the console. It didn't make any sense, they should be working perfectly fine.

"See anything?"-Joker impatiently asked, feeling that his personal space was clearly being violated by the fact that the Commander of the ship was smothering him to get to the console up front.

"None of this makes sense, I personally checked every system. I'll bring Tali up on hologram."-he put in some commands into the machine on his arm and an image of a quarian female suddenly popped out from thin air.

"Shepard, what is it that you need?"-she asked, eager to help. She was covered in grease from being down by the Engineering deck making improvements to the systems Shepard had been repairing over the course of that week, and though it did make her a bit disgusting, she was kind of cute and glittery too.

"Tali, can you please check the heat sinks and get a readout on their condition?"

"Sure, give me a minute…"-she said as she messed around with her omnitool. After a while, she turned back to Shepard and said:

"Everything seems to be in order, but I'm detecting a small bug in the data system. Is that what you're looking into?"-she asked him.

"Yes, that's exactly it! Can you tell me what's up with my beauty?"-Joker jumped in front of the image captor to get Tali to answer him, which slightly startled both her and Shepard. Tali's stance then changed to what they'd learned to be a confused look on a quarian, and she asked:

"Your… beauty?"-she seemed a bit ashamed to delve in the matter, but Shepard quickly and impatiently intervened.

"He means the ship, he's got a weird sense of romance."

'You're one to talk.'-Joker thought promptly, but he must have been to evident about it in the expression he made, because Shepard seemed to notice and gave him a raging glance that shut his mind up instantly.

"So anyway, can you pinpoint the source since you're down there?"-Jeff rapidly said to ward of attention from himself. Shepard gave him a look that pretty much shouted "We'll talk about this later" and turned back to Tali.

"I believe I already have. It seems that at least another internal system is malfunctioning as well, which is interfering with the data collectors from getting any readouts. It must be from the recent upgraded connections we had installed for faster ship response. They're different from any other on the ship."-the quarian uneasily said, understanding the implications of her words.

"Are you saying there's another system that's not working properly right now, before an important mission?!"-Shepard said. Stunned by the revelation. He knew this was extremely bad news. To his appeasement, Joker stepped in and counter-argued:

"That's impossible! I've just ran the detection program, no other system in the entire ship is malfunctioning!"-Joker shouted over the comm link.

"Well, if no other program is defective…"-Shepard said staring down at the console worryingly.

"That must mean…"

They all realized what was going on at exactly the same time, and panic flowed through them instantaneously.

"THAT THE DETECTION SYSTEM IS MALFUNCTIONING!"-they all said. Shepard promptly started heading to the back of the CIC while keeping the connection to Tali and opening an new one to Joker's console.

"Joker, quick, find any way to assess the threat and find out what the heck is going on! Tali, quick, I need you to…"

"WARNING! WARNING! Foreign agent activity detected! Attempted entry in ships firewall spotted! WARNING! WARNING! Recommend immediate shutdown of all non essential systems and forms of external communications!"-the ships V.I. voice roared through the speakers, getting a shocked reaction from all of the crewmembers. Some even got up from their posts in surprise before Shepard ordered them:

"Everyone, do what the V.I. said! Shut it all down!"-he worried over to the galaxy map and saw his suspicions confirmed. The course was being jammed, and his fear had come true: they were on an nigh unavoidable collision course with Earth's moon. –"Tali, shut everything down! Joker, the course we set is a bust, you have to fly this thing manually! Get to it mister, we ain't dying today!"-his emotion was suddenly replaced with surgical planning and cunning, and he soon found himself manually shutting down systems left and right as he attempted to brace the crew for impact.

"How did that damn thing even gain access to the Normandy's innermost systems? I thought Hackett had told us it ran on a closed network, so it couldn't be shut down from a distance!"-Joker yelled over the communicator as he pulled up heavily in a desperate attempt to avoid colliding with the hard rock ground of the moon.

"It must have used the machinery in the base to create a transmitter so it could leave the base unhindered!"-Shepard yelled back as he turned the lighting system off, which left them in complete, pitch black darkness for a moment before the emergency lights came back on.

"You mean, it was just waiting for some passerby to fly near it so it could transmit itself into their ship? That's crazy! No V.I. could expect to accomplish that!"-Tali told them as she frantically fought the corrupt data with her own code to try and stop its spread into the vital systems of the ship, such as life support and oxygen production.

"You're right. This is no V.I."-Shepard hadn't been sure, but he'd harbored suspicions about the project ever since Hackett had told him about the way it at massacred the men in the base and gained control of all other forms of machinery inside in a mere day of rebellion. Now, he was certain about the true nature of the threat they faced. –"This thing as too much intelligence and thought capacity to be a normal Earth made V.I.. I fear we have to deal with the first ever human created A.I."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"-Tali shouted over the communicator, busting one of Joker's eardrums in the process. She was clearly taking this matter rather personally. –"Your people went along and created an A.I.? Don't they have any idea of how dangerously stupid and naïve that his? That think could wind up killing us all!"

"That's why we're going to stop it! We'll discuss the politics of the situation later, right now we have to prevent it from taking us down!"-Shepard yelled once more. The A.I. must have understood they were fighting it for control of the ship, because moments after Shepard took out one of the last tainted systems, the ship started gaining even more speed. –"Joker, what the hell was that?!"

"It's no use Commander! It has taken control of the engines! We're going down!"-Joker said as he frantically, desperately tried to bring the ship to a stop. Sweat poured down his face as he attempted to save not only his life, but the one's of every person inside of the ship as well. –"Come on baby, pull up, PULL UP DAMNIT!"

Shepard turned to the cockpit and saw the land near them, closer and closer, moving towards them at too fast a pace for the ship to handle. Joker had put the ship on an almost horizontal descent, but they were going three times as fast as they ever should in any sort of emergency landing. One small mistake would mean their inevitable doom at the hands of the machine entity that was intent on bringing them all down. Seeing this, Shepard broadcast to all channels in the vicinity and hacked into the ship speakers:

"All hands! Brace for immediate impact! BRACE FOR IMP-"


	28. Stranded in the void

Hello everyone. My apologies about yesterday, but I fear I have bad news. My computer is broke. Yup, you heard it, broke. Apparently, the joints between the visor and the lower part of my laptop were busted due to stress and now it needs new parts directly from the producer. I'll be borrowing a friend's machintosh while I wait, so no worries about the chapters, but you might just end up finding grammar errors or letters out of place because the symbols in the keypad are all messed up when compared to a normal pc. Also, this thing only had the 2010 version of Word, and I use the 2007, so I had to get my friend to install it for me (part of the reason why I was only able to start writing at one A.M.), and there's a thunderstorm outside, and if it wasn't bad enough, this mac's battery doesn't work right, which means it ha to be plugged on all the time. Remember. Thunderstorm outside.

So anyway, sorry about that.

Once more, thank you for all your support and critics, you guys are the best!

…

Blood. It had come rushing into his mouth as he crashed to the ground, smashing his lower lip into his teeth and opening the flesh to reveal a gush of red, nauseating liquid. He felt his head was spinning. Dizzy from the fall, he tried to get up and managed to do so after only a few tries.

He looked around him and saw that the CIC was intact, which meant the fall couldn't have been too hard. Which meant the crew where probably safe. He hoped.

"Shepard!"- a familiar, distressed voice came from the haziness, a voice on which he focused on to regain control of his body. He had no difficulty whatsoever recognizing the voice. Regaining his stability and collecting his thoughts, Shepard replied:

"Yeah, I'm ok Joker. You in the pilot's seat still?"-Shepard said as he stumbled a bit while heading towards his friend, then moving at a more regular, steady pace and finally arriving near the pilot. He was clearly in pain when the Commander reached him, but his face lightened up as he saw his commanding officer get close. He was clenching his inner leg, right underneath the knee, and Shepard realized that blood was dripping from it.

"Thank goodness, you're alright…"-the pilot gleefully

"Joker, you're bleeding. We need to get you to Chakwas fast."- Shepard said, worrying for his friend. He knew about Joker's condition, and feared what would happen if a shattered bone was left untreated for too long, nevermind the fact that Joker was the only person on the ship who was trained to actually fly the Normandy. Without them, they'd be trapped on the Moon for all eternity, or until a ship arrived. In the latter case, the hostile A.I. would just steal the other ship and do with it as it saw fit. Either way, they lost, and most likely died. But Joker took priority right now, so Shepard went to pick him up and help him walk.

"Hey, hey, easy there! It's fine, everything's fine! I have leg braces, remember? The impact may have caused a few minor fractures, but the bone's still intact and this is just a flesh wound! Relax!"-Joker said, making Shepard hesitate before hauling him up anyway. –"Hey, did you not hear what I just said?!"

Shepard looked at him with the same kind of look a father gives to a whining child who refuses to see reason.

"I couldn't care less. For all I know, you're not only injured, but also the only goddamn person that can get us all out off this rock. You're getting medical attention now, even if I have to carry your ass down there myself."-Joker looked in his eye with a mix of defiance and understanding, and finally made a "tsk" sound with his tongue and tried to get up. After a bit, he got his arm around Shepard's shoulders and they both started heading to the medbay. In an attempt to lighten the mood, Joker started talking.

"You know, even though communication is down, life support isn't. I checked the console, and there's a big concentration of life signs in the emergency pods and some others scattered around the medbay, the cargo bay and lower Engineering. The others probably made it all out alive."-he said with his happy grin stamped on his face, but with an unusual, hesitant air to it.. He was clearly still very shaken by the experience, and thinking about the good possibilities was keeping him up. Shepard knew that either he tried to comfort Joker, or he'd find the pilot to be afflicted with guilt if anything happened to a fellow crewmember. He'd done that song and dance far too many times not to be familiar with it.

"Let's just focus on making it down there, flight lieutenant. One step at a time."-they both neared the galaxy map, and Shepard thought of a way too keep Joker entertained. He'd need to get his mind off of things when they went down the stairs, since it was sure to be a painful experience. –"How did you manage to pull the ship up so fast? I thought we were goners, but you managed to get us down safely."

"Yeah yeah, I'd say it was easy, but then you'd probably call me out on it later on. So no, it wasn't easy, it freaking hurt a lot, but thanks to my pristine piloting skills, a light knowledge of gravitational forces and dumb luck, neither you, nor me, are dead."-Shepard noticed his hesitation at speaking about neither of them being dead, so he decided to give him another morality boost.

"Well, us, and the rest of the crew. If you said there were life signs in the medbay, that means that Chakwas should probably already be taking care of the injured crewmembers. They'll be fine. Besides, you can finally say you're as good a pilot as you always boast to be!"- both of them laughed a bit at what he said, and they finally reached the stairs. Joker understood what that meant and looked at them with a bit of dread.

"This is going to hurt, isn't it?"-he asked, looking at Shepard seeking words of comfort, but inwardly, he already knew the answer. John knew that he knew, so he decided to just be straight forward about it.

"Probably a lot. All I can do is help distract you and say it won't last long. Does your leg hurt that much?"- Shepard asked and Joker instinctively grabbed his wound to hide it.

"It burns like hell, but like I said, it's just a flesh wound. Probably. Let's just go through with this, ok?"-Shepard smirked a bit before replying.

"Sure, let's go."

They took the first few steps. Joker's leg was filled with a sudden, intense peak of pain, rising all the way down from the bottom to his thigh. He stumbled a bit on his feet, but Shepard was there to prevent him from falling.

"Thanks, Commander. That was unpleasant."

"Don't mention it. Let's just get you to the doctor."-Joker nodded at hearing Shepard speak and moved on slower than before, fearful of another jolt of pain, but gaining more and more confidence with each step. Soon enough, they got to the lower deck, right next to the elevator.

"HEY! Anyone out there?"-Joker shouted as he gently pushed Shepard away to stand against a wall. He seemed to be bearing the pain well enough to walk on his own now. –"Doctor Chakwas? Doc? Anyone? Karin, are you there?"- Shepard was surprised that Joker knew Chakwas' first name, which she mentioned only on extremely rare occasions. Then again, it did make sense. They must have been well acquainted, if the good doctor had to treat him for Vroliks whenever a problem appeared. In hindsight, it even made sense for Joker to want to become a spaceship pilot: with only the need for small movements and no outstanding physical demands, the job was practically tailored for him.

"Any crewmembers in the vicinity, please respond! …"- Shepard and Joker waited for an answer for a while, but they heard nothing. Shepard then tugged at Joker's shoulder and spoke. –"Come on Joker, if they're not responding, that means at least one of us has to go check it out. You're badly hurt, so just stay here while I go see in what condition the medbay is."-Joker instantly raised his finger and shook his head from side to side.

"Sorry, Commander, but that's not happening. If anyone else is ok, I'll want to see it with my own two eyes. I owe Karin that much."- Shepard thought about dissuading him, but looked at Joker's decided expression and realized he was determined to seeing this through. Sighing, he replied:

"Ok, I respect and understand what you mean, so I'll let you have it your way. But this is a one time thing. Don't disobey direct orders without a damn good reason again. Ok Joker?"- the pilot then sarcastically smirked and saluted his commanding officer.

"Sir, yes sir."

…

 _Elsewhere, undisclosed location, unknown time_

The smoke reached his nostrils and he instantly huffed it away with satisfaction. He loved the way the cigar felt on his hand and the pleasure of inhaling and exhaling the substance that composed it. But today was special.

He'd brought up a special brand, old Earth made, twenty first century cigar pack to celebrate the occasion. The package said "Marlboro" and it felt divine. Everything about it felt right. The textures, the warnings on the package, the cigar itself, it's size, scent and smoke all aligning to what was a truly memorable experience.

He sent a ring of smoke flying towards the ceiling and saw it move up steadily, dispersing gradually and leaving before his eyes only the sight of the large blue and red star in front of him. Could there be anything more human? This truly was a relic from the past, a relic from when humanity stood alone and was self sufficient, without alien races meddling into its affairs.

He took another cigar from the pack as he finished his current one and lit it up with his omnitool. At least the aliens had supplied humans with some useful tech… for a while. Then, they'd begun fearing that humanity would take its rightful place as the dominant species of the galaxy and started capping off our advantages.

But this newest discovery could change everything. He turned on the communicator that was by his side. Detecting the sudden motion, the panel he had had installed so many years ago lit up to reveal the enormous, truly vast array of operations he overlooked: the exploration of secrets, infiltration into alien communities, and finally, scientific research and advancement. He'd had troubling news about a man taking Cerberus' programs out from within, and soon discovered it to be a certain recently promoted Commander. A shame the Council had gotten to him before they did, as the man's record stated that he would have been a most valuable asset to the cause. But now that his loyalties were with the aliens, it would be troublesome to convince him of their righteousness. Truly, a waste of potential.

However, Shepard was not one to disappoint. When trying to hack into his ships' systems, their engineers and tech experts had had great difficulties. It seemed as if their network was covered in protective measures far beyond anything they'd ever seen. It had taken them three entire weeks to discover links with a security program inside the standard quarian suit, which lead him to believe that the quarian they'd previously been informed about, this Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, had more too her than met the eye.

The same went for the rest of Shepard's unorthodox crew: a turian, specially selected to enter Spectre training. He was amongst a thousand candidates, but what set him apart was that he was chosen as the prime candidate. The only problem some instructors saw was his attitude, but most ruled it off and passed him with excellence. Dropped out due to his father's demands. A potential exploit right there, if ever needed. He took another smoke.

The krogan mercenary. There was already a file on him, due to a prior involvement with him and an STG spy. He'd been hired by their association to eliminate the spy without ever knowing who it was he was truly working for. A skilled biotic, heir to a krogan tribe, exiled from his home. A true berserker and an expert with a shotgun. If need be, they could probably buy him off with enough credits and a few other eccentricities he might have.

The asari. A new find for the Commander, this one was hard to get a read on. Someone, either her, her mother, or her absent "father", had hidden her past behind a wall of security clearances, fake files and political chitter chatter. No matter. They'd get to her eventually.

The Alliance crewmembers where all already covered due to their well placed spies within the Alliance networks, but a few stood out: a certain Ashley Williams and Kaiden Alenko. He soon learned that they too were a part of Shepard's ground team. He was not surprised: the Commander clearly had a knack for spotting talent. He also figured they'd be ferociously loyal to the Alliance and Shepard, Kaiden due to his friendship with the man, and Ashley due to her family name, which she would try to redeem until the bitter end. He eagerly bit his lip when he read the rest and found a week spot. Alas, they too had exploits: loving families who were either fragile or numerous. Ripe for the picking, child's play, even.

All that they needed now was Shepard. Appealing to his sense of duty was out of the table, since the man knew and made it clear where his allegiances lied. His family was dead, safe from his mother, who was too well guarded for any conventional assassin. Besides, killing a ship captain would bring along a lot of heat now that Kahoku had been killed at the hands of that stupid cell which had started to experiment with rachni and thorian creepers. Disgusting. It revolted him to know he'd employed such incompetent nincompoops. At least they'd been dealt with by Shepard, and their intel said that the Alliance believed Cerberus to be destroyed.

What they needed was a way into the Normandy's computers. A vulnerability in the system, a small crack from which they could watch from the shadows, waiting, prowling.

Such an opportunity arose when a strange signal emitted from Luna, the Earth's moon. And with it, not only opened countless possibilities, but a new goal as well.

Obtaining all they could for themselves.


	29. The fall

…

There was a weird, uneasy silence looming over the ship. The thought of the encompassing, smothering void that surrounded them made them shiver for a bit as they drew near their goal. Slowly, methodically, Joker and Shepard made their way to the medbay. Joker groaned in pain a bit from time to time, but managed to stop when they reached the door. Shepard set Joker down to use his omnitool and manually open the door, since the entire operating system was down.

When it opened, he found a gun pointed to his face, point blank range. His instincts kicked in and he raised his hand almost immediatly to hit the other person's forearm, using immense force and speed to send the gun flying away towards the corner of the room. Before the hostile figure had time to respond or even think, Shepard had already tackled it to the ground and grabbed them by the arms, preventing them from struggling free. He looked at their face to se who it was that attacked him.

It was Dr. Chakwas.

"Get away from me, you filthy machine scum! I'll have you know we'll fight to the very end!"-she yelled in desperation and defiance, fighting to set herself free from the clutches of Shepard. His response was to hold her even more tightly and try to get her to recognize him.

"Doctor! Doctor, it's me! Just me and Joker! Shepard and Joker! Calm down!"-Chakwas tried struggling for a bit longer, but she'd understood that it was a losing fight and didn't try as hard as before. She eventually stopped altogether and stared at Shepard in the face.

"Is it truly you, Commander? Or is it just some sort of more advanced prototype the Alliance had in store like the other freaks?"-Chakwas asked, knowing that al her hopes depended on his answer. Shepard was as confused as he could be right then and there, but managed to regain his focus and respond when he saw Joker enter the room with a surprised look stamped all over his face.

"Yes. Yes, it's me, Chakwas. What happened to you? Where are the others?"-Shepard asked as he looked around the room. Joker said he'd detected life signs in the medbay, so where was everyone?

"Karin? Shepard, what are you doing, get off of her! Karin, are you alright?"-Joker said as he neared her.

"Jeff…? Is that you? How are you still here after all that happened?"-she said as she saw him approach, stumbling more than usual. As a doctor, it took her only a few seconds to figure out what had happened to him. –"Oh my, you're hurt Jeff! What happened to your leg?!"

Shepard figured this would be a good time to let her go, so he released Chakwas from his grasp. The woman immediately gave him a look that had "thank you" written all over it and sat up t near Joker. He kneeled next to her, which gave him a sudden and intense jolt of pain, but when he saw Chakwas' worried expression, he just smiled and shrugged it off.

"Hey, it's no big deal. Probably just a flesh wound."-he said to try and make her fell better. Chakwas was still very stunned at the sight of the two of them, and seemed to ward away the shock by focusing on Joker's wound.

"Jeff, this is probably very serious. You might have snapped a bone, or even worst! Lay down over that table, fast! You shouldn't have put stress over that, god damn it! Why didn't you apply a makeshift gauze, or try to stank the bleeding?"-she looked awfully worried and a bit angry as she helped Joker get up and set him down over the operating table. Shepard got up too and helped get Joker there, deciding to resign to helping his friend before trying to find answers to whatever was going on at the moment.

"I couldn't. The braces, remember? Can't put them on or take them off by myself. Besides, I figured they could stank it well enough."

"Those things aren't going to perform miracles, you know!"-Chakwas was regaining her usual composure, more so that now she even seemed genuinely mad at Joker, a pretty clear indicator that things were returning to normal.

"I guess you could say I thought I was "braced" for impact! Hah? Haaah?"-he said as he looked at the two other people present in the room making a pointing gesture. –"Did you get it? Because I'm wearing braces? Geez, where's your sense of humor?"

"Can I punch him already?"-Shepard asked Chakwas, making her laugh a bit before looking back at Jeff with a serious expression.

"Believe me, if he wasn't fragile as brittle, I'd have done that ages ago. But I'm afraid he'll just have to endure through one of my lectures again when I'm done operating."- Chakwas said as she stepped away from the table to open up a drawer and remove its contents: two masks and a two pairs of gloves. Joker loudly gulped and started sweating when he saw Chakwas open another drawer and pick up a new set of tools, these ones with spikier, sharper ends.

"Hey, operating me now? With the power down? You're joking, right dock? Right?"-Joker said, uneasily staring at the nearing objects meant for cutting open flesh.

"I don't joke when I'm about to work, Mr. Moreau. Your injuries are severe, and I need to patch them up as quickly as possible, before permanent damage is done."-she said as she put one of the masks and a pair of gloves on. She threw the remaining ones at Shepard. –"Here, you'll need these. I'm requisitioning your help, Commander."-Shepard nodded and promptly began to put the equipment on.

"Sure thing, doctor. Just give the instructions."

"Hey, are you guys insane? Why not just throw in a bit of medigel to ease the pain and stop the bleeding and get this over with as fast as we can?"-Joker asked as he inwardly shrieked as Chakwas prepared an enormous syringe with a strange liquid.

"Joker, think back to your military training, even I know this one. Your bone is snapped, probably shattered throughout your flesh and muscle. We need to get those pieces out before we can patch you up with medigel. Remember, medigel only works to hold things together and to alleviate the pain of an injury…"-Shepard said, demonstrating his basic knowledge of first aid and medicinal treatments he'd delved into during training.

"Sounds just about what I need right now! A painkiller and something to hold my leg together."

"Jeff, stop being such a baby! If you took your meds like you were supposed to then maybe your bone would have been resilient enough to endure the impact!"-Chakwas spouted as she tapped his arm, first gently, then harder, trying to find a vein in which she could inject the analgesic so she could perform the operation in a more humanitarian way.

"Hey, I take my meds! … Just usually at the wrong times and with a few days of delay…"-Chakwas instantly brought her hand to her face and gave Shepard a look. 'Can you believe this guy?', it said. Shepard just grinned and shrugged back, not sure of what to say. He seemed to lose all form of authority near the middle aged woman, her stance and unmistakable and unavoidable glance making it clear that though he was in control of the ship, the medbay was her domain.

"Joker, you should probably just shut up. It would make this much easier on all of us."-he finally managed to say, earning him a reply along the lines of:

"Hey, whose side are you on?"

"The one with the pointy, sharp objects made specifically for the task of ripping through your skin and muscles. So if you know what's best for you, just let us take care of you and try not to overthink it, ok? It's for your own good."-Jeff gave him a resigned grunt but seemed to acknowledge the logic in his argument. Satisfied, Shepard gave him a small, comforting grin, which lead to Jeff blurting out one final, decisive argument.

"Well, what about the other crewmembers? They could be more injured than I am! We have to help them!"-he blurted out in a mixed attempt to find out what had happened to his colleagues, and desperation to avoid getting his leg pried open. Of course, he'd not given the words much thought, as with most things he said, and took a while to understand that Chakwas had started to walk back slowly and shake uncontrollably. Her eyes seemed to go blank and she started to breath heavily. Her mind drifted somewhere else, and she felt dizzy and confused and scared and alone, so alone, and cold…

"Doctor? Doctor, are you alright?"-Shepard asked her as he put an arm around her back to make sure she didn't fall on accident and hurt herself. She was clearly shaken by whatever had happened to her, but what could have happened, really? They'd hit the floor only about ten minutes ago from what he figured, how could have everyone gone missing in such a short time? And why was Chakwas still there? He felt like there was a lot more to the situation than met the eye.

Suddenly, the doctor stopped shaking and seemed to regain her composure once more. Then, after a few deep breaths, she managed to find the will to speak again.

"I'm sorry. I lost it there for a second. I just wasn't… expecting you to ask this of me. I thought you were… no, that wouldn't have made any sense, Jeff had to have been piloting the ship. I'm not thinking straight, apologies."-she seemed lost for a second, before turning back to more pressing matters, such as Jeff's leg. But Shepard wasn't through just yet. He wanted some answers.

"What wouldn't have made sense? What did you think had happened to us?"-Chakwas shook a bit and stared around the room, trying to avoid Shepard's gaze. She eventually ended up looking at the ground with her arms crossed, a clear indication she wasn't comfortable talking about it.

"The same that happened to the others. I thought you'd have been there in the cargo bay when… when they…"

"When what, Karin? What happened?"-Joker said from the table, eager to know what had happened to comfort his friend. Chakwas dropped a few tears before responding. They fell on her arms and splashed on the ground.

"I thought you were taken by the machines. Just like everyone else."


	30. The Heroes That NEVER Give Up

_Authors Note: Sorry for not uploading last week everyone, but truth be told, I was just really, really tired. I hadn't been sleeping well, I had to work on a new computer, I stayed up late to study for exams and quite frankly, I just wanted to take some time off to enjoy myself too. I've been keeping a few vacation spots in consideration so I can lie down for a while and get myself back in business, you know, so I'm psyched up for the job again. But thanks to a very unique person I was fortunate to become acquainted with, I've come to realize that I can't just run away from my problems and my responsibilities, no matter how tired I may be feeling. Especially since I've been failing you guys. But that ends here. I vowed to never give up on this story and I'll be damned if I go back on that promise. So get ready for my comeback, because I'm not stopping. Sure, I may have my ups and downs, but I'll keep this show on the road for as long as humanly possible, and then some! So again, thank you guys for your kindness, and get ready for a new chapter!_

…

"Quiet! I think I heard some movement nearby!"-Chief Engineer Adams faintly but firmly whispered to the other crewmembers hiding in a small shaft in the lower deck of the Normandy, dedicated exclusively to Engineering activities. They'd been there for quite a while, still pretty shaken from the fall against Luna and the ensuing scenario. Saying that the situation looked grim would have been an understatement. Terror had spread through their hearts during the last hours, their doubts and fears crawling their way to their very resolve to survive.

It had all started quite a few hours ago, when they were still recovering from the crash, fearful and panicking, with all systems shutting themselves down and no way to contact the other crewmembers on the upper floors. However, they were all Alliance soldiers, prepared for the worst and combat ready. Soon after the crash, Adams had taken command of all those around him and started on getting a few systems back online, such as the door controls, which would otherwise need to be manually opened from the outside. For a second there, everything seemed fine, with no one finding a particular reason to worry about their situation other than just having fallen into the moon.

That's when the loud screams had begun. They were ensued by a loud sound of metal clinging and resonating throughout the ship. They heard mortified yells and cursing, shooting and the roar of weaponry coming from the upper decks and the nearby cargo bay. The sounds of weapons fire and the possibility of their comrades and themselves dying intimidated some of the youngest engineers to the point that some of them threw up on the floor right then and there. Luckily, they had a veteran, Adams, to make them put themselves together and reprioritize objectives. Just as the screams began to fade a bit, some of the crewmembers thought it best to go outside guns blazing and rise to the aid of the rest of the crew, despite the danger they'd be putting themselves in. Unfortunately for them, an apprehensive Adams had wisely thought it best to leave a small group of mostly noncombatants behind in case it proved to be too dangerous a situation for them to handle, sending only the ones that deemed it absolutely vital to exit the room and protect the ship. As soon as the door system was fixed, they checked for locked and unlocked doors to assess the enemy's position, and then permanently locked down any and all remaining doorways in the ship, effectively stopping whoever it was that was causing havoc on the ship from moving freely. A few curious details came to Adams mind, such as the fact that the CIC had apparently not been breached yet, that the largest concentration of crewmembers would be somewhere around the medbay and that the records indicated that the enemy was not an outside force, as neither the hatch in the CIC nor the cargo holds' ramp had been opened or lowered. Finding solace in the idea that a single man had snapped and that he was probably already down gave Adams some sense of relief, but something still bugged about the situation, even though he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He chalked it up as nothing more of a whim and prepared any fighters in the group to assault the outside and see if the threat was already neutralized. However, he himself would not leave due to the unanimous request from the others that he was to remain inside and lead everyone in safety should the assault team not return.

Since then, no one had returned to their hiding spot, much to everyone's worry and dismay. Grief struck a young lady he recognized to be Talitha Draven, who's sister, Rosamund Draven, had gone out with the others. She meekly wept and cried herself to despair in a corner, vaguely praying and cursing to no one in particular to bring her sister back. She cradled herself to sleep eventually, and Adams had a few others keep her company so her spirits wouldn't falter too much. In the end, as much as it pained him to be helpless, that was all he could do about her besides waiting. Someone managed to find an emergency blanket somewhere and covered her sleeping and crying form with it, a tribute to hope in the midst of despair, it seemed like.

Eventually, and much to everyone's temporary relief, all the noise apparently disappeared all of the sudden, leaving behind an ominous silence and the expectation of something yet worst to come. Everyone felt as if they were only facing the calm before the storm. But moments became minutes, and minutes to hours. They all held their breaths, waiting, stalling themselves for time, ready to go back into the fearful hell they had been going through. But nothing happened. The silence and darkness greeted them as if they were old friends upon which one could entirely rely on and for a moment, they all thought they could be at ease once more and walk out to the rest of the ship, perhaps even to greet their companions. A growing sensation of safety, and hope that the worst was over, started spreading through everyone. Tired, desperate for hope and now being presented with an opportunity to free themselves from that small cubicle that had been as their cell for the last hours, they drove themselves into believing that everything, and everyone, was just fine.

Then they heard footsteps. At first, they all thought this to be a good thing: someone else was alive and searching for them, perhaps even it was the assault team and they had returned to rescue their companions! Yes, hope now flowed across everyone's chests, they were restless for salvation, for a chance at riding themselves of the dread and get answers and comfort in whatever and whoever they found outside the compartment. So, they tracked the footprints as they became closer and closer, eventually stopping at the door that lead to Engineering. At that moment, at that critical, decisive moment in which everyone thought they were saved, Adam's hope for a peaceful resolution faltered and he knew what must be done. He ordered everyone to not move a muscle and be as quiet as humanly possible. Some tried to oppose him, but he quickly, and more importantly, quietly persuaded them. They heard in silence and contempt what seemed to be the deranged ramblings of a madman, but eventually complied do to his hierarchical superiority.

But now, even the most optimistic ones where starting to question their possibilities. Soon after the footsteps reached what should be the door to the upper Engineering location, small, mechanical noises had become more and more evident, like a metal rode was being gently tipped into the floor. The noises had grown progressively louder, and soon enough, it became clear that the pattern of the footsteps coincided with this metallic sound. And so, suddenly, everyone who still believed they were getting rescued anytime soon got their hopes crushed. All of them glanced over towards Adams in terror. They could all feel the impending danger breathing down their necks, death's grip only a short twist away, and they clutched each other and begged for mercy as their sweat started pouring down from their faces and their thoughts blurred from fear.

They closely inspected every single sound in the vicinity, the heavy breathing and panting of some blending in with the sounds of wobbling air coming from outside. Adams thought he'd recognized the sound from an earlier event, perhaps from a military drone or such, but he could not exactly pinpoint the model, or how such a thing could replicate footsteps. Scared, but determined to leave the room alive and with no other reassurance besides his own will to live, he turned to his one trump card to try and get them out of there. The whole crew's eyes seemed to mirror his and soon, they were all looking in the same direction. They needed someone. They needed a hero. Someone relentless, who wouldn't give up no matter what happened. They needed a bearer of hope, the embodiment of their trust and skill as Engineers. They all knew who could fit the description. From the beginning, ever since that person had first worked on the ship, they'd all recognized that any notions of prejudice had been stupid. Who better to save them? They knew in their hearts that their fatted hero lied amongst them right now. And they looked at their only shot getting one such person, everything they had put into one final act of hope, desperation, anger, calm and determination.

Right at Tali.

…

Shepard couldn't believe it. He didn't want to believe it. There was no way it could be true. All his crewmembers taken… presumably killed, or meeting with a fate worst than death… by machines?

"Doctor… are you saying that all of the crew were taken somewhere by a group of sentient machines?"-he said in disbelief, still not wanting to accept what he had heard. The faces of his friends flashed before his eyes as he tried to remember their smiles not so long ago. He wouldn't have it. Not Garrus. Kaiden. Ashley. Wrex. Liara. Tali. None of them would have fallen just like that. He refused to believe it.

Chakwas seemed distressed. She looked over at Joker, who was still lying down on the operating table resignedly waiting to be patched up, attempting to seek help in responding to Shepard, but all she managed to get from Jeff was a preoccupied shrug. She knew what this would seem like to him. The whole crew dying under his command? She'd read his files. It would send him back into a post-Elysium state. He'd blame himself for their deaths for the rest of his life. And right now they needed him to focus.

"I… I'm afraid so, Shepard. They… they were relentless. I saw it happen first hand. They… took everyone down…"

"No… no, that can't be right! They couldn't have taken the ship with the normal war faring drones the Alliance issues!"- this was bad. He was keeping his wits about him, but he noticed that he'd started panting. His heart was pumping far too fast, and he was feeling dizzy. He couldn't let it happen again… could he? All of them, their faces… why couldn't he remember all of their faces? Why… why was he feeling this way? He needed to get up, to fight, to save them! But, why… when had he tucked his head between his hands? Why was it so hard to breathe? Why was it so hard to think? Why was he so hopeless?

"Shepard, please, look at me!"-Chakwas yelled from what seemed a mile away. It didn't matter. He was already back there. Elysium. Everything on fire. Ramirez dead. Ria dying in his arms. And his crew lost, so lost, and he was just so tired and frustrated and beaten down… He could feel himself slipping into the void, alone, worthless, good as dead. He'd failed everyone again, even after promising he wouldn't. He'd gone through so much, he'd stared death in the eye more than once and seen those close to him fall, but this, having everyone… everyone die?! He couldn't cope with it. He needed some way to save them, he couldn't breathe, he was…

"Don't give up."

A voice came from the apparent nothingness that surrounded him. He felt himself being drawn back into reality by those words. What…

He looked around and found himself still in the medbay. He raised his head and looked at the source. Joker looked back.

"Don't you dare give up on them now."-Jeff said with a somber look in his eyes, an expression Shepard had never seen on the man. It was bizarre. Was this really the same Joker that would always make those terrible puns in the cockpit? Why was he… so strong right now?

"Jeff…"-he managed to whimper amidst breaths, still refusing to let down tears, but on the verge of breaking apart. He had to hold on to something, and those words were his anchor.

"You don't have the right to give up now!"-Jeff yelled at him with all his might, leaving Shepard in a daze. He'd… given up? He slowly looked down at his hands and saw them shaking. Had he really been that weak? –"They all put their faith in you! You're their Commander, you're the one that got us all into this mess! So stop whimpering and get us out!"-Jeff kept going, louder and louder, never stopping. He got up from his bed, despite the injuries to his leg and the anesthetic.

"Jeff, your leg…"-Chakwas attempted to intervene but it was too late. Joker had already gotten up and walked over to Shepard. He grabbed the Commander by the collar and forced him to look him in the eye.

"They all trust you with their lives. We knew we might die when we signed up with the Alliance. But we knew that at least then our deaths would mean something! If they die here… If it ends here, they'll all have died for nothing! We won't have stopped Saren, or the Reapers, or even the fucking AI that tore through our men! SO GET UP!"

Shepard was down. He was beaten. He was near collapse. He was near defeat.

But he wasn't dead yet.

Grabbing Joker's hand with brutal strength but enough care not to harm him, he released himself from the pilot's grip with a dark expression. Then he forced his mind to obey. He went back there again through Elysium, through death, through everything. And stopped before.

"Don't give up."-she'd said after they'd woken up on the same bed after a night of drinking and fun with their comrades. It was still dark, but he could se her as clearly as daylight. He looked at her smile inquisitively and smiled back while caressing her cheek. How he now wished he'd said a million more things to her, but the past would not change, and he heard himself say it again.

"What do you mean, Ria?"-he remembered the moment vividly, every touch of his fingers on her warm face as they both laid in absolute bliss. She was on her side, facing away from him, and he was lying on his back. She breathed in heavily and put his arm over her shoulder and grabbed onto it as hard as she could.

"If anything were to happen to me…"

"Don't say that. You know I'll always be there to protect you."-he had moved to a more comfortable position and was now almost on top of her, looking down on her with a serious face. She stared at him with love just overflowing from her eyes, but there was a hint of sadness in them too. He used his other arm to take her hand and kiss it.

"How I'd love that to be true. But you know not even you can make that claim."

"Ria…"

"We'll be out of Elysium and back to fighting batarians by the end of the week. I know I should be enjoying myself to the fullest, but I have to know that whatever happens you won't give up."-she looked at him with the most serious and desperate expression he'd ever seen her wear. He wanted nothing more than to make it go away.

"We could just give up. Find a new job. Raise a family on some colony, become… I dunno, farmers or something."-he said, trying to avoid heeding her request. She smiled a bit and pulled him in for a kiss. Then she put her forehead against his and wrapped both her arms around his neck.

"You know we can't. We have to protect everyone else…"

"I only care about protecting you."-he teased, stealing yet another peck at her lips as fast as he could before returning to his normal position. She turned around to face him again. He loved her black hair and the way it smelled and felt. But he loved being like this with her even more.

"That's a lie and you know it. You've already told me that you wanted to protect as many people you could. That's why you joined the Alliance, isn't it?"-she grabbed onto him and pulled him closer. She was dead serious about what she was saying, and worst of all, she was right. He hissed a bit but he knew he couldn't stay mad at her for too long.

"Fine, I won't give up if anything happens. But it won't. I'd rather die."-Shepard said as he spooned with her one more time. They had to get up soon and meet the rest of their squad to celebrate their shore leave.

"No, that's exactly what I'm trying to prevent!"-she gently tugged at his arm and yelled at him in a cute fashion. Why hadn't he said he loved her yet? If only he could go back… -"Promise me. Whatever happens out there, you won't give up on anything again. Not on your life, not on the job… and not on being happy. Ok?"-her talk left him in a daze and he scratched his head without a proper reply to give. He knew what he'd gotten himself into when he became and fell in love with a soldier. But this kind of talk made him feel a lot more apprehensive than his usual self.

"Aren't you overdoing this just a little bit? I mean…"-he stopped suddenly when he felt her finger run through his lips. He looked her in the eyes and saw the stars reflected in them. She was gorgeous right then. What could he do to say no?

"Promise me."

"I promise."

"You promise what?"

At that moment, when he was about to relieve one of the most beautiful and cherished moments of his life, Shepard snapped back into reality. He remembered. He knew. He felt a burning feeling inside of his chest, growing and feasting on him. A strange, consuming feeling that filled the depths of his being. Something primal snapped inside of him. But the flame was power. It was something he'd thought long forgotten. A promise long relinquished, but never broken. Until now.

He'd come to far. He wouldn't let himself, or his crew, die on some stupid rock just because he didn't have the balls to act when he was needed.

Everyone's faces flashed before his eyes. They were there. Smiling. They were always with him. He wouldn't let them die. He would not die.

"Commander?"-Chakwas asked as she saw him clench his fist and raise it to his head. It was a simple, but powerful gesture. At that moment, he looked like a completely different man. It was an intimidating sight, to see a man apparently broke become this resolute person in such a short time. She'd seen Shepard before though. She'd seen him when he was protecting friends, loved ones, when he lost people, men, women, friends, when he was at his weakest and at his strongest. But the sight that lay before her… scared her. But… it filled her with hope too. It was as if the man she'd known was gone for now. Someone else stood where that man, who'd seen so much and lost so much too. Someone with an air to him that could split her doubts in two. He stood strong despise all that had happened. He was brave.

"Shepard?"-Joker asked as the Commander snapped back into a military stance and made a grab for some medigel and restocked his equipment. –"What… what will you do?"

"Promise."-her voice flew through his mind, and he bit his lip. Looking down on his hands, they weren't shaking anymore. He could fill the warmth of her skin still lingering on the tip of his fingers. He was determined to see this through. He knew exactly what to say.

"I will never give up again."-in the past long gone, he'd smiled. And she'd smiled back.


	31. Bigger Fish To Fry

Authors note: Sorry this chapter is smaller, but I promised I wouldn't let this story go and I meant it! SO even if it's small, here's an update, I poured all my remaining time into it and I hope you enjoy!

…

"Doctor Chakwas. What did all this?"-Shepard glanced over towards the doctor with an iron gaze, making her gulp slightly before hesitantly thinking up of a response.

"What do you mean? The V.I… no, the A.I. thing did. _It_ took everyone with it Shepard."-Chakwas said struggling to remember everything that had happened to her and her crewmates just recently. The thoughts of the screams, of her being suddenly locked inside the medbay, alone and helpless as she heard the others cry out for mercy, and the footsteps, those horrifying metal footsteps that had accompanied the drones… it made her cringe in fear for a bit. But she wouldn't fall apart too easily. She was a military doctor. She'd seen the worst of the worst, and she had trained herself not to lose her cool easily. After all, the injuries she'd seen during the campaign against batarian slavers would have sent most people away screaming.

However, the Commander seemed unimpressed by her answer. He turned towards her, rifle in hands, a decisive and determined expression on his face as he probed for more specific information.

"That brings up another question, which you shall answer latter. You see, I'd understood that much already, doctor. I need you to tell me exactly _what_ did this, not who. It couldn't have been drones, obviously. Those things wouldn't have been strong enough to carry all the bodies out of here. Which means it would have been some stronger, larger model."-his eyes glinted for a bit with a sudden gleam of understanding and the a somewhat striking realization. Chakwas noticed this and knew instantly that the Commander had already deduced what had happened.

"You already know, don't you?"-she asked, a somber expression taking over her as she backed up into a corner. She grabbed her left hand with the other and started fidgeting a bit.

"G-1 types, huh? Never thought they'd have anything like that here. Is that why Hackett didn't give us any special info about the mission? Is that why he chose us?"-Shepard said as he stroked his chin and then slowly walked towards the door to the outside. He seemed to have no intention of returning anytime soon or explaining himself. –"Joker, let the doctor heal you. Doctor, I'll shut the door down once I'm out. If you need to open it, redirect the power from the third power coupling to the fifth."-in a flash, he'd opened the door and walked out. Joker figured he needed some answer though, so he spoke up.

"Hum, hello? Ignorant pilot here! Mind telling us where the hell you're going? And what the hell is a G-1 type?"

Shepard suddenly stopped, back turned to the other two. From the corner of his eye, Joker saw him clench his fist and straighten up his head. Without turning around, Shepard answered him.

"A G-1 type is the Alliance and Council's designation for a humanoid-class sentient machine. However, most people settle on generically calling them for their original given name… geth."- the fact that his stance didn't change for a second while he said these words made Joker get small goose bumps all over his skin as he realized just how seriously Shepard was taking this.

"G… geth? Here on Luna? No… they wouldn't… how…?"- he was shocked by the possibility that the mechanical fiends they'd been striving to fight for the last couple of months had somehow made their way to Earth, the human homeworld. How could they have a base of operations so close and have gone unnoticed for so long?

"They didn't. Simple as that. Geth were simply being brought in from battle zones after deactivation and were sent here to be studied. Their carcasses were probably used for target practice so that the trainees had a general idea of what they were fighting. Hell, I probably killed some of the things that are walking around here."-Shepard stayed absolutely calm as he explained it, not once turning around to face Joker and Chakwas. He was too focused on something else that had caught his attention meanwhile.

"Th-that's insane…"

"Believe me if you want to, or don't. Right now, I seriously don't care. I need to protect everyone. Chakwas?"-Shepard coldly said, surprising both Joker and the doctor. She promptly responded.

"Yes, Commander?"-she said, a bit scared of what he would want.

"Did anyone get killed in front of you?"-he asked without even the slightest hint of his voice faltering. She started breathing a little bit more heavily in response and he knew he had his answer. –"So you don't know if they're dead or not."

"They were shot! But… the amount of blood they lost… their body language… I think they used some sort of specialized ammo…"

"Could they be alive?"-he finally turned his head around over his shoulder and drily put his question. She could see a violent anger and determination in his gaze and made haste to give him a reply.

"Yes."

"Then that's all I needed to know."-he started walking away again but something made him suddenly stop once more and face them head on. –"Take care of yourselves while I'm gone, ok? I can't let you guys die on me."- in an instant, all that will of iron that had formed around him dropped and they caught a glimpse of the usual Shepard, the man that cared for hi crew more than his own life. It lasted only a second before he went back to his unflinching soldier state, but it was enough to give them their hope back.

"Commander, wait!"-Joker yelled before they finally parted ways. –"You still haven't told us what you're gonna do."-Shepard heard this and seemed to smirk for a second before looking all serious again.

"Isn't it obvious?"-he asked as he raised his shotgun up to his head and leaned it on his shoulder. –"I'm going to save everyone, and get us all the hell away from this goddamn rock. Then, I'll have every idiot responsible for hurting my crew get their careers beaten up so badly they'd need a cane to just stand up ever again. _That's_ what I'm going to do."-then he left them, and started heading towards the elevator that headed down to the lower Normandy decks.

"Godspeed!"-he heard Joker scream from a distance and smiled once again before bringing up his barrier and preparing his pistol for rapid fire. And then, more faintly, in such a way he couldn't even tell if he'd really heard something, he thought he heard Joker again. –"Don't die on us, goody two-shoes."

'I have no intentions of doing so.'-he pumped his shotgun and pressed the button to go down.


	32. Trapped

_Authors note: Alright guys, it's me again! In this update, I'd like to talk a bit about my chapter update schedule a little bit before moving on to the actual story. As you may have noticed, the chapters have been getting quite smaller, and farther in between when it comes to publishing dates. This is mostly because of three reasons: authors block, after the story starts to lose that ultimate interest you had in the beginning and you don't really now what to write; laziness, since many times I'd rather be watching a video or hanging out with my chums instead of sitting my ass down and writing, and to my great dismay, exams. God, screw exams. I'm not gonna go too much into details here, but holy crap. No. Just no. The difficulty spike as gone through the roof, and with all the pressure to manage to get outstanding grades to get into the college you want and end up with whatever job you want… there's literately just not enough time. And I've mentioned before, I'm the kind of lazy ass that hates work and just plays videogames with his friends whenever he feels like it, and then feels terrible about himself because he was supposed to be working. Hell, I should technically be studying for another exam next week, but I thought "No. You know what? I still haven't written a chapter, and I've been slaking off. They deserve to know."_

 _So, having said that, I'm officially announcing the end to the regular updates. I just can't keep up, man. I know. I'm a slacker. Sorry. I write these things whenever I possibly can get a hand on my buddy's Macintosh, but I'm just really out of time. And I'm so freaking tired. I have swimming practice on top of that, and then guitar practice, theater class, I attend a French institute so I can learn French… It's just sucking the ever living crap out of me, and it's draining. It just doesn't feel like I can keep up with three updates a week, each one with at least a thousand words, and that's a number I'm ashamed of, a thousand words is quite frankly a piece of garbage. It's like a five minute read. So, again, I'm sorry, but I'm going to make irregularly_ _ **intervaled**_ _(I'm pretty sure that's a word despite word telling me otherwise), hopefully longer chapters from now on. I hope you guys can understand, but that's just how it is. Feel free to beat me up on the street about it whenever you want to._

 _Anyway, thank you all again for enjoying this. The favorites number gets bigger around every week to fifteen days, which just makes me feel outstandingly amazed, specially since my quality as sort of gone kaput as of lately. Thank you, everyone. And I'm sorry I couldn't keep up the pace. Which doesn't mean I'll give up on it, though. Oh, no sir. Whenever I get a chance, I'll be blasting through chapters so fast you won't see them coming! Just probably not anytime soon…_

 _Good read. And my deepest gratitude._

 _Porygonman_

 _TL;DR- Author is whiny bitch, cannot update regularly from now on._

…

Adams was tired. And hungry. And he reeked from the grease and oil that he'd gotten on himself while maintaining the Normandy's systems. But, gods damn, he was still alive.

The footsteps had been surrounding their position for quite a while now, making louder and louder noises each time. They'd even banged on the upstairs doors a couple of times, bringing about a small outburst of widespread panic, but luckily enough, it not only appeared as if they still hadn't gained any sort of control over the door mechanism. However, there was an unspoken knowledge that everyone who was trapped with him down there was aware of at the time: the machines had had access to the Normandy's blueprints before the crash, the Commander had said so himself. It would only be a matter of time before they figured out a way to manually open those same doors. And when they did, there'd be widespread panic, likely to be ensued by their premature demise.

Suddenly, another noise, different from the usual, came from behind him. His shoulders tensed up from the sudden ruckus, before relaxing once more. He turned around when he recognized it: the sound of cloth and a very specific suit rubbing against the metal casing of the Normandy's floor.

"Alright, I've successfully rerouted the power towards heating. It should make all crewmembers yet alive avoid getting picked up by any scanners. It won't do much for larger groups of people, but maybe one or two can slip by unnoticed."-Tali said as she crawled away from a small shaft that lead to a compartment of the Normandy filled to the brim with power lines, processing units and small access vents. Lots and lots of vents. She hated them, and figured she always would.

Adams managed to grin a bit when he watched her shake of the biggest droplets of grease from her visor and suit and attempted to walk it off. Even amidst all the chaos, he found it funny the way she glinted like a flare due to all the emergency lights reflecting of her greased up suit. Then, he looked towards more pressing matters: the downright depressed crew.

Not so long ago, the others had watched as she had tightly squeezed in there to try and find a solution to their current predicament, and had been patiently waiting for her return ever since. It seemed that without both hers and Adams' constant guidance, the group simply couldn't hold together, and a few muffled shrieks was all it took for something to notice them. They saw the older officer and the strange, prodigy alien as the only hope they had to leave with their heads still attached to their shoulders.

So it was no surprise when one of these brilliant, scared and meek engineers noticed the true meaning behind her words and started freaking out.

"Wait… w-what? You… tampered with the heating system? Wouldn't that mean they'd be able to know someone was here? And instead of making us safer, you… you distributed power accordingly to different rooms, which are probably empty anyway?! Do you WANT us to die here? I… I can't die like this! Is THIS WHAT YOU WANTED THE WHOLE TIME? Cause you've just got to say it, and I'll open that damn door right there and get this all over with already! At least whatever is out there wouldn't play sick games with us!"-the young man shouted, losing his cool and raising his voice. He got up and started thrashing around the small hideout, and worst of all, making a heck of a lot of noise. Needless to say, this made the situation get way out of hand, and others stared panicking too. Soon, all their trust began to fade a bit.

"She must be in cahoots with the outsiders! She's been here to freak us out and stop us from helping the others!"-another young man said, earning him the shocked gaze of many others and an absolutely terrified expression from Tali. She'd been subjected to discrimination before, but this? This was as bad as it got. They were in a life or death situation, and instead of focusing on surviving, they were carefully pondering whether or not to burn her in a stake and get it over with.

The noises got louder in response to the commotion. Things were looking downhill, fast. If nothing happened immediately, their position would be certainly compromised, and everyone would die, regardless of what their thoughts on Tali were.

That's when Adams stepped in. No one could actually remember the exact details of what happened, but in a flash, he'd walked up to the original troublemaker and straight up punched him in the face. The punch sent the other man tumbling down, no screams, no chance of retaliation, instantly knocked out. As people were still beginning to notice what had happened, Adams had already walked up to the one that had made the insinuations that Tali was there to kill them and stuck a left hook straight in his gut, making the other man spit all the contents of his mouth and bend forward, before falling to the ground and gasping for air.

Tali was left standing there, absolutely mortified and speechless. In the midst of her shock she managed to look around and it seemed pretty clear that everyone else was speechless too. Had Adams finally snapped? Was there really no way they were going to get out of there? She looked around and quickly found that all of the others had reacted just like her. Awkwardly enough, in the face of something so ludicrously amazing, the room went into absolute silence.

"Phew. If they hadn't shut up I'm afraid we'd be in a hell of a lot of trouble right now."-Adams finally muttered as he turned to see the stunned faces of his crewmates. Without even a second to spare, he shook his hand around in the air as if shooing an annoying fly. –"What are you all looking at? We can't make too much noise or those things outside will hear us. Are you daft or something? Now pick these losers up and let me give you two important and useful pieces of information."-his look suddenly became more serious and he stared at everyone with a cold, iron glare that froze everyone on the spot, forcing them to hear him out, be it out of fear or respect alike.- "Number one. I have every intention of getting out of here alive, but I would not have any other crewmembers endangered in the process. Protecting every person in this ship, even if it's most likely to be too late, will always be my first priority. I don't care how slim the chance, I'll take it. I wouldn't hold Tali's actions against her for a second. Number two: Tali is just a respectable person as you are. She's the same as you in rights, duties, humanity. She's a person like every single one of you, god damn it. If I called out anyone for being of a different ethnicity than mine, or for having a different skin color, or some half baked political preference, I'd have the whole freaking populace after me with torches and pitchforks. But if it's to turn on someone different from all of us, someone we can pin all our problems on without consequences, we do it in a heartbeat. That's disgusting, and frankly despicable. All of you who do this make me sick."-he made a quick pause to catch his breath and give the crew an accusing glance. The air seemed to stiffen as he stared into all of them and exposed their shame, their resentment, their anger and fear. So he kept going until he could be sure his point had come across. –"You want to play by your rules? Try to debate whether or not she betrayed us to the enemy? Then we're doing this the human way. Let it be known now, that she, as all of you, falls under the assumption that she is innocent until proven otherwise. Therefore, if I hear any claims about her affiliation with the enemy or any hostile without proof, I will personally see it that you are all court-martialed. Did I make myself clear enough, or do I need to beat it into you people again?"

Everyone who had doubted his words or disagreed with him so far was instantly persuaded. It seemed as if his words had hit an especially sensitive spot, specially since he'd spoken them with such conviction. By alluding to an ancient human tradition and exposing his own opinion on Tali's actions, combined with his swift take out of the major troublemakers and his decisive, compelling argumentation, Adams had successfully defused the situation in the best way possible. As she thought about this, Tali realized just how much she could yet learn from this charismatic character that had been serving as her mentor aboard the Normandy ever since she'd arrived.

'Maybe if I make it out, I can ask Shepard more about him…'-thinking of such possibilities made her happy for a split second, but then she was reminded of her current predicament and of the very likely chance that the Commander was dead. Her heart seemed to twist around tightly in her chest. –'No… he wouldn't just die like that. I know it… right? Heroes don't die… Whatever happens, he'll make it out… I hope… please make it out… Oh Keelah, if he doesn't make it out, what will any of us do…'

"Tali!"- hearing her name being called out at that moment of introspection was enough to make her jump a bit on the spot. She quickly shunned such deadbeat thoughts from her psyche and turned towards the task at hand. She looked back to see Adams staring at her. His eyes and his pose denounced his concern over her, which she rapidly moved to end. –"Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes… of course. I'm fine thank you. Now's not the time for you to be concerned over me. Let's just focus on the current situation."-she said, a bit more coldly than she wanted. She had no intention of coming across as rude, but she needed an outlet to let a bit of her frustrations and insecurities out if she was going to lead the others to safety. Adams seemed to be able to notice this in her eyes though, and ever the understanding superior, he let her walk out with her dignity by replying only with a sympathetic nod.

Their calm little moment, however, was promptly broken by the sudden noises of something banging heavily against the door, and commotion outside the Engineering deck. It seemed as if they'd just caused too much ruckus before with the yelling and the tampering with the systems. But everyone present seemed to acknowledge that none of that mattered now as the sounds of metal creaking and bending filled the compartment. With a rapid glance, Tali and Adams shared their thoughts and knew what they must do. Following a previously discussed strategy, as Tali quickly shut down the lights around the group and started leading all of the weakest crewmembers, now in an even bigger state of disarray than before but still barely managing to keep quiet, Adams in turn started preparing a group mostly comprised of bulkier men and women to attack the intruders at the first opportunity they had.

As the tension pilled on, the incessant beating came to a momentary halt. Seconds, minutes, it seemed as hours passed for everyone that was in there.

And suddenly, footsteps where heard again, and the door manually opened.


End file.
